The Last

I am the last surviving child

standing among the coal.

The ash and blood under my feet

have poisoned my sweet soul.

The emptiness of all that's lost

hovers over rubble of remains.

The ghosts of memories swirl around,

but they bring me only pain.

 

I am the last surviving child

just howling in the wind.

All I've ever loved is gone,

it's like I've never been.

 

Reviews

[lee von cleef]

Not to take this poem away from you, but I have found when a poem or a horse gets this good ,they take on a identity of their own, The trainer or Writer, has to sit back manage them ,put them in the right company so they can win a rose, So pick a spot ,this poem ,has blood ,coal black,running through its Soul.Find a bigger forum for it to shine in, it is ready for print.

[icelandicblue]

I am almost not sure how to respond. Thank you for your confidence in this poem. To be honest, I do think this is one of the most visceral poems I have written. Seriously, thank you so much! What a nice thing to say.

[TL Boehm]

so sad. Sometimes I look in the mirror and see the monster and I think - I was never a sweet child. But my heart aches for those who were. this one put a knot in my stomach.

[icelandicblue]

Thank you Tammy.

[Tom]

Superbly surreal, a tragedy soulfully penned !

[icelandicblue]

Thank you Tom.

[Einstein Noodle]

i agree ...powerful with loss and emptiness ... the end of a lineage is very heart breaking... also thought instantly of coal miners who loose fathers and sons and brother's all through their history ... so many tragic deaths ... love and peace IceBlue
E.

[icelandicblue]

Thanks Einstein, same to you.

[Baby Ricochet]

Wow! It's beautiful and painful at the same time. Great write Blue

[icelandicblue]

Thank you BR...in all the poems I've ever written this is the only one where I cried as I wrote it.

[Rita L. Sev]

This is an amazing poem, raw in emotion. I see that it was written several months ago, and I am wondering if it was penned in reaction to the death of a loved one. To lose everyone, (or enough so that it feels that way) leaves us without an anchor. Sad, yet superb, Blue.

[icelandicblue]

Thank you Rita. For whatever reason I am partial to this poem which didn't get a lot of attention when it was new. Yes, it is about a loss I had suffered. Thank you for reading.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

to be the only one left when everyone else we loved is gone..

it makes us wonder if we ever even existed...we lose the last ties we have to what is and who are real.

very sad write...you pack so much emotion into this..

glad it came back up...i would have missed this really intense write.
and the memories are not comforting...they bring only pain...

i just want to forget them, forget me.

[icelandicblue]

As do I jacob,

I have suffered many tragedies in my life-lifetimes of them. Thank you.

[redflutterby]

I love to read....in my life I've read probably close to 800 books. Some was pleasure reading...those easy cheap thrills we hate to admit too. Others were bestsellers...we've all read. Then there's the ones that define us by touching our very souls. If I classified poetry in the same way this piece would be in the latter. It reached into my chest and squeezed the air from my lungs.

I cared for my grandmother in her last months. She was having a terrible time one day...couldn't get out of bed without help. And she looked up at me with fear and started crying. I wanted to be strong for her...but I couldn't. I broke down...we sat there together holding hands...weeping. Somehow I managed to say it was okay...I'm here. That's what I want to do right now...take your hand and say " You're not alone".

[icelandicblue]

Thank you so much Red- your support has been so appreciated and so supportive and I truly needed it.

[Frieda P]

You're killing me here today blue...what can I say, affecting beyond any words could convey. 100/100

[icelandicblue]

Thanks- this has been up there as one of the worst days of my life.

[Angel]

OH...
This goes way beyond beautiful.
Beyond magnificent...
This is

majestic.


Wow.

[icelandicblue]

Thanks Angel. Hope you're having a good day.

[Angel]

I am, Icelandicblue...in spite of....people