Silent Beauty

Silent Beauty

A Story by Richard McLin

Three friends go to an abandoned house at night to participate in an event.


              The car pulled up just a tad after eleven thirty in the evening. This pleased its occupants; it meant they were making good time. Cold air and fog greeted them as they opened the vehicles doors and began to emerge from its steel body. The house they had all agreed to use was shrouded in both as well, as though it was an active participant in their actions, and in some ways maybe it was.

                Manfred, the man who had just previously called home to the passenger side back seat, wrapped his jacket around his little traveling companion. He did not want the cold air to bother him. With Manfred were the driver Derek and his girlfriend Leslie. Leslie motioned that they had to go round to the back of the house. Derek quickly popped the trunk and removed the picnic basket.

                Though it was nearly midnight the lonely moon provided enough light to guide them round the house. In the backyard they discovered the dead relics of someone’s previous life. An old swing set next to what appeared to be a dog house.

                She walked up the stairs and unlocked the door. Next to the house was Derek, and still he had the picnic basket clutched in his arms. Manfred made his way but was halted by Derek. Manfred looked over and could see Leslie, the moonlight through the windows made her shine as she began to remove her clothing. He looked back over at Derek and nodded in understanding. Derek shut the door, and Manfred made his way to the abandoned swing set.

                The mountains were black, as though the dark sky simply consumed them into darkness, and in a way he felt that the same was happening to them. He removed the bag of water from his jacket which contained Percy, his fish. He had told Percy of their intentions, and Percy seemed to understand. Manfred had owned Percy for some time now, and Percy had been elevated in Manfred’s mind as being much more than a pet, he was a friend. Percy did not want to be left out of what was about to occur. He wanted to stay with Manfred, he wanted to help Manfred.

                Now well past midnight a light from behind had begun to disturb Manfred. It was Derek with a flashlight. He motioned for Manfred to come into the house. As Manfred walked slowly up the stairs he stopped when he got to Derek. Derek put his hand on Manfred’s shoulder and a tear began to fall down his left cheek. Manfred leaned over and kissed the tear from his friends face. Manfred handed Percy to Derek, and walked into the house shutting both friends outside. Manfred stepped into the living room area and looked over at Leslie. She lay on a blanket, in the middle of the room. Light made the sweat on her naked body shine. Manfred began to remove his clothes as she lit a cigarette.

                She smoked it as she watched him disrobe. He was not a bad looking man. Her heart though truly belonged to Derek, and no one had any doubts about this, not Manfred, and not Derek. She had agreed to do this before the event because they did not want to go with any regrets. Manfred lay down next to her and for two minutes looked into her green eyes. He then ran his hand through her hair and down the side of her face. She put the cigarette out, and began to touch Manfred. As her hand moved lower and lower and thus reaching its destination Manfred’s eyes closed, and he lay back and fully enjoyed what she was doing.

                Her head had now replaced her hand and she wrapped her cool moist lips around him. He grabbed the blanket they were on as she performed this marvelous act. Before he had a chance to finish she stopped, and lay on her back.  Manfred began by kissing her, and he knew what was about to happen was going to be pleasant for both of them.

                Bout forty five minutes later the flashlight had now began to signal Derek to come back inside the house. Derek walked up the stairs and into the house, handed Percy to Manfred, and kissed Leslie. They all moved onto the rug and sat down. Derek opened the basket and removed three wine glasses and a very expensive bottle of wine. He then poured the first glass which went to Leslie, and then the second which went to Manfred, and then one for himself. Manfred sat Percy’s bag on the floor and opened it all the way. Dennis pulled another type of bottle from the basket now. He opened it and handed everyone five little pills. All three of them took these pills and put them into the wine.

                Manfred looked down at his fish, only to see the fish had escaped from its bag. As Percy died he and his friends began to drink their wine. They then lay down on the blanket, and closed their eyes. Derek felt very sleepy, he could feel Leslie’s hand interlace with his. All he could see now inside the darkness was her. He then felt sleepier and could feel his body simply giving up. Her hand began to grow limp before it finally slipped away. This did not bother him, fore he could feel that he was going to be with her again soon..


Richard McLin @ 2011

© 2018 Richard McLin

Author's Note

Richard McLin
My first piece of writing in sometime, so I hope you all enjoy it. Reviews are very welcome.

My Review

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Featured Review

you're very adept at grabbing the reader and holding them with suspense. this did not turn out at all like i expected. you also have a subtle way of smacking a reader with surprise and throwing curve-balls. a good piece of writing and great character development. crafty plot ... :)

Posted 2 Weeks Ago

1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


you're very adept at grabbing the reader and holding them with suspense. this did not turn out at all like i expected. you also have a subtle way of smacking a reader with surprise and throwing curve-balls. a good piece of writing and great character development. crafty plot ... :)

Posted 2 Weeks Ago

1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Sjoeee- I’m not sure of what I’m meant to feel here- not such a happy feeling bit of sadness not really knowing why and for what reason but I’m sure it will all be explained later- interesting and captivating🌹

Posted 1 Month Ago

I wasn't expecting that 0.0 . Kept me on edge, waiting for the boogieman to show up from the darkness. The tag nearly made me believe that it was about horror. Love it!!!, but it is also really sad.

Posted 4 Months Ago

1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Thanks for sharing this. The imagery sucks you in and you care for the characters. What more could a writer want from the reader? You also, in a short space of time, capture...oblivion.

Posted 5 Years Ago

Richard McLin

5 Years Ago

Thanks Brother. Exactly what I was going for. Glad you liked it.
Strong writing, very sensual.

Posted 7 Years Ago

I would truly be a liar if I said this was bad.
I pretty much liked reading this.

Posted 7 Years Ago

I am new to writing and am just randomly picking things to read.

I liked this story a lot, its very touching.

thanks for sharing it.

Posted 7 Years Ago

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7 Reviews
Shelved in 1 Library
Added on March 13, 2011
Last Updated on February 2, 2018
Tags: suicide, love, sex, friendship, end of the world, apocalypse, fish, abandoned house


Richard McLin
Richard McLin

Salem, OR

I have been writing ever since I can remember. I can't live and not write, it's as essential as breath. more..


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