panic

just a piece i done while waiting on the shopping to be delivered

Panic

widespread panic, everyone runs.

Story so far; theres a man with a gun.

Fear and confusion, evident to see

with bulging eyes as they collectively flee.

Bags are dropped - shopping forgot,

self-preservation steaming hot.

The boy lowers his toy - just a plastic gun;

a normal kid just having fun - not understanding

what the terrrorists have done.

Police surround him - just to make sure,

the young boy with his toy laid out on

the floor....

Comes to something when kids can't be kids

anymore....

Author's Note

comments and criticisms welcome

Reviews

[Short Lip Fuser]

Very relevant piece of writing and vivid picture of the sad state of events in the world. Often I think of how fast kids are forced to grow up and simply can't be the kids of yesteryear. I dig the second stanza..."bulging eyes" that the people fleeing have but also used to see the "Fear and confusion'". I have just a little trouble with the flow of the 4th stanza. Great job.

[hcarson]

Thank you for reading and your comment, much appreciated 😊 i understand what youre saying.

[Short Lip Fuser]

I recant what I said about the 4th stanza. I just reread the poem and no trouble with the 4th stanza. My brain processing must have been faulty when I initially read it 😜

[hcarson]

Aha..i no the feeling, my brain is constantly like that..forgot what its like to function straight lol!!

[hi]

ok this poem kinda shocked me, but you got a point when children cant be children but that is the time we now live in,
but i dont under stand why people are so scared, i mean we allways had people causing crimes and bad stuff,
it happened all the time, our own people use to do it,
but it seems now we are more scared of everything then we have ever been

[hcarson]

I think its the fact children are seen in pictures with guns and at beheadings etc...this may have happened before but of course now with social media bang..its right there in our homes over breakfast...its on the streets randomly with axes, knives and trucks..anywhere any time and all in videos and pics within seconds...makes it a lot more real to those that were so distant from it before.

[hi]

maybe, or maybe it is just over done to make it more dramatic, the more sad it sounds the more tv like it,
iam not saying stuff dont happen but i also understand that tv needs ratings so they try to make it sound bad as possible

[hcarson]

Of course and they report biasly no doubt but other than reading between the lines thats all we hwve to go off...especially us more fortunate on all sides where luckily it hasnt aftually touched or lives. Sadly it will never stop either, there will always be someone who wants to rule the world..as humans we are sadly flawed.

[Sir Drift & Mr. Pulse]

so, its been a long time since I've been around but I'm so glad I dropped into your page and read this, it is very descriptive in today's mind of terrorism, and it is really shocking how this is actually something they would do, using innocent children who yet know not of good and bad or how it comes in between. Your poem here settles in the helpless mind of this boy and as well twists into the evil behind it. very well done, I love how you gave this a shot.

[hcarson]

thank you sir drift..i too have been away a long time with my studies but am back..thank you for your comment, always appreciated :)

[Sami Khalil]

A crazy world indeed and you describe it powerfully. Those crazy and evil ones will face their due justice one day...Excellent...:).................

[hcarson]

thank you so much for your comment Sk, I really appreciate the positive feedback, thank you so much :)

[Sami Khalil]

You are welcome .....:)))))

[Cyprian Van Dyke]

Whoa, powerful, poem with a great moral and twist to it. I enjoyed reading it!I like your rhyming too. Tyfs!

[hcarson]

thank you for your lovely comment, i really appreciate it. we live in a crazy world right now, sort of hoped to capture that, glad you enjoyed :)

[Cyprian Van Dyke]

You're right about that. Yvw!

[Inject Positivity]

Your poem reflects the present situation of the world, and you said very well through your write... Now I got why you gave the title 'panic'... I like some of your phrases so much here... And the last line contains something very deep... Excellent job again frnd...

Sincerely
Dhiman

[hcarson]

thank you for your coments dhiman, appreciated a lot. todas world is a scary place to be for so many of us..never knowing where will be struck next or in what manner or by who..adult, child..it's crazy..a difficult war to fight when you never know where it's coming from...bit like this poem..had no idea where i was going with it when i put pen to paper lol