MONEY OR LOVE!

I felt your heartache, as I listened to you cry,

I see how angry you get, as he tells you lie after lie.

I see you with him, you look so sad, so depressed,

I know when your with me, your happy and at your best. 

I listen to you brag, about all the gifts you have received,

I held you close, when your mother died and you greived. 

I was there for you through everything the bad and the good,

I did all the things you're boyfriend didn't but should. 

He seems perfect to you doesn't he? with the looks, the car, the lot.

Money, money, money his extremely rich, but is that all his got?

He treats you like his slave, or some sort of toy,

You deserve a real man not a little boy.

He may be able to buy you allot more than I ever could,

Although I love you, and I know he never would. 

Id treat you like my princess, If you ever gave me a chance,

If you where with me id show you true romance.

Be honest with yourself, because you know how you truly feel,

You want someone who can give you a love that is real.

You are far from happy, when your with this guy, 

Though you stay with him, and I can't see why.

He may be able to give you dimands rubies and pearls,

though he has cheated on you before, with many different girls. 

So open your eyes, and tell me just what you see,

Do you wan't to be with him or with me?

Reviews

[Jennie Baron]

Hi Cimmy, since you were so kind to review my writing, I thought I'd visit yours some more. This poem is very good indeed. Sometimes it's hard to write from the other gender's point of view (I've agonized over that in my book) but this is very believable. Maybe the song helped, eh? And yes, I guess often to men women seem to be like the one the narrator is talking to here. I liked this one a lot and I have no criticism at all except for some nitpicky grammar things.

wan't should be want
Id s/b I'd
you're s/b your
if you where s/b if you were
your s/b you're and vice versa

Spelling: dimands s/b diamonds

As I said, easily corrected, and no criticism intended. I just notice these grammar and spelling things.

Tell me if you aren't intere

[cimmy wuv xxxooo]

Thanks for the wonderful review, i appreciate it.
I think the song really did help. Though thanks for the compliment in saying I write well from a guys perspective :)
Ill have to get around to fixing them.
Thanks again :)

[Angad Waraich]

This is a great write my friend. Unfortunately i am pressed on time and i promised to look over your work so yeah this is good. Though i suggest a error check. Will read more soon.

Well done.

Thank you.
Angad

[cimmy wuv xxxooo]

thank you :)

[Johanna]

"He may be able to give you dimands rubies and pearls,
though he has cheated on you before, with many different girls.
So open your eyes, and tell me just what you see,
Do you wan't to be with him or with me?"

So good Cimmy.. wasn´t dissapointed. You see this in the world everyday.. money over love, and this poem described it so well, while telling a story I could picture.. and it made me keep hoping the person made the right decision. Great piece!

[cimmy wuv xxxooo]

Thanks hunny :) Hope you are doing well :)
I got inspired off a song from MKTO, Called could be me.
Thanks for yet another wonderful review

[Matching Socks]

Some women get caught up in the things that don't matter. It's not so much about as it is about security I guess.

[cimmy wuv xxxooo]

thanks for the review :)

[Laura Lynn]

Yeah, I second that, what Crane said, it's so classic, we know that it's a thing people do, when they see another person with the other person and feel like, I love that person way more than the other person could or would, we all different, but, these are very winning words,

[cimmy wuv xxxooo]

Thank you for your wonderful Review :)

[JC]

Damn, have you ever given this to her? This is an incredibly beautiful sentiment, you lay it all out, bare your soul and feelings. We all know what it's like to be on the sidelines, waiting for the moment to be noticed by the one we love...I'm sure anyone would want to receive something so heartfelt and real. Great job.

[cimmy wuv xxxooo]

I am a her lol :P
It wasn't about me or anyone I know, I just made it up. I got inspired by a song by MKTO. You ever heard of them?

[JC]

ha, nice...no I haven't will check them out on youtube.

[cimmy wuv xxxooo]

cool, you should there good :)

[misha]

This was a very truthful poem that grabbed my attention. It is sad to see that one could love such a person like they deserve but instead they choose to stay with someone who treats them terribly. Great write!

[cimmy wuv xxxooo]

Thanks so glad you enjoyed it :)

[Jessica Fronter]

nice one. :) I loved the way you rhymed it.

[cimmy wuv xxxooo]

Thank you :)