waiting

about missing people you loved

I will wait for you

though life carries you like a leaf

in an autumn breeze

away from me

 

I will watch you

as you dance in brilliant colors

unaware of my awestruck gaze

unaware of the growing distance

as you spin and twirl away

.....farther away

 

I will wait for you

though you dance to drummers

I cannot hear

and you follow them to places

I cannot go

 

I will wait for you

though I know the wind

will not change its direction

 

I will watch for you

though the last of the leaves

have long since blown away

 

I will wait for you

because......

because......

because there is a place here

that is empty

 

and it’s shaped like you

Reviews

[Sarah McKeever Hitt]

I think it is quite safe to say that this is gut wrenching beauty. Thank you for inspiring us to be just a bit better. Well inked sir. Well done indeed

[jacob erin-cilberto]

this reminds me of my best friend, Paula, who died in 1984 at the age of 27---

way too soon...she was colorful in so many ways and lit up my life.

thanks for this.

the irony of an empty place shaped like you...that works really well to end this piece.

jacob

[bob, small b. aka invs]

loss is a really s****y part of life. it's always too soon to lose someone you love, no matter what the reason.

[Heather]

oh how beautiful this is, my eyes drank every word like a delicious treat. Definitely a favorite for sure

[ba_mcfarlane]

jeez bob, what can i say...I love all your stuff. However, this one is special. Best of your stuff I have seen so far, not that I'm a big deal expert. I love it...wish it was mine! I like it when you shorten it up like this one.

[olla]

I have the same problem as you.. there are many holes in varying shapes and sizes.. they shrink over time but are still there.. I like your poen very much..

[bob, small b. aka invs]

thank you for your comments. it's nice to know i'm not the only one plagued by these things.

[eglantine]

Great, strong, imagestic (not a word, but I'm making it one lol) start but then it seems to trickle down and lose it as the poem goes on.

The ending seems too cliche with the hole shaped like the missing person...

I do love comparing the person to a fluttering leaf being swept away in a mass of fall colors. that is beautiful.

thank you for sharing.

[bob, small b. aka invs]

thanks for the comments. i see what you mean about there being a difference between the beginning and ending of this poem. as far as the ending being cliche...maybe. but how many ways are there to express that personalized emptiness? these aren't even ghosts. ghosts have more substance. these are voids that no one, nothing else can fill. that was the best description i could think of.

[eglantine]

I know, it's a challenge lol.

[bob, small b. aka invs]

shouldn't you be busy writing a novel?

[eglantine]

..........about that lol

[Lily Mae]

This is beyond beautiful.. it has touched my heart deeply. The "I will wait for you
because......
because......
because there is a place here
that is empty

and it’s shaped like you"

sigh.. I so know..and I too will wait..xo

[bob, small b. aka invs]

it's been a while since i wrote this. that empty space is still there but it's not as painful. now it's more like.... see that empty space there? it was once filled with an extraordinary person that i'm so lucky to have known. still, i wait and hope.

[Lily Mae]

I understand that also.. I wonder if that void can ever be filled. Maybe someone will come along and heal and grace that space or I wonder if we are mean't to always know it and feel it in life lesson form.. hmmm I hope the void is able to heal..xo

[bob, small b. aka invs]

i think other people (including the ones who left the void) think of others as milestones on a journey. something to take note of and move on. lessons to be learned. experiences to have had. no loose ends. simply that page completed, on to the next. i wish i could think like that.

[†Tracey†]

I know this feeling all to well and never in a day could have so poetically shared them.. very beautiful from the heart and soul..xo

[bob, small b. aka invs]

thank you for the kind comments.

[†Tracey†]

Anytime..x

[Athera Rose]

Very beautiful and heartfelt poem.

[Mark]

This reminds me, if in a more heart-wrenching fashion, of something I wrote over thirty years ago, entitled, "Ode to an Un-met Love". The feeling of knowing the She is out there, though as yet you do not know her name, or where "Somewhere" is, is at once terribly frustrating, and consoling. I get the impression that this is an elegy to someone you knew, or thought you knew, who has chosen to become No-Longer-Available to you. That may be a worse scenario than the previous....

[bob, small b. aka invs]

very astute impression you got from this. yes. it was an elegy to a ship that passed in the night. a friend. an infatuation. moving on is not something that i take to very well.