Food for thought

Food for thought

A Story by Snow Angel

I've heard or read somewhere that you must write what you know to avoid writers block. So, I'm going to give it a try. I sincerely apologize for those who may take the time to read this because my thoughts are like scrambled eggs. I am an amateur. I'm not going to lie about that. I used to be creative and wrote stories to no end without worry. After years of judgement I have filtered a lot and have started worrying that my work is not good enough. It has come to a point where I don't care anymore. I don't seem to care about anything but at the same time it seems like I do.

 I'm stuck in a depression. I am surrounded by people who are depressed and can't find a way out. I've tried bring light into others lives and hoped that others would do the same for me but I was sadly mistaken. Now I'm stuck in my own hell with my own negative thoughts and I want to be in a better state of mind. I strive to be in a better state of mind because I can't enjoy anything that I used to. 

I've heard somewhere that when you are in a depression the best first step is to find out why your're really depressed. I know why I'm depressed and there doesn't to be any solutions. I've been told before that if you work hard life will reap the fruits to happiness but in all reality I've noticed that I've been working hard to avoid things from getting worse. To find out the second I stop working hard that life gets worse. I've noticed you lose more than you gain and that has lead to question the meaning of life. I know things can be worse. Things can always get worse. Things can also get better but its always seems to be a sad short experience. 

I have also heard you have to earn friendships and respect from others. That may be true but that one time you fail it seems to disappear into thin air. I then wonder will anyone ever have as much patience as I do with them. I question what is the point of trying. The answer always seems to be the same. To avoid things from getting worse than they already are. I enjoy conversations and to hear others view points on any topic. Even if I may not agree I still hold interest on a persons opinion. I've noticed I like to find out why to questions even if I might not get a definite answer.  I feel way to different compared to other people. It makes me feel alone. It makes me feel empty when others don't take time to get to know me better. I am writing all of this to get my head straight and understand myself better. I would like to know if there are others who think similar to the way I do. 

I've read things online on how to get out of a depression. It suggests you do things even though you don't want to. I took the advice. I tided up my room and I keep things clean a lot more often. I read a chapter of a book even though I struggle to pay attention because of my wandering mind. I went for a walk to the store to buy something. I do some exercises. I don't enjoy any of these things but after awhile of doing it I did experience that I have a little bit of a stronger tolerance then I used to. I guess what I really want to know if someone else has been in this mindset before and what did they do to accomplish to get out of it and move into a better mindset. I constantly search for guidance and it seems to be know where to be found. 

© 2017 Snow Angel



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Featured Review

I feel what you're saying SA. In my own experiences I've found that happiness comes from within and not from the outside world. I think the key is to not let negative energy from the outside bring you down, depression begins and feeds on negative energy.
Find things you love to do and occupy your time with positive activities. Happiness begins and feeds on positive energy...stay positive.
Writing always helps of course, release negative feelings and simultaneously learn more about yourself.
Life is what we make it, stay strong and never give up, life can be a wonderful thing if we make it...

Posted 3 Weeks Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

Life is sometimes harder for creative people, I think. We're more in touch with our surroundings and not oblivious like others. We're more sensitive. I'm saying these things because your words ring familiar. I wish I could give you a ticket out of your situation. Being almost seventy and having survived dark periods, I can tell you that things do get better, though sometimes too darn slowly. Do what you have to to stand strong and be yourself. Be a survivor. That's my advice, for what it's worth.

Posted 1 Week Ago


Life is sometimes harder for creative people, I think. We're more in touch with our surroundings and not oblivious like others. We're more sensitive. I'm saying these things because your words ring familiar. I wish I could give you a ticket out of your situation. Being almost seventy and having survived dark periods, I can tell you that things do get better, though sometimes too darn slowly. Do what you have to to stand strong and be yourself. Be a survivor. That's my advice, for what it's worth.

Posted 1 Week Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

I feel what you're saying SA. In my own experiences I've found that happiness comes from within and not from the outside world. I think the key is to not let negative energy from the outside bring you down, depression begins and feeds on negative energy.
Find things you love to do and occupy your time with positive activities. Happiness begins and feeds on positive energy...stay positive.
Writing always helps of course, release negative feelings and simultaneously learn more about yourself.
Life is what we make it, stay strong and never give up, life can be a wonderful thing if we make it...

Posted 3 Weeks Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Food for thought. Although I don't think I'm that hungry. Thank you very much!

Posted 1 Month Ago


I've always found the most important thing is to just keep going. Even if your writing isn't perfect, having something written is better than letting writer's block eat you. Another good thing to do is what you've done here: dump out your thoughts. It can be a cathartic experience and clear your mind. Good luck! I know you can kick this thing.

Posted 1 Month Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Snow Angel

1 Month Ago

Thank you :)
Each one of us has to find the pathway out of depression & writers block, but I'll tell ya mine . . . listening to music makes me want to write & doing exercise helps me shake off depression. I read a writers book a long time ago that suggested writing "morning pages" -- 3 pages to dump out all this yukky feeling (like you're doing here) & then it sort of clears your pipeline for other more creative thoughts & ideas to come. Here's hoping you find your way out of this darkness, becuz you clearly have many important things to share in your writing (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

Posted 1 Month Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Snow Angel

1 Month Ago

Thank you. You are a sweetheart :)
Great attempt to pour out the feelings that bothers you, I started writing in the same way. Trust me one really feels better when they write.

Posted 1 Month Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

I need good song and reading. Reading does make me want to write. I read the ancient writers and poets to be able to create mainly. Ben Jonson, Donne, Dryden and the old words. I enjoyed your words and thoughts today my friend.
Coyote

Posted 1 Month Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Snow Angel

1 Month Ago

Thank you for taking the time to read and review. I always enjoy the comments you leave.
Coyote Poetry

1 Month Ago

Was my pleasure and you are welcome.
your work is as good as any bodies,we are all amateurs,if it comes from the heart it is always great

Posted 1 Month Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Snow Angel

1 Month Ago

Thank you :)
 wordman

1 Month Ago

you`re welcome,,

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Added on October 22, 2017
Last Updated on October 22, 2017

Author

Snow Angel
Snow Angel

Toms River, NJ



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