Front Steps in the Morning

just a snippet of life I saw on my way to work

She was sitting on the tiles of the front steps , a two story brick walk up, one early fall morning.  The sun was out and we were headed for a beautiful day but those tiles looked cold and the steps lonely.   A crooked mosaic with the name Francis Marion in blue broken tiles was prominently embedded  before the door and could not be missed..   I wondered for a moment who Francis Marion was and why his name was placed here for all who pass by to see . I thought to look him up later.  She was comfortable there �" in a familiar place �" lived there I’m sure.  Not the only person either  who sat on those steps , a can overflowing with cigarette butts and an empty coffee cup  off to the side testified to that.

Smoking her first cigarette of the day and drinking a cup of coffee �" she was waking up to meet the day or  the day was up and going and had found her here , in this familiar spot . The smoke whiffed thru her lungs numbing her mind while it also satisfied her craving. The coffee coursed thru her veins but no longer brought the stimulated she craved �" just brought her up to a flat line.

It was Tuesday only but she looked  deep into what was a long week.,   Dirty blond hair tossed around from a night of sleep, face a bit swollen needing to be washed,  eyes puffy , yesterday’s make up clinging still.  

an age of unknown years but   but  to old now  to bounce back as quickly in the mornings like  she used to  �" no - now the choices she made at night met her hard the next morning  and it took well into the morning to rebound

I wondered if Francis had ever lived in this building , had he ever sat on these same steps smoking in the early morning.

Reviews

[barleygirl]

The construction of your writing seems a little sketchy to me, but your vignette is still compelling becuz of your interesting observations about the world around you. This snippet contains a well-balanced mix of what you observe & what you are guessing about. We all imagine things to fill out a portrait when we people-watch. It's fun to watch you do that here with openness & honesty. This is a great way to practice writing, to just jot down what you observe! (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

[flaco]

BarleyGirl
I agree and am not feeling that this is done and it does not flow as much as I would like . I need to come back and edit .

thanks for your thoughts

xoxoxo
flaco