A Dreamer's Journey

A Dreamer's Journey

A Poem by Iris Jayne
"

Something i came up with while thinking about the next school year.

"

The foot’s always hard to find

Keep searching

The right mountain’s out there

Search before you climb

Search the world

Search your heart

Search your dream

It doesn’t matter if you find it last

It’s not a question of who gets there first

It’s just who gets there

It’s not a question of who wins

Who loses

Who gets all the prize

It’s about who survives

And who’s happy

Keep climbing

Clear the way

Meet people

Choose paths

The end’s not near, but it will come

Pant

Sigh

Walk, run, fly

Laugh

Cry

The journey’s long, yes

But the end will come

Learn the art of courage

The storms will push you down

Down…

Down…

Until you reach the bottom once more

But keep climbing

Keep dreaming

Keep searching

The end is nearer this time

It will come

Your time will come

Pant

Sigh

Walk, run, fly

The world will be beneath you in a while

Do not walk against the wind

It will push you down

Down…

Down…

Walk with it…

The zenith is just a few sunsets away…

One more step

And the end is here

The end has come

Your time has come

The game had stopped

Marvel

Relief

Success

The cape, the scepter, the crown

But bliss will fade

It doesn’t do well where man and sky meet

Because on top of the world

All roads lead down

Down…

Down…

Until you reach the bottom once more.

 

 


© 2010 Iris Jayne



Author's Note

Iris Jayne
please review! second attempt (EVER) on free verse. and poetry in general, actually. im more of a storyteller. thanks!

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...
... it's obvious that a lot of effort has gone into this write ... it's well-written ... it just sounds a bit didactic ... i think philosophically speaking ... maybe ... that we all know this ... and what we're looking for is not what to do ... but the how of it all ... the human mind knows that it has to endure ... but how to build resilience is what one seeks to learn ... i also don't agree with the fact that going "down" is inevitable ... it's a great attempt though and you have ample skills ... (not rating the write) ...

Posted 7 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

I like the philosophy of this poem. Back when I was in school, I remember one of my teachers telling about the 'Mountain', that all people are climbing a mountain. There are different paths, some scenic, some more direct, but we are all on a mountain. I liked this analogy and later on I modified it into my own version of Joseph Campbellian philosophy. (Which, by the way, if you've never read any Joseph Campbell you should, Hero with a Thousand Faces is my favorite book so far.)

I totally agree with you that going down is inevitable. Our hero journey always ends in death, no matter what, but its what we do in life that determines if that downward journey is, in reality, a return home, returning to your people with the knoweldge of the zenith.

Keep honing your poetic voice, even if you never write poetry later in life it'll help your prose.

Posted 7 Years Ago


obviously, this has been written just after a few minutes of inspiration. and it's great the way it is. i don't think it's really instructive or didactic of some sort. i mean... we all did want to know what to do first instead of the how. i love the flow and the repitition.

Posted 7 Years Ago


I liked it--it's a sentiment that is hard to disagree with. Making suggestions, I might say that you could add more punctuation. My favorite line was "The cape, the scepter, the crown"--the rhythm was nice and the images fit well.

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Well after you reach the bottom. Only one way to go. That is up. I like the flow and the story in your words. We battle each day of life to figure the right and wrong of a life. Your description was very good. A excellent poem.
Coyote

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

[send message][befriend] Subscribe
...
... it's obvious that a lot of effort has gone into this write ... it's well-written ... it just sounds a bit didactic ... i think philosophically speaking ... maybe ... that we all know this ... and what we're looking for is not what to do ... but the how of it all ... the human mind knows that it has to endure ... but how to build resilience is what one seeks to learn ... i also don't agree with the fact that going "down" is inevitable ... it's a great attempt though and you have ample skills ... (not rating the write) ...

Posted 7 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

Wow i thpought this to be beautiful and inspiring. great write1

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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Added on June 2, 2010
Last Updated on June 2, 2010
Tags: dream, ambition, journey, inspiration, life

Author

Iris Jayne
Iris Jayne

Candon, Philippines



About
Sometimes I think I babble too much. more..

Writing
Love. Love.

A Poem by Iris Jayne