Waiting for LOVE

Waiting for LOVE

A Poem by ferousfinite


Waiting for Love


Hearts afar and truth behold,

The Life of one man,

From young to old.


A test, one mind, heart and hand

Warm hearts once cold.

He watches and there He stand,


In the doorway of time so bold.

The Life of one man,

Awaiting her word to be told.


© 2014 ferousfinite



Author's Note

ferousfinite
One of my Best! What do you think?

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I read the second line as, "Hearts afar and truth be told." Just a thought. There is something about "A test one mind heart and hand" which I am not reading well. Perhaps some punctuation at that point might help the reader along. Other than that, overall, there are points at which I might suggest making sure your subjects and verbs agree AND a really odd passive voice towards the end.

I love the sentiment and agree with the tone. Composed well, nice word choice. Just needs some tidying up, perhaps.

Posted 3 Years Ago


ferousfinite

3 Years Ago

Revised. =)
ferousfinite

3 Years Ago

I was actually waiting to finish this one and now its done! Enjoy!
This is lovely. The last few lines are quite powerful and a great ending to this wonderful little gem.

:) Julie

Posted 3 Years Ago


This piece is about asking your higher power to grant you love. There is a reality here, for us all.

Posted 3 Years Ago


Yeh .. it's really one of the best write of yours. Nice write, I liked the depth of the poem. Well penned.

Posted 4 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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5 Reviews
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Added on October 25, 2013
Last Updated on March 4, 2014
Tags: Romance

Author

ferousfinite
ferousfinite

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