Silent Solitudes

Beneath a sickly sky,

Against the motion

Of the heart,

Set apart

From the world;

From humanity.

 

Where ev’ry piece of pie

Becomes a notion

Of eternity:

 

We live, we die, we’re born again,

Never knowing when.

 

Feet on the shore and eye

Towards the ocean,

All night and day

Drifts in delay,

As time goes by-

 

Time is astray.

 

As simple passersby

With lack of lotion,

We burn beneath the sultry sun-

With hollow goals,

Stuffed hearts and souls-

And feel as though we weigh a ton.

 

From low to high,

Far out, nearby,

We live, we die

In commotion.

-EDP

Reviews

[CJ43223]

It's a life reflection near a beach. No matter how close you are to one another, the distance between them is set by your own. The second last was so true that sometimes you would wonder what the hell am I doing here?!

Thanks for sharing!

[emipoemi]

The "feet on the shore and eye towards the ocean" doesn't necessarily mean the poem is set by a beach. You would find as you read more of my work that there are a lot of metaphors playing about between the lines. So, sure, imagine a beach at your will, but you could also try to determine how the line adds to the overall message/metaphor. Thanks for reading! So glad you enjoyed it.

[H L Rose]

I can’t read this aloud without absolutely enjoying the way it sounds. Especially specifically the first and last stanzas.

“We live, we die/In commotion” was my favorite line, because it definitely conjoures up many contemplations I often have.

This poem as a whole has an intriguing sentiment that is interesting to ponder.

I enjoyed reading it!

[emipoemi]

Glad you did! Thank you!

[H L Rose]

Of course!

[olympiuslu]

I personally find this poem and the message it conveys beautiful. I feel like you have linked the significance of nature with humanity with such ease and expertise. As well as this, I just love the last stanza! It is so powerful and straight to the point, I think that it sums up the ideas and themes behind the poem nicely. Good job!

[emipoemi]

This is one of my most philosophical poems, so I'm so glad you enjoyed it (and took the time to think about it). Thanks you!

[Rachel Richardson]

I really enjoyed this, particularly stanza 6, lines 4-6.
Another beauty. (:

[MAC]

the circle of life, beautifully written.

[Rebecca Leigh]

wow this is a terrific piece... I love the musicality you have.

[emipoemi]

Thank you so much! Glad you enjoyed it.

[Doux Polverenere]

My breath was taken with every word...thank you for writing this

[emipoemi]

Thank you for reading. It means a lot. Glad you enjoyed it.

[Gaia Octavia]

A thoughtful, beautiful contemplation of the banality of life. It has always been a comforting thought to me that at any moment, my life could end and that I can do nothing about it. It makes it much easier to live with perspective as to what truly matters and what is just "commotion." To me, it is much easier than living blindly or afraid of death as do some of us - most of us - (all of us)? Nicely done.

[i am LiLy]

hey friend ...just read your poem 'weirdos' again.....I so totally do love that poem......
i read this poem here this morning and I've just read it again now.....
I understand why you see our poems read different .....I feel your rhyme and your structure......I do enjoy it but I could never write like that as my life has never had form or structure to inspire me...in my writing.
this is another fine work of yours...I do enjoy your poems my friend...I will read more of your work.
thank you.

maybe I am more of a writer than a poet......you have made me think.

[emipoemi]

It's always my intention to make people think (with my poems AND comments). You're a good writer, don't get me wrong. You have some very juicy lines in most of them. I was merely attempting to guide you to up the ante on the power and expression. Nothing more. I'm glad you enjoyed this one, and look forward to learning what you have to say about my other work (in your own time, of course). Thanks for reading.