never trip without your hat. -or- please do not disturb the other patients.

part of...what turned out to be about 25 pages of babble ranging from my inability to speak up for myself, to my poor penmanship. i couldnt have done it all without my hat.

 

They don’t want me to write it down

They make it harder to write down when you’re like this

Oh its so poetic

Lay there

Just lay

            There

 

Don’t do a god damned thing.

 

Well you know what?

I don’t care

If you’re there

                        Or not

 

Every day

Every god damned day

It’s the same f*****g thing.

No matter what

Its always the same.

 

They don’t want me to say it.

Don’t give it a name

When you have its name

You can kill it.

 

 

 

D****t!

They almost got me again

M***********s!

They really are cunning

They really are sly

Thinking they got me so easily

 

You all laugh you all smile

“be nice to him”

here I am

talking to myself

everyday

not knowing

whether i have to s**t

piss

or vomit

lonely

and slowly

becoming the metaphor

because i cant s**t

and I dont want to get off the pot.

So f**k it.

I don’t care

If you’re there

Or not

Its my trip and ill do with it as I please

The same thing

Over again.

Because I aint got the balls

To s**t

Or kill myself.

 

Yes it does.

 

They don’t want me to write

It down

They don’t want me

F**k em

Im gonna keep on fishing

 

Look at him

Look at him shaking

Look at him talking to himself

Aint he precious

Aint he darling?

Well f**k you lady!

BECAUSE WHY NOT!

THAT’S F*****G WHY!
WHY F*****G NOT!?!?!

 

The best I can hope for, is someone reading this and thinking, there’s a boy who thinks he gets it. He’s kinda clever sometimes. Well, he thinks he is.

 

THE PLAY IS GOING ON IN HIS HEAD!

 

Know what I mean?

 

The words start to look like tommys

The words start to look like pats

The words don’t look like his?

 

He just wants to go to sleep.

He knows that it’s all the same.

He knows

And its shows

Lord it shows

That he knows

His carefully timed wit

F**k him.

F**k him dead.

He aint gonna pull the f*****g trigger

Just let him write.

F**k him

He hates himself

Obviously

He’s crazy.

Narcissistic?

How can you blame him

In a world that your crazy

If you want to off yourself

They put you away.

Shush.

Don’t speak

You know

Please do not disturb the other patients

 

I don’t see much of a difference.

 

 

Well what is there for me

If I don’t want to play?

Believe me

I do want

            To come out and play

I do.

But not in that way.

What is there for me

Other than the nuthouses

            Bars

            Churches

            Women

            Lurches

            Forward

Dry heaving now…

Dry heaving now…

All the dude wanted was his rug back.

Reviews

[Spilled Her Guts in Cur..]

I love this. It's really raw and full of pure emotion. Not structured, not measured carefully I just really can feel it just falling out of you and that's exactly what I wanted from this competiotion.

Great write!