Submerged

We've been down this road once or twice before.

It's taken its toll, but still we beg for more.

We walk alone and together all the same,

play the game and hide when we're ashamed.

Leave behind everything we've known.

Go to places we've never been shown.

Take a breath, and plunge beneath the waves.

Surface, choke, and shackled legs like slaves.

There's nothing left above in the world you knew.

The grass is burnt and the sky's a faded blue.

Disaster struck while you were swimming free.

And now you forget everything you see.

Sometimes all you do is sing a song.

Forget your troubles, sigh, and go along.

But when the path is gone you'll be okay.

You can go swimming another day.

Reviews

[Ana B.]

This has such a wonderful development till the very end. What a beautiful sigh of mind. :)

[Not here]

Thank you :)

[Tomoe Tellez]

This is a pretty awesome poem. I loved it, really.

[Not here]

Thank you :)

[Crystal Overmeyer-Birmi..]

Nicely written. I love the rhythm and grace of it

[Not here]

Thank you!

[Ana]

On point as usual. I keep wondering how you have this talent, where does it come from??? I can barely write poems, when I can find words to rhyme and still make sense. Poem writing is a real talent when you can do that and you do it like it's nothing!

[Not here]

Thank you anna :) i really appreciate it and youre very good so dont doubt yourself!

[Willard Wells]

Nice write, with some very personal, thoughts, brought this piece. I feel there's more to the story to make it complete. Well done

[Not here]

Thank you Willard :) I really appreciate it and I hope things are going well for you!

[Willard Wells]

After a month this summer on an island in the Philippines, coming home alive, I am doing very well. Thanks.

[Not here]

Great! That sounds really interesting. I might have to hear about that sometime!

[Willard Wells]

Just go to FB and type in my name. Most of it's there if your interested.

[Meraki]

So pretty. Thank you for sharing with me.

[Not here]

No thank you for reading and liking! :)

[Emily]

Lovely poem!!
Keep it up!!

[Not here]

Thank you Emily :)

[Riley Justine]

Literal tears. This is so well written. The feeling of being free only to realize life never frees you. Really well written!

[Not here]

Thank you Riley :) I really appreciate it, and I'm glad you liked it so much!

[Josie E. Cook M. A.]

There's nothing left above in the world you knew.
The grass is burnt and the sky's a faded blue.
Disaster struck while you were swimming free.
And now you forget everything you see.

Sometimes all you do is sing a song.
Forget your troubles, sigh, and go along.
But when the path is gone you'll be okay.
You can go swimming another day.--these two stanzas are my favorite part of this.

They convey so much meaning about life and how it as a bearing on a person, and then how they react and cope with it.
Nice!

[Not here]

Thank you Josie :) I really appreciate it!

[dan]

david, this reads like a thoughtful guide to navigating the spins and jumps encountered by a loving couple's relationship; choppy waters calmed to a serene and calm tide. I believe that every relationship, no matter how strong, has its rough patches; constant work must be put it in order to keep it together in patchwork fashion.
An outstanding thought-provoking piece, very well done. take care...dan

[Not here]

Thank you dan :) That's exactly what I was going. I'm very glad you liked it.