conclusions never finished

conclusions never finished

A Poem by jacob erin-cilberto


conclusions never finished


i carved your initials
into my desk, under the pad, under the ink blot
under my heart
into the skin of my perusing

even though you were using
me
to put your ego on a pedestal
where you feel most comfortable

i wrote epic poems of unrequited love
as you wrote Pulitzer worthy "see you later" notes
and left them on the kitchen table
tucked neatly under the salt shaker
you used to pour insult into the wound

once again... a single place setting

i spun my coffee cup
twirled the spilled mocha
with my thumb and forefinger
singed with the pain
matched only by that in my heart

the stanzas lengthened 
your goodbye notes got shorter
my sense of security burned in the toaster
with the bread i forgot was put down twice

now i had been, thrice
black toast
black ops 
love in virtual vulnerability
my words splayed upon a screen

they all saw you leaving
felt my pain
shed a tear or two for me

and then panned my poem
more often than any 49'er panned for gold

the coffee chilled
the last note said "gone"

and inadvertently i remembered
i wrote it myself

as a postscript 
to the epic poem i never finished
just partially scrawled
on imagined parchment

made out of napkin memory
soaked with the tears i breathe.


erin-cilberto
2/26/17

© 2017 jacob erin-cilberto



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Reviews

Hard to let go of unfinished business in the matters of the heart even though the ocean is full we seem reluctant to try the new and keep the catch we hooked.

Posted 1 Week Ago


jacob erin-cilberto

1 Week Ago

thank you, andrew.
j.
I don't think I have read about a broken heart so deeply in a while...the masterful way this is written really hits home and renders me still...leaves such a lonely chill in my bones and yet such an appreciation for your writing, amazing Jacob :)

Posted 7 Months Ago


jacob erin-cilberto

7 Months Ago

thank you for your kind review, Poppy.
j.
Gosh.
Reading this I have one thing to say, and that is: wow. I really have a long way to go and much to improve on.
" i wrote epic poems of unrequited love
as you wrote Pulitzer worthy "see you later" notes
and left them on the kitchen table
tucked neatly under the salt shaker
you used to pour insult into the wound "
That stanza in particular blew me away in the way it solidifies the desperate motive of the poem.
Thank you for this read. I thoroughly enjoyed it!
-Threads


Posted 7 Months Ago


jacob erin-cilberto

7 Months Ago

thank you for your kind words, Threads.

j.
when i was in high school i learned and would recite Walter Benton's "This is My Beloved". I mean, The entire book from cover to cover. It was all the rage then since Lawrence Harvey and Arthur Prysock had both made albums of this verse. But I never got to use it...I mean, no women wanted me to recite it to her....I mention this because the third and forth stanza's here launched my memory back to those days of unrequited, yet unfulfilled romance. You Jacob either could read my 17 year old mind or you and me were the same person of different parents. Whatever...

you're a master......dana

Posted 7 Months Ago


jacob erin-cilberto

7 Months Ago

we might have been the same...we seem to think on like wavelengths...quite often...
thank you.. read more
A virtual mini-movie powerfully portraying lost love.
Many of us have co-starred in similar productions; few conveyed by such award-winning writing.
Bravo, author!

Posted 7 Months Ago


jacob erin-cilberto

7 Months Ago

you are very kind, Jimmy...

thank you,

j.
Each succulent metaphor reveals the sorrowful tale, like singular strokes of the brass rubber's charcoal on paper over a monument, here Jacob.
That we end up filling in the gaps - writing on their behalf in efforts to understand - is the job of the broken-hearted.
Brilliantly moving poem.

Posted 7 Months Ago


jacob erin-cilberto

7 Months Ago

thank you for your very kind review, Tony.
j.
I loved the extended metaphors and how one stanza seemed to bleed into the other. Another favorite for me

Posted 7 Months Ago


jacob erin-cilberto

7 Months Ago

thank you for your very kind review, Julia.
j.
Oh been there. Went away and came back to do it again. What I always enjoy in your work Jacob is how you take a universal thought, truth, occurence and make it art.

Posted 7 Months Ago


jacob erin-cilberto

7 Months Ago

that is a really kind compliment, Ken...appreciate that you feel the work has merit.

.. read more
LOVE! LOVE! LOVE! This is one of the best of yours I've read so far! I love the way your overall message is extended into a story-like expression of so many feelings & observations. I love the excellent play on words in so many places, in so many ways, & all with awesome congruity.

(I've been gone from this website awhile & I've missed reading you! This is a great place to return to & enjoy your poetry!)

Posted 7 Months Ago


jacob erin-cilberto

7 Months Ago

thank you for your very kind words, my friend.
j.
I love this write, one of your very best. I am putting it into my favorites. Valentine

Posted 7 Months Ago


jacob erin-cilberto

7 Months Ago

thank you for your kind review, Kathie..

j.

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Added on February 27, 2017
Last Updated on February 27, 2017

Author

jacob erin-cilberto
jacob erin-cilberto

Carbondale, IL



About
Originally from Bronx, NY, I live in Carbondale, Illinois...teach English at two community colleges and have been writing and publishing poetry since 1970. Friending works two ways. If we have had .. more..

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