Poem 35. Come to the Dark

Would you come to the dark and see what I have seen?

Come to the dark with your light

You have something to see

Come, come to the dark.

 

In the darkness, eyes spark

Waiting for its prey

Come to the dark with your light.

 

It stretches its paws

Eager to touch one’s skin

Come, come to the dark.

 

Constantly honing its fangs

Through grinding its victuals

Come to the dark with your light.

 

Its belly is bulging in  grand

His diet seems so much

Come, come to  the dark.

 

Why are you afraid?

Throw out all your fears

Come to the dark with your light

Come, come to the dark.

Author's Note

Reviews

[Allen Smuckler]

Excellent write dhaye...I think I got stuck in the 10 syllable line... but reading yours showed me that you can mix and match and it still rides smoothly and effortlessly. ..
Also, When I researched a villanelle, I gleaned from the example of Dylan Thomas' "Do Not Go Gentle into the night" That the 2nd line should rhyme with the preceding 2nd line throughout the poem...which makes it more difficult to write but no more effective.
Your write worked no matter what you call it or what style or form it is...It is just a terrific poem.
allen

[Souladareatease]

wonderful venture into the Dark Dhaye formed well!!!
To know love of light we embrace the dark-You penned it eerily excellent!!!

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

Thanks, Souladareatease. :) Glad you like it. :)

[Brandon S. Whitten]

Excellent read and write.

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

Excellent... wow! Thanks, Brandon. That's my first dark poetry. :)

[Ency Bearis]

Why should I come into the dark........ayaw ko nga.......may aswang dyan !
Ha,ha, ha, nice one dyahe.....really an eerie write.

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

Hehe. Like what Marc said. Nag-iinvite daw ako sa dark yun pala may monster. hehe. That's why my description is "Would you come to the dark and see what I have seen?" Oh, di ba,Sir Ency. Nakalusot yung weakness ng poem. Hehe. It's up to you if you will come with me or not , to the dark. Hehe.
Thanks for the R&R. :)

[ms. barrie]

dhaye: this is nothing short of being amazing...wow, very eerie, alluring imagery. your words weaved a web for the reader, leaving them spellbound. the fluidity and the choice of music (well sound affect)...icing on the cake...delicious dark...brilliantly penned. thank you for sharing. 100 to 100 *favs.*

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

Thanks for dropping by, Barrie. I am flattered by your words. You're the one better when it comes to dark poetry. :)

[ms. barrie]

you're very welcome, dhaye i had a wonderful visit, aaacckk that is some spooky sound affects. Hardly better...more like more rambling. Oh before i came very active on here...i was obsessed with watching the exorcism tapes of Annelise Michel (The real life Emily Rose) on You Tube -- over and over again, and i guess it resonated with me, every time i watched/listened to those videos...the hair on the back of my neck stood up, now that's some scary stuff! p.s. thank you for the cookies :)

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

You're welcome, Barrie. Take care. :)

[ms. barrie]

thank you dhaye, oh i have to add this music/video to my Sims 2 game for my zombie/vampire sims...yes!

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

You're welcome. Glad the music has that value for you. Good luck. :)

[ms. barrie]

thank you :)

[Khaled A Khunaifer]

Beautiful poem, I think it can be a great part of a play

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

Thanks. Glad you find it beautiful. :)

[Pax]

this is like a chanting poem to lure everyone into the dark ~ to mestified an individual just to be devoured by a moster... :D

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

Yes, Pax. Thanks for The R&R. :)

[Sami Khalil]

"It stretches its paws
Eager to touch one’s skin
Come, come to the dark."
A nice poem that is Gothic and with great touches of the dark...Well done...:)

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

Thanks for dropping by, Sami. glad you find it a nice one. :)

[Sami Khalil]

You are welcome...:)

[Marc Marlon Villaflor]

Lol :) parang ayuko pumunta sa dark, tinatwag mo ako tapos monster pala ang nasa dark, lol, it is stunning poem, but the dark tone is light. But it is a good start, you left us undicided if we come or not in the dark.

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

Hehehe. Lakas ng tawa ko sa yo, Marc. Dapat pala baguhin ko yung description nya para tamang-tama sa sinabi mo. Hehe. Thanks. :)

[Marc Marlon Villaflor]

lol :)

[Pax]

bakit kasi nag basa ako dito bago sa poem ~ ayan tuloy pag tapos kong basahin napatawa ako...lol

[Marc Marlon Villaflor]

lol :) oo nga.

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

Hehe. tsismis muna inuuna ni Pax bago mag-review. Lol :)

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

This is a Villanelle, another form of poetry.