coming in second

coming in second

 

 

trivia of a heart's reckoning

your voice was one of the questions

i remembered hearing it once

but couldn't quite identify the source

 

i could embrace a smile in my mind

your eyes reminded me of a name

but i couldn't come up with it in time

and too soon, my memory bled into

 

a thousand answers,

none a strong enough image

to roll off my tongue

when it really mattered

to the outcome of us.

 

 

 

erin-cilberto

8/28/16

Reviews

[Inject Positivity]

This is how memories are, they are keep on getting written in our mind's pages but the problem is that with time they slip away from us and even if we one day try to find them they seem blurry in our inner eyes... A very thought provoking write... I can relate to it very much...

Sincerely
Dhiman

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for relating to this little poem, Dhiman...

j.

[Corset]

it has yet to be determined, sucks when you can't get a clear pic

[jacob erin-cilberto]

so true, thanks Corset...

j.

[Lyn Anderson]

Too little too late, words unsaid can lead to regret.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you, KL...

j.

[Shabeeh Haider]

At times memories become blurred. Or do we try to blur those thoughts?
Whatever it is, the memories do not go.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your words, Shabeeh.
j.

[Carolynn]

I woke up this morning thinking about fuzzy memories that weren't quite coming into focus so I totally relate to this - quite happy to know others suffer the same dilemma :)

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for relating to this poem, Carolynn.

j.

[Vatsal Rohilla (account..]

It is astounding how memories of the past just slip away like that- becoming fainter and fainter everyday. They are quite like a waning moon- which keeps on decreasing till one can't see it- the difference being that we have our moon back, but we rarely have our memories back. Really great. Had a sudden outburst of appreciation for your work after reading the fourth line.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you, Vatsal.

j.

[Lydia Shutter]

Ah, the brain and the heart have many compartments and sometimes the memories are a bit blurred. That can be a problem. Trivia can make or break a relationship. Great metaphor. Lydi**

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you, Lydi...appreciate your words...

j.

[andrew mitchell]

a great write i felt like you were remembering a past love captured in a moment but the name would not roll off the tongue, like who was she!!

[jacob erin-cilberto]

we try to forget some...but they stay in our minds....

thank you, andrew.
j.

[Alfred Kukitz]

Hit or miss theology, one of many choices rambling through alleyways of heart and mind, drifting into the science of confusion, always thinking what more could be said but words following sciences dictum.

Regards,
Al

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind review, Al..

j.

[emmajoy]

Your final stanza says so much, is a book of its own.. a mystery for sure, a romance uncertain.

You've captured the vague yet visual moment when the memory's there but veiled with what's passed in the interim. A strange feeling that... a sadness and mystery at the same time and one that niggles at the mind.. returning to haunt just a bit.. but often.

Your writing is always that little different, enigmatic, pensive, off.plain. So it lends itself to thought and in in this case a little private hint of what was or might have been . That's what writing can do, beckon but not wholly reveal... and you've done that very finely.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you, emma....

j.

[emmajoy]

I can but try though - know i often get things wrong.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

there is no right or wrong with poetry...once the poet lets readers read their work, it belongs to the readers to interpret as they will.

j.