Life

I gaze at you from afar.

You sparkle just like a star.

You had stolen my heart.

Even though we were apart.

It's a struggle and a fight.

This is my life.

You walk along alone.

Wishing you were home.

You stare at the ground.

Without making a sound.

It's a struggle and a fight.

This is your life.

Now as we walk hand in hand.

We finally understand.

Our lives were good apart.

But better when joined at heart

It's no longer a fight.

This is our life

Reviews

[The Empty Hour Glass]

I enjoyed this. The concept of "united we stand, divided we fall" is well conferred in this work. Also, the incorporation of love into the poem is equally strong in terms of effect. Great work, and thank you for requesting I read this.

[Starrbitt]

Aw, its sweet and sounds really personal. Felt like you were reaching for this person and then happily ever after, you caught them. Well done.

[Shy Girl]

Don't we all want things to work out somehow?? But then again how would we learn or choose if things were easy? I like how you made that seem possible, having happy endings to lifes problems. (that word may seem small...but packs a punch on the grand scale..) Very nice piece. :)

[quarintine_deathangel]

Cool!, you made the worst of things into a perfect world, really interesting to read, nice job! ^.^

[Chris]

You tied it all together... happy endings do happen - just not as often as wished.

[Zoey Dead Girl]

I liked the format you wrote this in, how you ended each of the stanza was cute and sweet. Also nice story that goes along with this poem. Good work :3

[Owlgirl]

It's such a sweet poem, I love how you kept the last two lines similar in each stanza. Great rhyme scheme and the same ticking meter is used to control the smooth flow of the poem. Amazing and well done.

[blueseeker]

a continuing journey through each stanza.
nice write devanshi.

[MELODY CARNEY aka Kimbe..]

I enjoyed this poem. It was simple and sweet, nothing wrong with that. Your point was made and your story was shared. I liked that you mentioned “Our lives were good apart. But better when joined at heartIt's no longer a fight”. Well played. Thank you for the good read, I look forward to reading more of your work. Thank you.

[Jeanette]

Wow, beautiful... I love how everything was a fight, and a struggle, until they are together... very romantic. Good job! =)