the trifles of being

the trifles of being

 

 

crumbling leaves

will never savor autumn breezes

they curl up and die

inside the womb of late summer

 

static culprit

of wet heat 

intimidates 

 

but the rain is like a kidnapped dream

held for a ransom never paid

and victim petal

bound and gagged on solemn branch

finds rescue in burnt grass

a pyre of elegant eulogy

 

then is scarcely remembered

at first frost.

 

 

erin-cilberto

8/19/17

Reviews

[lightsong]

The whole poem is impressive, but the first verse caught me most, I've read the poem again and again, if leaves can't taste the breeze but only feel it, yearning to the rain which can fill each little cell of it... tasting, drinking to the roots... aren't we speaking too of our selves? the Irony of life and fate? we seek what isn't in our hands, and dream of what isn't around us, maybe we don't know how to appreciate and enjoy what we have, what it's around us, so we might get to that dream...

The leaves must learn that to feel is also to taste, but not with tongues, but with hearts.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your insightful words, Light...
j.

[Tony Jordan]

Never eat the yellow snow they told us when we were wee toddlers.
But later we made the yellow snow !! We wrote our names in pee as teenagers on the virgin snow because we were so 'awesome' !!
And in the morning it was gone.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

ha ha ha..."watch out where the huskies go, and don't you eat that yellow snow" (frank zappa)
thanks Tony....

[Lydia Shutter]

There is something about this line, "the rain is like a kidnapped dream" that was magical to me, Jacob. Are we forgotten as we age? Do we become afterthoughts? Unfortunately, all too often that is the case. Not sure if that is what you were going for with the metaphor, but it is what I got out of it. Lydi**

[jacob erin-cilberto]

i really like what you took from this piece, Lydi....

thank you....

j.

[John Alexander McFadyen]

The first stanza is immaculate! It's portrayal of the changing season is so colourful and full of metaphoric brilliance as it describes the aging process. Another poem full to the brim with pathos!

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind words, John.
j.

[Einstein Noodle]

something to sink ones teeth into, this is ...images are profound and a bit bleak ..we have a tree in the front that does not loose its leaves until spring, when new ones push the old out ..they turn brown in the fall but remain on the branches ..tenaciously clinging .. i cut that tree down a week ago and yesterday st the pyre to glow ;) the richness of metaphor and deeper life meaning i read in this one make it a favorite ... scarcely remembered indeed .. these days even the very old and famous have been loosing their identities eh!? re-written and forgotten no doubt :(
E.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

yes, new ones pushing the old ones out....thank you for your kind review, E.
j.

[Sami Khalil]

Very sad and true about the little things or small values in life. Scarcely remembered and appreciated. Marvelous is your pen which lives...:)..................

[jacob erin-cilberto]

you are very kind, Sami....
j.

[Sami Khalil]

You too. You are welcome. ...:::))))

[DIVYA]

The first verse just took my breath away with its sheer beaity of imagery.

Nature is cruel sometimes in that it advances swiftly and doesn't leave scope for remembrances (for lack of a better word coming to my mind) and so is life!

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your words, DIVYA..
j.

[DIVYA]

You are welcome :)

[Surya]

True it is....scarcely remembered at first frost....I loved it...:)

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind words, Surya.
j.