Cerelia’s Pyre

Hokku (Autumn) 3-4-3 form

October

Leaves set aglow

Finale

Reviews

[Roger Ferguson II]

doesnt express the emotion of the piece

[Roger Ferguson II]

the last line is only 2, finally would be 3. still not bad.

[James Paulin]

fi-nal-e (American Heritage Dictionary)

[Ferg]

beautiful fall feeling, but a bit of sadness to it as well.

[alesuriko]

Very nice. I love the color these words evoke in my mind. So vivid and beautiful from so few words. Well done!

[David W Moore III]

finale - nice touch. I am not a huge fan of extremely short pieces because they typically do not evoke as much from me, BUT this piece and with that one word added after the second line, exploded images in my mind. Fantastic!

[A sea person]

very interesting - i keep thinking of burning leaves in the fire pit on Halloween.

Just so you know - a hokku isn't divided by syllables like American haiku. It's actually divided by sounds. The difference is very subtle. A way to think about it is that the work Tokyo has 3 syllables but 4 sounds.

[Wicahpi]

Very nice

[Ed Hart]

seasonal
dancing color
colder nights