Red off rosewater's blush...

 Drowned in ten thousand 

                 ocean refrains

teeming blood rain, killing

             the red off rose's blush

lofty footprints on

          hardened sandbanks,

lost about misty mountain

               tops, defunct of air 

stepped towards a ledge of

           despair's crooked mile,

one foot in  graveyard's 

                  disparaging waves

plunged in a million

             deluged tides of poetry's

     disenchanted rhyme,

breached the haven of 

             lighthouse's beaches,

spied the trail left behind

       no impressions were tread,

drifting alone

        on this sea of 

              foamy indifference 

Author's Note

Reviews

[Adreamer's Bluejay]

The beginning of my comment is going to seem a bit off topic, but I love Tori Amos and this song fits your piece absolutely perfectly, well, beyond perfectly. I love how this piece uses descriptions almost like hers without being too closely alike and how you gave the piece your own unique voice (that kind of thing would make any influencing artist or musically paired artist proud). I really like the way you went about making your point in this write.

Drowned in ten thousand
ocean refrains

^ amazing introduction, you really got my attention here, without really giving away too much just yet.

teeming blood rain, killing
the red off rose's blush
lofty footprints on
hardened sandbanks,
lost about misty mountain
tops, defunct of air
stepped towards a ledge of
despair's crooked mile,

^ This is an amazing use of creativity to move along not only your story but develop the emotional undertones of this piece, which have been created and shared so masterfully. Great job, beautiful use of imagery.

one foot in graveyard's
disparaging waves

^ I love this transition and how it gives the reader not only a scene but some foreshadowing along with symbolism, depending on how they read it.

plunged in a million
deluged tides of poetry's
disenchanted rhyme,
breached the haven of
lighthouse's beaches,

^ The above lines are my favorite within this piece, they just sort of stuck with me, I can't even tell you why even though I swear I am trying to.

spied the trail left behind
no impressions were tread,
drifting alone
on this sea of
foamy indifference

^ Extraordinary conclusion. I love the way you wrapped up this entire piece of profound thought with something so completely simple.

Amazingly penned write.

[Christy the Poetic Hear..]

I actually feel like drowning in your words. Wonderful writing!!

[Sami Khalil]

"one foot in graveyard's
disparaging waves
plunged in a million
deluged tides of poetry's
disenchanted rhyme,
breached the haven of
lighthouse's beaches,"

We all missed your marvelous poetry and their impact on all of us. Know that you are not drifting alone for we are all behind you even in our prayers of goodwill. Excellent...:).......

[KeeD]

Hi you glorious magnifique artist of words, your poems are like tattoos I would consider getting on my skin. Permanent, beautiful and an outlet of your ever flowing creativity. Your message in a bottle was received and your poetry might have just saved a man cast away. I have hope, you words my Wilson.

[The Cuckoo's Nest]

Yes, the imagery creates a hopeless tone.

[Zakari Schmidt]

Fantastic imagery, this is just a beautiful poem :)

[John Alexander McFadyen]

So why is love so difficult to find?

[Michael G.]

Wow . . .


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[wordiggerone]

Your conclusion stuns me into silence, Frieda!

[Ruth]

I am completely immersed...missed reading you hon, but your words are only a flick away when I grab time, precious piece ♥

[InsanityWriter]

I felt like was floating in the ocean as I read this piece. Your words carry a rhythm and take the reader into the waters of one's mind as they contemplate your poetry. :) Absolutely lovely work here, Frieda.