Kissing air

Inspired by Because of you by After School and Calling you by Seo in Kook. Hope you like it

Kissing air

You chased after me. I shove open the door with a deafening crash, slamming it against the opposite wall. You rise and call out to me--incoherent words and meaningless phrases. The late afternoon light is bronze and sears my cheeks without notice. The suitcase in my hand is empty, barren and void like a desert; what do I have to take with me when you’ve plundered and stolen everything else? The lonely dirt road is strangely unfamiliar but the train station is in sight. I stride towards it…

You caught my hand. As you wrench my body to face towards you, your gasps surge down my face and your dark eyes distort, wild with fear. You ask me stupidly if I was really going. When I recoil away, you pluck me back again as if I am a flower that bends away from your oppressive wind. Staring at me to the point of being a glare, you tell me not to leave. My dress slides easily over my body like the ocean’s waters; what happened to the love that was born that day I first touched the sea’s tears? A distant ringing weaves in between us like a fluttering butterfly, warning me that the train was leaving. I start to tear away…

You drew my lips to yours. As I try to break free again, you yank me in and your cold lips presses against mine. Your hand screens and masks my cheek. For a moment, I forget my anger and everything seems right again.  But I remember her, the one who destroyed everything that was right between us. I can feel the cold ring on your finger that presses against my cheek like a cold glass window; why did you care if you had her? A hard slap across the face shatters our contact. Hot angry tears scald my eyes and face. I turn away, knowing that if my gaze crosses yours I would lose sight of all reason to leave, to become your chained prisoner again. My eyes didn’t catch yours…

The hard road pounds against my feet. My sandals unravel then fall away, allowing loose stones to claw and to slice at my skin. The torrid heat parches my already impoverished throat. Rasps heave my body and, for an instant, the sun shudders. Then your voice screams the phrase that threatens to draw me back and make my tears storm for you. To weep for the paradise lost to us. Those two words still rings in my ear as my feet whisk me away. “Don’t go!”

~~~

Screech! The ear-piercing sound as the train shrieks to a stop slaps me out of my shrouding thoughts. I look up. I’m alone on this platform with only the dry wind as my companion. I see myself standing, abandoned on the forsaken platform like the sole survivor standing in the scorching desolation of an all-consuming firestorm.

Then I remember. When I left, you didn’t chase after me or catch my hand or kiss me or beg me to stay. You didn’t care enough to come after me. You chose her and forgot me.

You didn’t follow.

The sliding door glides open before me with a low hiss. Staring over my shoulder one last time, there is only empty space waiting for me on the tiled platform. Then I wrap my hand around the handle to hoist myself up onto the lined steps.

Suddenly, something wispy curls around my wrist, stopping me. There you were, the most perfect mirage that my delusional mind could create. This apparition has the special scent that you had. Your echoing words of “don’t go”, like the last dying notes of a love song...

I am shocked to find that even shaking my head is difficult. Your eyes convey the deepest regret that would’ve never appeared on your real face and warmth spreads from me for this flawless illusion that takes your smooth features. Before I can stop myself, I close my eyes and lean forward. My lips touch yours so tenderly.

To the world, I was just kissing air. Maybe I was just kissing my heart good-bye. But that last fleeting kiss, like a grazing butterfly, tasted like the salty tears of a far away ocean where a love was once born.

If only you cared enough to follow…

If only you cared that much…

Author's Note

Any suggestions?

Reviews

[Alicia™]

The flow is great, and the emotions are raw. Like Revolutionary said, it's more like poetry than a story, which is awesome. However, I think you should change the term "half-crazy" to something like "delusional", because "half-crazy" doesn't quite fit the flow. Awesome job! Added it to my faves. :)

[Larry Dyson]

excelent word play here..."My dress slides easily over my body like the ocean’s waters; what happened to the love that was born that day I first touched the sea’s tears? A distant ringing weaves in between us like a fluttering butterfly, warning me that the train was leaving. I start to tear away"

[sarah]

GUYS SHOULD ALWAYS FOLLOW THE GIRLS WHEN THEY LEAEVE!!

[Auralia]

wow.......
that's all i have to say.
deep, yet kept me going........
the emotions going on in this story is so authentic and direct.
great job!!!!

[Aynsley]

Hey, thanks for entering this into my contest. It's really good.

[Lucia]

This was really intense to read. From the beginning i felt like I had been thrust into a story i was already living in. I was seriously on the edge of my chair painfully waiting to see what would come next. It's really funny how you did that. I don't even know the characters names, nor the true situation, yet it was so easy to connect to them.
Astounding! This is probably one of my favorites of yours.

[Kanattas Atir Enomo]

wow, this story was amazing and the emotions are so clear. it flowed really well for the most part and apart from a few typos this was amazing. the details were amzing and i could picture the entire scene in my mind's eye. great piece.

[Larry Dyson]

kewl...glad you won ..it is a really well written story!

[Larry Dyson]

love the progression, the imagery forshadowing the reality to come..some grammer mistakes.."As you (wretch)-wrench my body..".agree with changing "half-crazy"...also..after the beginning line"you chased"..I think the word "stride" at the end is incongruent with the action set in motion....?all in all a nice start to a story....a nice poem by its self

[Michael X]

the idea, kissing air, draws upon a sense of desire and a play on thoughts
that have an endless meaning in ways, the storyline a fantasy in the light
of heartbreak played in a magnificently theatrical tone of ambience,
the details that bring your word to life create such an loneliness
like a siren's song, this is such a worthy read, you have clear talent, awsome imagery keep it up.

[lrigD]

This was beautiful, very haunting. I like how your story is clear, but we are still left to imagine what really happened - it definitely appeals to the imagination!