constructing heart

constructing heart

A Poem by jacob erin-cilberto


constructing heart

 

 

 

not your typical poet,

more an engineer type

thinks in equations, measurements

 

autonomous in nature,

thinks balance is procured with a level

 

(and level head),

 

his ink is an oil spill

on pure paper white

a blotch of sense

captured in rigid form

 

an anal retentive bath

of words

tidying up the bones

so everything is in its place

 

not your typical poet,

his slide rule mind

sees black and white description

he's a metaphor's antagonist

a haiku hindrance

personification's poltergeist

 

moving marvels of objects

throughout his works

with a pulley of strained semantics

fitting everything into its place

 

except feelings.

 

 

 

 

 

erin-cilberto

1/9/16

© 2016 jacob erin-cilberto


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Featured Review

>his ink is an oil spill
on pure paper white
a blotch of sense
captured in rigid form<

An oil spill is inimical to life - so this poet's poems are not just measure by perhaps slick in a deadening way?
A blotch of sense captured in rigid form - sounded like a Rorschach test - feelings interpreted on algorithms?

A vivid picture is painted in your poem - and it feels just right.


Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

jacob erin-cilberto

8 Years Ago

thank you for your kind review, Solar.
j.



Reviews

dear Jacob, having been a Patent and Trademark
Secretary in a large Intellectual Property law firm
in Washinton, D.C. for eight years, I can relate to your
poem, since I worked for a patent attorney who specialized
in engineering. His methodical words were mesmerizing to type
in order to prepare specifications for the patent in
minute details. He would love to read your poem.
He had a great sense of humor which I am certain was his
saving grace, and mine. truly, Pat

Posted 8 Years Ago


jacob erin-cilberto

8 Years Ago

thank you for your kind words, Pat...and if you share the poem with him, let me know what he says..... read more
Patricia Wedel

8 Years Ago

Hi Jacob... He was a bachelor and finally married
the only gal he ever loved after her first.. read more
jacob erin-cilberto

8 Years Ago

thank you!
Isn't it strange that the one thing we find most important tends to be the hardest to master? The more work from you I read the more daring I become with my own! Many thanks!!

Posted 8 Years Ago


jacob erin-cilberto

8 Years Ago

Daring is good, yes...thank you for your words, Scott...

j.
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V
I like it. I like the term "not (your) typical poet", the descriptions/thoughts of it.

Posted 8 Years Ago


jacob erin-cilberto

8 Years Ago

thank you, mimi...
j.
The cold, calculating mind of a dramatist no doubt...this guy ended up writing screenplays for CSI on the network. (laughing) But what is a poet without feeling? Certainly NOT a poet. I remember Miss Dickinson's definition of poetry...“If I read a book and it makes my whole body so cold no fire can warm me I know that is poetry. If I feel physically as if the top of my head were taken off, I know that is poetry. These are the only way I know it. Is there any other way?” I would have to say I agree..a good poem will not only entertain the reader but make them "feel" something...I have read some "poetry" that lacked feeling...it had form and nicely arranged quatrains...it had archaic phrases with thee and thou and whenst...it had pedantic usage and "hundred dollar words"...but it lacked communication of our most common human trait...feeling; emotion, that fire which rages in the boiling heart of genius. It's sad really when such effort goes into the show but it lacks heart...you are always a pleasure to read my friend.

Posted 8 Years Ago


jacob erin-cilberto

8 Years Ago

yes, i love those quotes by Emily, my favorite poet...thank you for your words, Fabian,

read more
Sorry Jacob, maybe l didn't express
myself correctly, sometimes when
Engineering works out correctly
that can be just as gratifying as
Writing anything ..


Posted 8 Years Ago


jacob erin-cilberto

8 Years Ago

my dad was engineer for 35 years...i hear ya, paddy....his outlet, mathematical...mine words...
read more
Wow, that so reminds me of
my brother who has his own
engineering business, l work
with him sometimes And Jacob
You have hit the nail on the head
Great work as always....

Posted 8 Years Ago


damn Jacob, now you tell me!!! I am going to have to give up my level and slide rule, no wonder I am still all by myself, no ink spills and blots... well if the tin man got a heart, and the lion got courage, the straw man got a brain maybe there is hope for me too... but I am not going to Oz, nope I coming to you Jacob for those ink blots and feelings, cause your poems are always loaded with them... and I appreciate every little drip of metaphor

redzone

Posted 8 Years Ago


jacob erin-cilberto

8 Years Ago

thank you for your kind review, Curt...and yes, i think that tin man does have a heart.

read more
Jacob, you always steer your readers to a finale of perfection where they sit amazed :) Inspiring and potent :)

Posted 8 Years Ago


jacob erin-cilberto

8 Years Ago

thank you for your words, Poppy,
j.
That is the cold hard truth. The structure is nice but where are the feelings, it's just a box. Nice one Jacob. I loved how you did that.

Posted 8 Years Ago


jacob erin-cilberto

8 Years Ago

thank you for your words, A hare.

j.
Beautiful, " with a pulley of strained semantics fitting everything into its place" well said...Erin...surely a " blotch of sense"

Posted 8 Years Ago


jacob erin-cilberto

8 Years Ago

thank you, Sameer.

j.

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Added on January 9, 2016
Last Updated on January 9, 2016

Author

jacob erin-cilberto
jacob erin-cilberto

Carbondale, IL



About
Originally from Bronx, NY, I live in Carbondale, Illinois...teach English at a community college and have been writing and publishing poetry since 1970. I am here to read for inspiration from other po.. more..

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