Respected You!

...for all those who deserve this!

I'm stabbing myself in the chest

 

 

 

 

 

-Exhausted-

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

And every time I close my eyes

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I see you smile

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I'm dying- screaming

 

 

 

 

You’re smiling!

 

 

 

...

 

You ripped me off

 

~

You raped my soul - In front of my eyes-

 

 

 

 

I let you – always!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

~Oh~

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I respect you

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I don't want this

 

 

 

 

I want revenge

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I hate you.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Yes I hate you all!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

But I don't know,

 

 

 

 

 

What the '____' is wrong with me?!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Reviews

The whole smile after a frontal stab. That hurts more than a back stab. When they stab you in the back, there is still a distinctive fear or guilt on not doing it in your face. Stabbing you in front and smiling, that can kill.

This is a good format, rarely to never used. You give the reader time to digest each line before the next comes along.

Well painted words.

A very good piece

[PhoeniX]

a misled desire to seek revenge on the ones that hurt you. a good piece.

[Sarah]

This definitely conveys a lot of anger, accented by the unique way it was written. A lot of interesting concepts, for example, the line "You raped my soul - In front of my eyes-" The idea of seeing your soul being damaged right before you is powerful. Great job. (:

[Li Li]

I had to read this a couple times to see what more I got from it..... I'm trying to see through your vision... This was quite the rant. It came off as just that "a rant". I feel the power in it, but I don't see enough supporting content....

The spacing did add, but also pulled from it.

I'm not the one to leave a comment that is something different from what I feel or see in a piece. I feel as though anger could be a great emotion for you..... this could become something so much more.

The overall message was well executed....

Bless!

[Lyra H]

Rant on!

[julian3]

Powerful, arterial spurt of emotion; angst, betrayal, hurt, disgust, all encapsulated in few lines. Well done.

[DarkAngelWriter]

Wow. Just... just wow.

[laceyjane23]

Nice piece! everyone deserves to have a good rant and rave once in a while.
laceyjane

[Natalie C]

Great rant, and I sincerely hope that after you got this off your chest, you turned around and removed this knife from your back (not to return the favor - lol)

"What the '____' is wrong with me?!!"
Strange how we turn on ourselves if something goes wrong in our lives, looking for the fault within ourselves. Must be all part of being human, huh?

Nicely written, your anger and resentment clearly visiable, that your readers feels and experiences that anger with you!

[Irfan Shah]

Nice piece. My views about the use of word 'rape' are similar to that of Travis. Reason being that firstly it is not really a norm to use such words (however I do know that norms or rules keep changing, so its upto you to take it or not), secondly it make me feel as if it shows the weakness of this character... not really sure if thats the correct way to put it though.

All the best!

[Steve Thompson]

Interesting style you formated...and the way you formated it puts the reader through a elevator going down and down....nice piece