THE ATTEMPT

What im going through at the moment

I wonder what was going on in your head that night,
and how doing such a thing could ever feel right.
You didn't wake me, when these thoughts ran through your head,
Do you know how i felt to find you, and think you may be dead?

I guess that night nothing mattered, not even love,
Nothing seemed worth living for, when push came to shove.
The memories and good times, you wanted to leave behind,
Leaving yourself in that state, in the backyard, for me to find.

Bloody knife beside you, you laying still on the ground,
I called out to you in panic, but you didn't make a sound.
Until i went up closer, to see you shiver and shake,
I breathed in a sigh of relief, knowing you where awake.

You "were" confused and not yourself for a fair few days,
You "were" quiet and different, in quite a few ways.
Now that you are back to yourself, and getting well,
I don't think you realise how far you really fell.

What you did was allot more serious then what you think,
Your life could have been over, within a blink.
I still think it was selfish of you for sure,
to not want to be with the people who love you anymore.

Im pretty traumatised and going through "a lot"
You should never have put me in that spot.
I can't help but feel like i wasn't enough,
was it easy to leave me behind, when life got tough?

I can't understand it, and "there's" so many questions in my head,
so why? oh please babe, tell me why, would you want to wind up dead?

Reviews

[Bala Gorthi]

It is really a sad spot to be in. You have very well brought your concern, anguish and agony one goes when one's close persons takes such a decision.
I wish the depressed ones realise that there are people who love and care for them in their weak moments.
Thanks for sharing this beautiful write Cimmy.

[cimmy wuv xxxooo]

Awwww thanks for the awesome review. Yes he has tonz of support and love, from allot of people.
read moreAwwww thanks for the awesome review. Yes he has tonz of support and love, from allot of people.
Thanks again for the review.

[cycy]

speaking from experience, its not like you dont want to be with your loved ones anymore but sometimes all of life is just too much to bear. you just want everything to stop. you just need silence, peace, nothing to think about anymore. its way more than just feeling sad or depressed, its feeling like there is just no other way to make it all go away, but it really does hurt to think of leaving your loved ones behind and causing them so much pain. people always say why didnt you talk to someone etc but its not always so easy, sometimes you dont even know what to say or what you are feeling.

[cimmy wuv xxxooo]

Yer I can get that. And I know he certainly wasnt in the right headspace at the moment. I'm sorry you relate hun and hope things get better for you.

[Coyote Poetry]

I lost two brothers to suicide. Suicide is a quiet death. Some people just decide and do. Both my bothers left without note or reason for us to understand.
"Bloody knife beside you, you laying still on the ground,
I called out to you in panic, but you didn't make a sound.
Until i went up closer, to see you shiver and shake,
I breathed in a sigh of relief, knowing you where awake."
I like the meaning and the reason for the poem. We must pay attention to the people. We love. Thank you dear friend for sharing the powerful words.
Coyote

[cimmy wuv xxxooo]

Im extremely sorry that happened to u. Thats horrible :(
Thanks so much for the review coyote. Be blessed xxx

[Coyote Poetry]

You are welcome.

[Dr. YumnaKay]

This was a really heart touching poem for me to read. It's not easy when you go through a situation like that and to pen it down too. But I like how you still managed to rhyme to give it a good flow.
Well penned.

[cimmy wuv xxxooo]

Thanks so much. The more of an emotional experience the easier to write down.

[Dr. YumnaKay]

True..
You're welcome 😊😊

[Joey Nizz]

Oh wow.. that's one strong write with powerful words, as i was reading i actually saw what was going through these words.
You captured it and i saw it.
Well wrote.

[cimmy wuv xxxooo]

I see it all the time in flashbacks.... unwanted ones.
Thanks for the review :)

[Joey Nizz]

We all have those.. well some of us do.
Your welcome :)

[Paul]

Such a sad experience. I'm sorry you had to go through this. The poem was beautifully written.

[cimmy wuv xxxooo]

Thanks allot Paul. :)

[Najam Us Saher]

This is very heart touching poem. I liked the way you gathered up yourself to write this poem.

[cimmy wuv xxxooo]

Thank you :)

[Najam Us Saher]

You're welcome. ☺

[writ rajat]

sorry for your experience but nine rhymes

[cimmy wuv xxxooo]

Thank you times 2 :)

[writ rajat]

i will rate it nine

[cimmy wuv xxxooo]

thankz :) :)

[Anjali]

This is really sad, but on the other hand, it's so beautiful, as well. I'm only gonna say that be strong and there's gonna be sunshine. By the way, amazing write!

[cimmy wuv xxxooo]

ill continue to wait for the sunshine.
Thank you for your review :)

[Anjali]

Your welcome!

[LKBillips]

Heartbreaking and scary, but a powerful write none the less. The editor in me see a few spelling errors...You "were" confused... You "were" quiet..
going through "a lot".... and "there's" so many questions....
It doesn't take away from the meaning or vibe, just some things that stick out in my grammatical mind

[cimmy wuv xxxooo]

Thank you for your review. I will try to get around to fixing my grammar.

[cimmy wuv xxxooo]

is that better?

[LKBillips]

Wow you're fast. it didn't need the quotation marks but yes all better. Hope I helped. :)

[cimmy wuv xxxooo]

I wasn't if you meant for me to put those in haha.
they look alright though right? can't be stuffed changing it again.
Yer thanks for that.
I got sick of people commenting on the grammar thought id fix it for once haha.

[cimmy wuv xxxooo]

I wasn't sure sorry

[LKBillips]

yeah they look kind of cool. Makes those sentences more dramatic. :)

[cimmy wuv xxxooo]

haha ill keep em in then aeee :P