MY PRECIOUS MAN (Ballade)

My first attempt in writing a BALLADE (not to be confused with the ballad)

Among the thousand faces in this place

 I  hear his voice like thunder in the skies

I see his light, my dear , I am amaze

But I am not afraid  to show my cries

I bare the real me before his eyes

He never thinks each word as lie or pun

And yes, I admire him, he is so nice

Forever in my heart, my precious man.

 

I never think it’s true between each race

 We’ll be fond of our traits, those aren’t lies

I am so fond of him just like a craze

Obsessed of thoughts that angel really flies

To spread his wings for me, see how he tries

He’s like the rain to me, and even sun

And yes, he is a gem among us, guys

Forever in my heart, my precious man.

 

My love for him is soft just like a lace

 He is so kind, so cool, he is so wise

For his heart is like gold I want to praise

He is so far from those pretending guys

He’s real and never tries to speak with lies

He never leave and run away or shun

And yes, he is that gem, I'll see him rise

Forever in my heart, my precious man.

 

He is an angel, dear, I’ll tell it twice

He makes me smile and laugh and have some fun

And yes, being with him is like a prize

Forever in my heart, my precious man.

 

 

 

 

 

Author's Note

The BALLADE as a verse form typically consists of three eight-line stanzas, each with a consistent meter and a particular rhyme scheme. The last line in the stanza is a refrain. The stanzas are often followed by a four-line concluding stanza (an envoi). The rhyme scheme is therefore usually 'ababbcbC ababbcbC ababbcbC bcbC', where the capital 'C' is a refrain.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ballade_%28forme_fixe%29

Reviews

[NeiL ArandA]

Dhaye this is a very lovely and heartfelt tribute to someone who may have had a great influence in your life. I'm not familiar with the structure you are attempting to pattern your piece with. To adhere to such strict rules and still create a beautiful piece in itself is phenomenal. You are indeed very gifted and talented.Thank you for sharing your thoughts. What a blessed and exceptional person you're trying to portray and giving the credit here.

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

This is for Mr. Rain. Next time, I will make something for someone who said I'm his BFF...since I am seeing something interesting these past few days. =)

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

Thank you, Neil. You are supportive to me. =)

[NeiL ArandA]

Ok i'll try to be super good and super nice and super friendly so you might create a piece for me . LOL in my dreams :(

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

I have created one for you...actually... Oh Youth...remember? I made it for you because I felt that you are continuously "beating" me like an enemy before... And you have a big part in it...so apt to be a collaborative output because it's really for you. LOL

[Deuces]

Amazing tribute and beautifully penned.

The most important of all... "He is so far from those pretending guys"
Finding someone authentic can indeed make one write like this. Loved it.

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

Thanks, GVC. =)

[ayosonolowo]

Beautiful incredible, a spledid poem.

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

Thank you!

[gabrielle]

I am not familiar with the structure but the flow of this piece is very smooth. As to the content, the respect, and admiration are immediately showing in this piece. The precious man sounds so perfect (Ok, I’ll stop in here as I don’t want to spoil this piece with some sparks of cynicism = ). Angels comes in different shapes and colors and I strongly believe that they don’t necessarily have wings but they have big hearts… =)

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

I'm trying to make something uncommon. LOL. Honestly, I'm trying to make different forms/types of poetry, especially those which are not commonly presented.
Thank you so much, Gab. But I'm having my repose for a while. Just came here to read and give review comments. =)

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

Being cynical will only create gaps on relationships. LOL. When we learn how to trust people, we see their hearts...and we see how perfect it (the heart) is in our eyes. Sometimes in this world where you receive unexpected blessings from other people, you wish to give back the love in the best possible way you could. I received so much blessings...and words of gratitude are the only ones I can give back. Or shall I say, I'm just emotional and easy to please? I'm always grateful for every single blessing I receive from other people...not in terms of material things. You are one of them, Gab. I can see your heart. You care for me. LOL

[gabrielle]

Me book kaya na "The Art of Trusting", i think i need to buy one. LOL. You have admirable mindset dhaye. Share your blessings din =)

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

Gawa tayo. LOL

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

I mean gawa tayo ng aklat...LOL

[gabrielle]

...^____^...

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

((( * < - )))

[CoraZanini]

"I bare the real me before his eyes"

So greatly penned! Keep up!

[Eddie Davis]

Very nice, and the comparison with an angel is delightful. I love to see these new (well, new to me) forms of poetry and reading your work is quite often a learning experience. Thanks, Dhaye, for expanding my knowledge.

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

Thank you so much, Eddie. I have made compilations of songs, stories, quotes and poems into volumes of books....but this time, I want something educational because my co-teachers are asking something to be put inside our school library for reference. So these poems in different forms will be going to that book in progress.

[Eddie Davis]

Wonderful -- how neat to think that your work will be used to teach others.

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

Actually, they're asking for Hear My Mind Vol. 2 and 3, but I thought, it would be more helpful if the kinds and forms of poetry will be explained then given examples.

[The Rock And Roll Cowbo..]

A very loving ode to your man, it is easy to see the feelings run deep.

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

Thanks for reading, cowboy!

[The Rock And Roll Cowboy(REBEL WITH A CAUSE)]

Thanks for sharing your words.

[Jack...]

Lovely my sweet friend. This feeling, deep in your heart shows in the smile of your words today. I could not be happier for you my friend. This was simply a beautiful tribute to love.

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

Thank you, Jack. :)

[Lydia Shutter]

Heavy sigh! How beautiful your adoring words are, Dh! You are really good with the forms....you stuck perfectly to the rhyme scheme and it never seemed forced. This is a man we would all like to have in our lives...and what a lucky man he is to have your love! Wonderful work. Lydi**

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

Normally, I can make poems from 5 to 30 minutes...but this one, I made it for almost an hour. It's really difficult to make a new form for the first try. But glad I did not fail according to your assessment.
That man is almost a perfect man and I wish he can find the most deserving woman...because he is really a gem. He's like an angel who guides me so I love him as my favorite and best friend...
Thank you, Lydi. =)

[Saddam]

He is an angel, dear, I’ll tell it twice
He makes me smile and laugh and have some fun
And yes, my love for him make me ablaze
Forever in my heart, my precious man.

Great.....simply great poem. I fell in love at your writing skill. Great.

[Daisie Vergara (Dhaye)]

Thank you so much, Ssadd. =)

[Saddam]

you are most welcome dear.