The Goddess in the Bar

The Goddess in the Bar

A Story by Richard McLin
"

A man finds his soulmate, but can her secret derail his plans.

"
He glanced her on the other side of the bar, and to say he was instantly smitten would be an understatement. She was the most beautiful thing, and not just in that bar. He attempted to make his way to her. Navigating through the drunks and the dregs was going to be worth it. As he got closer and closer to her his heart was beating faster.
She had dark skin, dark brown hair, and her eyes matched both. Her skin looked smooth, and quite pleasing to the touch, but he knew he was getting ahead of himself, and just focused on actually meeting her.
She gave him a smile as he made it to his destination, and she spoke first, in a deep, somewhat flinty voice.
"Hello, my name is Amanda."

Her steely words, and goddess like mannerisms made it hard for him to understand English, but his brain soon unscrambled her words. Sadly it decided to scramble his.
"I'm Pugo Hooley."
She laughed at his awkwardness.
"Hugo Pooley." He corrected.

She tossed her beautiful hair from side to side, and it moved as if in slow motion. Giving him time to look at her features.
Her gorgeous hair,
Silky flawless skin,
Dark endless eyes,
and her enormous Adams Apple...


The End

Richard McLin 2018

© 2018 Richard McLin


Author's Note

Richard McLin
Came to mind while listening to "Funky Cold Medina". I choose to leave the ending sort of up in the air. Did he go over there knowing that it was indeed a man? I decided to leave that up to the reader. Is it a trick ending, there for humor reasons, or is this a modern love story? I want to hear your interpretations...

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Reviews

OH NO heheh...well,..hmmm This just made me smile. Nice you.

Posted 5 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

That almost happened to me once she was drop dead gorgeous. But, before I could blunder through the crowd another drunk reached her table. I can still hear her words to him in a rumbling baritone. "Bug off mother f****r" she said. So I dodged a bullet, I hate rude behavior in a person.

Posted 5 Years Ago


This is basically the elegant version of that one Eazy E song lol. Funny a greatly worded.

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Richard McLin

6 Years Ago

Thank you for your review.
lol,found u a drag queen huh ! just screws up your whole day

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Richard McLin

6 Years Ago

Lol thank you for the review.
 wordman

6 Years Ago

my pleasure
intriguing. you have a way of capturing human tension in your writing. you characterizations are so true-to-life. this grips and holds. great song you mention by the way ...

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Richard McLin

6 Years Ago

Thanks man.
You do like twists to your writings !!!

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Richard McLin

6 Years Ago

I do like twists, unless it doesn't flow naturally. I can't add one just for the hell of it. This on.. read more
Sometimes we meet people that steal our hearts and it’s intense attraction at first sight- maybe a lost connection of times gone by- people return sometimes to teach us and hopefully that soulmate who’s meant to return will stay for good- what a wonderful connection that can be shared by two- if you never follow your intuition you’ll never know what’s meant to and what’s not- wonderful picture painted here🌹

Posted 6 Years Ago


Was not expecting that and I hope to hear more of it beacuase to me it reads like a modern love story. I would like to see more of their relationship. Good work!!!

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Richard McLin

6 Years Ago

I might. It’s an area I have not tackled that might be interesting.
Richard McLin

5 Years Ago

I have actually decided to try to flesh this out and make it a full on book.
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.
The ending had me shocked!!!!!!! I love the humor and the flow of the story with the bar setting. I loved to read more on this story actually.

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Richard McLin

6 Years Ago

Thank you for the review. I look forward to checking out your work.
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BBP
Hahahaha love the ending... and the bar setting was laid out perfectly! Fun read.

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Richard McLin

6 Years Ago

Thank you. I had to repost cause I accidentally erased it. I'm still bummed over it. I appreciate th.. read more

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Stats

555 Views
10 Reviews
Rating
Added on March 16, 2018
Last Updated on March 16, 2018
Tags: Bar, Soulmate, soul, mate, dating, sex, man, woman, fiction

Author

Richard McLin
Richard McLin

Salem, OR



About
I have been writing ever since I can remember. I can't live and not write, it's as essential as breath. more..

Writing