Blondie <3

Bright as the sun blonde hair

Long and flowing like a calm river

Exciting starry glimmer in her eyes

Stunning and cunning hazel beauties

Her porcelain goddess face of beauty

She states in wonder at me and needs comfort

I lean in to see her ruby red lips wet with lust

I bite my lip and go in for a stunning moment of excellence

Our lust meets and time stops in bliss

We release from each other

Hazel beauties met my blue endless oceans

I slowly realize the stunning reality of this

Now it’s only a dream…

Reviews

[Ashley]

the word stunning is certainly what jumps out at me the most. it's used in here a lot, and i feel like that may not have been intentional. if it is, to me, it seems a bit awkward. it just detracts from the lustful flow of the rest of the piece. other than that the poem is certainly evocative of a lust filled dream. well done.

[Imagination-mage]

this is so cute and good makes me so jealous!!

[AbbigaleJordan]

I loved it A LOT!!!!:) haha:)
Cuteeee!
One thing I have realized
Most blondes have hazel eyes
I think dirty blondes look better then blondes with hazel eyes:D
xoxo
~abbie
100/100

[Kesha]

This was really good! You described it all so well! The formation was perfect! A wonderful poem all in all well too bad it had to be a dream

[dancing fish]

oh strong and stirring poem. Me likes.

[MoonAngel]

Well, you certainly get lust from this poem. Which is good, it was incredibly strong, which only shows how lovelorn the speaker is with this practically perfect woman. You use the word 'stunning' twice, though, and in the second instance 'stunning moment of excellence', it's not needed and doesn't make sense, in a way. Even just with 'I bite my lip and go in', we get a major whack of intensity. Also, your imagery's a bit bland, 'bright as sun blonde hair', 'blue endless oceans', 'starry glimmer'. I mean, it's lovely imagery, but really overused. It's all a bit tell and no show, but I enjoyed it. It provoked emotion in me and made me reflect on my own experiences of lust.

[Macy A. Brown]

I really loved this poem.

[Kerry O'Connor]

You have invoked the image of a stunning femme fatale in these lines... every man's dream, I'm sure.

Thank you for entering your work in the Thursday Challenge #3

[Marie Harrison]

Stunning poem
What a dream!

[Protect Me Demons That ..]

This was great. It kind of reminded me of the song 'Shadow Of A Doubt' by Sonic Youth for some reason.
The best line was the last one, "Now it’s only a dream…"
I could relate. 100/100