free will

free will

 

 

 

split wings,

early Angels fathom

the escalating up and down

 

the good guys wore uniforms

of white clouds,

the soft billowy touch against

a blue canvas

 

while the bad guys dressed

in storm clouds,

dark reflections in symphony

with off key violins

and pounding drums,

sounding the insolent beats

of negativity,

 

and once the fray was unleashed

the sky settled into a dominant

grayish hue

and some scattered patches of blue

 

leaving us with split conscience

and a pallet of colors

with which to paint the sky

 

as our own wings determine.

 

erin-cilberto

1/1/16

Reviews

[daninstockholm]

I read once, I believe it was Muriel Rukeyser, but not sure, that while she was teaching poetry writing at the University, she would get many many requests from students and others to read their work. She said that she could ALWAYS tell which people had read poetry actively and which ones hadn't, because their work lacked an apparent technique and depth. You, obviously, do not suffer from that limitation. Your technique and ability with language and the imagery of poetry is top notch. Excellent work!

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your very kind words, dan.

j.

[David Scott]

I must have seen this and subconsciously been led to write. I actually wrote a poem this week called "Free Will"... Common topic however. I assure you it was not plagiarized. Anyhow, we went in totally different direction. I guess we can choose to define free will however we want to? ha.
I felt the effort here to make good on the opportunities.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your words, David...and i would never consider you in the same breath with plagiarism...you are unique in your voice---

thank you,
j.

[David Scott]

Awesome! I was accused once... but crazy is what crazy is... Ha.

[softlyfall]

Which you have done, you have painted the good/evil symbiosis/juxtaposition perfectly for a modern poet's world.
It's has frenetic movement with an undercurrent of knowing, like a vanGogh

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind review, softlyfall.

j.

[Sameer]

The sky and clouds say more then what you have to say...what is hidden...inside. wounderful the symphony of universe this poem is..great work.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind words, Sameer.

j.

[Cryingkate]

You successfully created Much imagery that I truly enjoyed.
I saw several grand famous paintings of Angelic beings, including those cast out.

I saw the scarab (symbolic of the left brain and right brain) Also meaning the mind of God and mind of man consciousness.
Yes ... we have choice/free will to choose.
Again..... We have the choice to see our lives through either the physical world or Spiritual world, things as they seem to be or by the things we cannot see,with our physical eyes, but our third eye. Eye of the Spirit body.
I enjoyed the reminder through this write.
Your choice to use: 'as our own wings determine" is a physical description contrast with the free choice being a mental action. That says to me that not only do we choose free will choices by thought but, we choose by action... how we live our life.

I also enjoyed learning something new... I thought you had mistaken the spelling of (fray) I always spelled it (frey) a quick check and I was able to catch something I never had before.
http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/fray
Very fun write to work the mind through and, colorful images

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind review...filled with such keen insights...my friend.
j.

[icelandicblue]

The color presented does not always portray intent. I like the grayish area of this poem. It is where most of life happens.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your words, Anne.

j.

[Connie]

You are an incredible writer, I really enjoyed this

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind words, Connie.

j.

[Jimmy Yetts]

Words that paint; images that tell.
A lovely perspective that yields profound perceptions.
Exceptional work, Jacob of the Carbondale Clan!

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you, Jimmy,
j.

[Elwyn]

If only it was this easy to tell the good guys from the bad guys. If only there was such a thing as a "bad guy" or a "good guy". Unfortunately we're all just shades of grey but it makes life infinitely more interesting. Beautiful, as always, as always.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your words, Elwyn...
j.
always appreciate your visits.

[jesserose99]

I love your work Jacob...I was just thinking about free will and how there is so much pain in the world...and how the only way we can't blame god for sooo much hate is free will. It is our own bed we must lie in. Both a gift and a curse. I love the image of a pallet of colors because isn't that what we all are, just that, not black or white...somewhere in the middle because of our very nature. Amazing thought provoking words!

[jacob erin-cilberto]

yes, somewhere in the middle...thank you for your very kind review, jesserose,

j.