Shakespearify - Calling all lovers of the Bard

Imagine writing in the language and style of shakespeare? Now you can!

Calling all Shakespeare lovers. Remember these famous lyrics?

"They told him don't you ever come around here
Don't wanna see your face, you better disappear
The fire's in their eyes and their words are really clear
So beat it, just beat it

You better run, you better do what you can
Don't wanna see no blood, don't be a macho man
You wanna be tough, better do what you can"

The words of Michael Jackson's "Beat it." But how would those lyrics sound in Shakespeares time? Well, here they are;

"They told him do not thou ever come abroad here
Don't wish to survey thy countenance, thou out-wage disappear
The fire's within their eyes and their words art really clear
So assailing it, square assailing it

You out-wage run, thou out-wage doth what thou can
Don't wish to survey none blood, do not be a macho man
You wish to be grained, out-wage doth what thou can"

Now read a modern message by e-mail, looking through the eyes of the Bard;

"Hi Guys

What's happening dudes?

I'm with that hot babe and we're somewhere really cool. We are laying on a beach in California with a cool beer and a hot kiss.

Sorry about the party man, I know I was wrong when I came down heavy on you. But. Hey, you can be a real idiot sometimes. How's your girlfriend now?"

Shakespeare writes;

"Wholesome morrow Guys

What's passage dudes?

I'm with that good-affrontd biddy and we be somewhere really keel. We art laying on a beach within California with a keel ale and a good-affrontd bill.

Sorry about the domineer swain, I wot I was nayward whenas I came under ouch on ye. Yet. Hey, ye can be a verily dullard sometimes. How's thy kicky-wicky yare?"

The good news is that anyone can do this with any piece of writing, personal, comedy sketch, or song lyrics. My son and I have created a website tool called "Shakespearify" which basically translates any text that you paste onto it into Shakesperian English. It's good for learning but, most of all, it's a real laugh. The website is free and there's a downloadable App for less than a dollar.

https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=air.Shakespearify

Let me know what you think, thou gentle scribbling folk.