Broken Feet

To count feet jurassically

‘Tis to rhyme most classically

stress and unstress I’ve been told

keeping time your rhyme unfolds

See the lopping off of words

forced to fit with image blurred

follows such a rule so strict

losing meaning, over picked

Were I to attempt this feat

join the club of those elite

egos large and overblown

beg forgiveness and atone

Yet again I think not

let them think that I’ve got squat

imagery is what I bleed

and with that I shall proceed

Writing from the outside in

taking barbs across the chin

won’t be turning black and blue

to that crowd I say screw you!

Reviews

[jacob erin-cilberto]

i love this poem..

screw the critics ----

and form???? good grief...sometimes words are so stuffed uncomfortably into a poem to keep with the form...that the meanings and heart of the poem is non-existent..

writing from the gut and heart...whether it rhymes or not...follows form or not...whatever it does...the voice wants to be individual..not what everyone else expects..

bravo to the words you have written here.

jacob

[icelandicblue]

Why I thank you. I agree that those lopped off words are so artificial that the poem has no heart.

[Traci]

You have your own unique style Anne and it shines vibrantly in this beautifully articulated piece.
You write with heart...a true reflection of your soul, and that is admirable my friend.

[icelandicblue]

Many thank Traci, you are always so kind.

[K.N. Lorenzen]

What a lovely, "cheeky" poem!!
A confident, beautiful language

You are, indeed, very gifted
Thank you for sharing!

K.

[icelandicblue]

Why thank you very much!

[K.N. Lorenzen]

Excuse me??;)

[redflutterby]

Damn....I love this Anne!! You know I'm a free verse girl....I just can't follow the form and rhyme thing unless it happens on its own. And I hate when others want you to fit in the same box as them. We all have our own style.. ;-)

[icelandicblue]

Thanks so much. I just wanted to prove I could do it and have it mean something. Glad you liked it, that put a big smile on my face.

[Frieda P]

Ha, I love it....like minds and all that jazz! If it doesn't move the soul what good is rhyme or a stitch in time, I think this is sublime! Just saying ;-)

[icelandicblue]

Ha! Thanks, written because an old troll told me my poetry wasn't poetry w'out it's meter n' rhyme. This was my pithy response. Thanks for reading this one...it is secretly one of my favorites of mine lol.

[Frieda P]

I wonder if it was the same pontificating blowhard? ha

[icelandicblue]

Could be...

[icelandicblue]

I hope not though I have left 2 different sites because of the smelly old codger.

[Kenaz]

I agree that form is stuffy, unless you cannot stop yourself from doing it haha. When you write with form and meticulously pick every word to fit perfectly I believe it becomes more of a blocky art-form and less of an expression. Poetry should be whatever comes to you, nice write.

P.S. you switching between 7 and 8 syllables sort of seems like satire here! Very good

[icelandicblue]

Ah thanks- ha- I didn't know that I switched between 7 & 8 syllables because I never count them. I write what "feels" right which might be sacrilegious! Thanks so much for reading. I just wanted to prove that I could do it if I really really tried. ; )

[Kenaz]

I am no way opposed to writing out of form, nice work though

[KAOlmsted]

Ahhhhhahaha...wait...I rather like form. Then again, there is something to be said for just letting the words flow. I guess I'm on the fence with that, depends on my mood. One thing I do know...rhyming gives me a migraine. You did it well, here, though...all of it...well done.

[icelandicblue]

Hi kimmer,
I like form too but it's not the only way to express yourself as some seem to think. This was a response to another "poet" who told me my work was not poetry because it had no form. I wrote this as a retort to his criticism. No one has the right to tell another how to write. If I don't like a poem I just don't bother to comment. Thanks so much for reviewing the poem.

[KAOlmsted]

The pen truly is mightier than the sword. Good on ya. I hope he learned a valuable lesson ;-) read moreThe pen truly is mightier than the sword. Good on ya. I hope he learned a valuable lesson ;-)

Always my pleasure, blue.

[Carolann Dowsett]

Poetry should be accepted as it comes out, it is a form of personal expression, of deep emotions and broken souls. Whether it rhymes or not is mute. Nicely written.

[icelandicblue]

Thanks so much! I agree wholeheartedly.

[Carolann Dowsett]

Welcome :)

[Alex Falkner]

love it.

Screw them all,
Screw them all,
The long the short and he tall.

Sorry, had to add that in for the hell of it.
Part of a piss-take song I heard a few years ago that jumped into my head.

[icelandicblue]

LOL- thanks for making me laugh.

[first second third]

I TOTALLY AGREE!!! in school and in what ever poetry is judged by others and say all poetry is supossed to rhyme. well i agree with you when you say "screw you!"

[icelandicblue]

Thanks so much.

[Naomi Bloom]

The first stanza confused me until I remembered the prosodic definition of foot. Now I think it's quite witty. I love your title, too.

This is brilliant! I definitely know the feeling. I think poetry has evolved enough that it isn't necessary to write exactly the same as Keats or Wordsworth. We need to move things forward. Traditional poetry is still beautiful, but it shouldn't be the only thing you are allowed to write. You definitely hit the nail on the head with this piece.

[icelandicblue]

It's not that I don't appreciate the form used by some of the greats, it's just that I don't see the world that way. Thanks so much for your input I appreciate it.

[Naomi Bloom]

No problem. :)