pronouns of posture in an October light

pronouns of posture in an October light

the hue

of you

is the hymn

of me

sung by the her 

in my heart

as autumn unfolds

the folds

of us.

erin-cilberto

10/4/15

Reviews

[rubie]

this is so beautiful in its simplicity.

"sung by the her in my heart..." i love that.

this one seems to tumble down the page, as autumn leaves tumble from the trees....

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind review, rubie.

j.

[m.s.early]

the simpleness of your words. Its elegance is in its conciseness. with the punctuation and the physical structure, event the signature looks like poetry

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind review, x.

j.

[Autumn Lyric]

"as autumn unfolds/ the folds of us"...love this line; very nice work!

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your words, LsShaye,
j.

[Alfred Kukitz]

I knew a smile would find my face. The titles lends itself to wonder and delight and the pleasure of reading runs all along with the sweetness of humor. NICE JACOB!

Regards,
Al

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind review, Al.

j.

[gabrielle]

awww! i do love this to the core. super smiling here. nice one jacob :) :) :)

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your very kind words, gabrielle.

j.

[Nusquam Esse]

I was curious about the 'pronouns'; and this short piece drew quite a smile from me. I really like the clever rhymes, word play, and your 'hidden' pronoun'. This is particularly fun to recite aloud. Yet despite the more enjoyable aspects of this, I am left pondering the significance of unfolding the folds of 'us'. So many ways these few words can be envisioned; which one is 'most' true at this moment?

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your words, Nusquam...

j.