Your last line sort of turns the poem around in my head. It's almost like a Lazarus poem. Dead to the world and then, the heartbreaking beauty of life comes bursting in and shakes the dead to life. I like the way your chosen images offer the sweetness and the starkness. The flowers you've used as symbols are all these heady, heavily scented things that permeate the air--sometimes some of them are described as sickly sweet, but a lot of this perception is in the eye of the beholder.
Like the way a certain fragrance can evoke a bad memory and can never hold anything but that memory again. The associations we have impact the way we perceive life so much of the time. So, you have all this beauty at the surface, but mixed with that is the bruise and brokenness of time--the shards and shells--the husk of our lives laid out before us to be puzzled together. Whether this brings the deadeye a blink or a stillness remains a question for the future. I like the hopefulness of your ending. It is like saying: life is a continual process and nothing is ever settled.
Posted 3 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
3 Years Ago
thanks, Eilis, believe it or not I always try and infuse a little hope into my poems, lol, it was a .. read morethanks, Eilis, believe it or not I always try and infuse a little hope into my poems, lol, it was a bit of an invisible hand about this one just sort of went with the flow of the word flow, glad you enjoyed thanks for the great review, always appreciate your insight and thoughts on my mad rambles
Broken shards and bruised rose petals...lions and tigers and bears, oh my, but what's this? It seems to find a moment of resurrection and a soft perfume in the air, much like waking from a bad dream to the fragrant aroma of strong coffee in the morning. That always brings me back to life. A toast to you my friend, for your creative and expressive descriptions here. Well done. I enjoyed. F.
Posted 3 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
3 Years Ago
glad you enjoyed this blast from the past,
Fabian, appreciate the great review,
Your last line sort of turns the poem around in my head. It's almost like a Lazarus poem. Dead to the world and then, the heartbreaking beauty of life comes bursting in and shakes the dead to life. I like the way your chosen images offer the sweetness and the starkness. The flowers you've used as symbols are all these heady, heavily scented things that permeate the air--sometimes some of them are described as sickly sweet, but a lot of this perception is in the eye of the beholder.
Like the way a certain fragrance can evoke a bad memory and can never hold anything but that memory again. The associations we have impact the way we perceive life so much of the time. So, you have all this beauty at the surface, but mixed with that is the bruise and brokenness of time--the shards and shells--the husk of our lives laid out before us to be puzzled together. Whether this brings the deadeye a blink or a stillness remains a question for the future. I like the hopefulness of your ending. It is like saying: life is a continual process and nothing is ever settled.
Posted 3 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
3 Years Ago
thanks, Eilis, believe it or not I always try and infuse a little hope into my poems, lol, it was a .. read morethanks, Eilis, believe it or not I always try and infuse a little hope into my poems, lol, it was a bit of an invisible hand about this one just sort of went with the flow of the word flow, glad you enjoyed thanks for the great review, always appreciate your insight and thoughts on my mad rambles
What a contrast between the scent of lavender, that hint of lilac, the mention of rose petal blues and the undercurrent of effluent risin. We have beauty here amid I suspect the crap that also comes with life. There is sadness here and this reader felt it.
you sing the blues with a rainbow of colours and experiences
feels so somber but reads so beautifully
Posted 4 Years Ago
4 Years Ago
Glad you enjoyed, Edie, singing the blues is the question, Miles Davis - Kind of blue is good backgr.. read moreGlad you enjoyed, Edie, singing the blues is the question, Miles Davis - Kind of blue is good background music for all things
oooh...."effluent" .....great word..
i would really like to know exactly what the third eye sees...
and even when we are dead, will we be alive...will know what others thought of us when we were walking the earth.
i like the references to all of the sad things we can feel...a taste of all of them...and a universal weeping...
love the imagery and feeling from this...especially the "rose petal blues"
j.
Posted 4 Years Ago
4 Years Ago
Thanks, j. you bring up some interesting ideas, which I could discuss at length, glad you enjoyed
Me thinks folks around these parts are going to have loads of fun getting to the bottom of this offering from the Linski stable. It has all the hallmarks from the staccato melody to the provocative language and images mixed with clever [subtle] nuggets of wisdom and an angry undercurrent aiming to shock, provoke and engage the reader. Perhaps the alternative view might be your therapist playing word association games while charging you a huge fee!
Posted 4 Years Ago
4 Years Ago
Hahaha, my therapist left me for a younger unhealthier man, so my G.P. said to me but he was also re.. read moreHahaha, my therapist left me for a younger unhealthier man, so my G.P. said to me but he was also replaced by someone else,
4 Years Ago
Ah replacement therapy. Must be a clinical trial somewhere talking up the efficacy!
Caged In An Animal's Mind
Caged in an animal's mind;
No wish to be more or else
Than I am; a smile and a grief
Of breath that thinks with its blood,
Yet straining despite; unsure
In my stir .. more..