poem to be read at the very end of next year.

Next time I enter a relationship

I promise to stop needing stuff. Each armful,

each breath

every kiss -

all will be made erasable. Each

poem

every epos. Each slipper.

Every hand held.

Every hourly bathroom visit.

Each t**d.

Every outfit; all the ultraviolet.

I have to stop wanting things; judging things

since i'm a little fucked up myself.

Every rock farm will not

be a perfect cliff. Every turtle named

not the third part of a Triadic Greek ode.

Stop penning things

to the shadows of the past.

Stop thinking that everything

bad thing that will happen

will be my fault. 

Stop completing the sentences of the dead.

Stop planting in the soil where the ficus has grown

too large for the pot, anything that needs more time to

process. 

I have to start agreeing with the saints. I have to

start eating more honey and locus like

John the Baptist. 

Put more whole grains in my diet.

more flax seeds.

More turnips.

fewer spiders 

when i sleep.

I promise to stop pointing at 

outside influences. Like Degas

I need more ballet dancers in my dreams.

More arabesque's.

More brise',s.

I promise to be more merciful. 

more gullible.

(aren't they the same)

more willing..

more sexual. Primrose swatches

will be, henceforth, the strings

that open my new horizons.

so spare me the wedding talk 

the guilt of growing-older-and-living-alone

bullshit. 

I got this all worked out.

I promise.

Reviews

[Marvin Thomas Cox-Flynn..]

Sadly, we get from life and relationships, exactly, what we put into them, be that a little or a lot ... The sadder fact is that what we get is usually what we gave to ourselves, for we can never count on others to provide for our needs, physical, mental, or emotional ... If we do, we are doomed to a life of failure that shall end in our end ... Some guy smarter than I will ever be said, "To thine ownself, be true," wise words that I struggle to learn to apply to my own life ... I see some of that wisdom in your heart penned to page ... Never lose this poem, for one day you may need it as a refresher course when that next dose of user-idus comes along to feign love, romance, and life together forever ... Nice poem with a powerful message ...

Marvin Thomas Cox-Flynn

[h d e rushin]

what wonderful words to wake up to Marvin Thomas.And I agree. we can never count on other humans to provide our own needs..My needs are just that. mine. But being a human means that i share their many similarities with other humans. Your words are a powerful testament to the fact that we are all just one big tribe of like folk, just with different grades of hair.....dana

[Beccy]

As a new year's resolution, this would cause me to fail within a week. :))

The wealth of knowledge and understanding that only experience can bring, shines like a beacon in this wonderful poem.

Beccy.

[h d e rushin]

thank you my dearest Beccy...I had been fighting my usual, winter time chest infection....feeling better now.....i miss you....dana

[Corset]

" Ditto" I know, you hate it when I do that...you want it all spelled out in needlepoint on our sleeves, In this one Degas, is the form in which clay spins slippery and wet through our muddy fingers...although you shall never die, your ghost will haunt us while listing all the perfect reasons to never choke upon the word.

[h d e rushin]

beloved: you are wise beyond your days and months. Happy new year to you poetess/ dana

[Corset]

Happy New Year ;)

[Ken Simm.]

You have got to hand it to you dear friend. You live! And what is more ... you understand. Note only the three stops there. Never trust anyone who uses more than three stops. they don't know what they are talking about.
To say that I empathise is not enough. Because although I do; I am still amazed at your skill. Don't say talent because I don't believe in it. Don't say gift because you should take full responsibility for such genius. The very fact you can write such as this is because you have lived it, (and perhaps your experience says you should change it. Although that is a moot point). I'm wary about speaking too much about subject here and not enough about format. But that you can format and shape a poem like this is a given and I am truly amazed at the skill you've shown in telling these personal stories. If I was wearing a hat, I'd take it off. Amazing I tell you. And I too apologise for reading it too soon.

[h d e rushin]

thank you dear Ken..I am reminded of Sexton and how she was chided for being un-schooled, yet she had a wealth of experience. (old poets write with more of life's experiences than younger ones. but she surrounded herself with writers...( (Lowell, Snodgrass, Plath) and look at what happened. "You can't build little white picket fences to keep nightmares out" she said.

I have been so fortunate to write along side of you and the other many great writers here at the cafe...But ours, all of ours, are still works in progress...Thank you my dear friend and happy new year to you.....dana
s

[jacob erin-cilberto]

i wonder..."gullible and merciful" the same?

i have debated that quite often..

i guess i am with guilt...i am living alone....and being quite okay with it...
i was in relationships, enough of them that i do feel the need, no longer...

my dancers dance to funk in my dreams...

oh and sorry, dana, i couldn't wait till the end of next year to read this!

j.

[h d e rushin]

"my dancers dance to the funk in my dreams" ..
damn jacob. What a line.

Happy new year my friend.....dana

[Tony Jordan]

A girl friend (not girl-friend) once asked me why she wasn't getting hit on much and then she asked me if I knew how to show her how to 'behave like a maiden in despair' because she figured that was what guys wanted these days.
I don't think there is such a thing as the 'perfect match' - a partner who completes us. Instead there may be a gazillion people who fit a little, or a lot, while other's can be shoehorned like squares into round holes but never 100%.
I guess to want to find someone who if things don't work out, will be entirely wipe-able from all spheres of our lives would be ideal.
I like this Hde Rushin.
I'll give you a bell December 31st 2017 - see how things worked out.

[h d e rushin]

i have a cousin who only only wants you to date those people with compatible zodiac signs. So if you happen to fall in love with an incompatible sigh and they wind up trying to kill you, she will say, 'See, i told you so". No one is a perfect match. People just come from the same high school, or the same neighborhood, or from the same parish so people start calling 'familiarity' love, because of a lack for a better word.

I love your words here tony....thanks for offering them and happy new year to you....dana

[Tony Jordan]

Wow - it's takes all sorts eh Dana.
I come from a very ghetto-ised (mentality) community. Many do not leave the fourteen streets that make it up - in their lifetime !! They marry and no doubt inter-marry. A recipe for disaster which is already manifesting with a very high suicide ratio among teens here.
Yes, 'familiarity' = 'love' - what an observation!

You're welcome Dana.