WALK AWAY

WALK AWAY

A Poem by Jeff Bresee
"

A little something for change in the new year.

"

I wonder

I wonder

I wonder why it goes

I deny it

Try to fight it

Against the way it flows

I ignore it

I deplore it

Try to push it far away

But I fear it

I'm too near it

And it haunts me every day

For circling in the skies are things

I wish I could disguise

That melt to crystal teardrop

And it makes me realize

That I’m part of it

Not above it

And I’m not the way I was

Oh, I hate it

Execrate it

And everything it does

So I’ll change it

Rearrange it

Try to start another day

Then I’ll stop it

Yeah, I'll stop it

And I’ll turn and walk away

 

…Jeff Bresee


© 2012 Jeff Bresee



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Love the rhythm of the lines .. can hear it so clearly. Not sure if this poem is intended as lyrics but could so easily be ..

'And it makes me realize That I’m part of it Not above it And I’m not the way I was Oh, I hate it Execrate it And everything it does ' .. don't we all feel like that sometimes about something .. trouble is we can't put it as finely as you have!


Posted 7 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

Dear Jeff,

Again the meter is extremely interesting and well executed. And the repetition works very well. I would, however, break this into stanzas. It just helps the reader.

Now to the subject of the poem. Very nice. It's a "reader-fill-in-the-blank" poem. This could apply to so many things. And it is so appropriate for the New Year with its New Year's resolutions.

Very nicely done. Glad to be now aware of your work.

Very best regards,

Rick

Posted 7 Years Ago


I ardently deplore repeated lines in poems... for they immediately detract from the overall piece, and so in a silly fashion... however, I cannot find a single fault with the rhythm of these lines. The interminable 'it' points to no one thing, but could be anything. If that was your aim, then laurels be thine.

Posted 7 Years Ago


It certainly catches your eye, layout, wording. A poem I enjoyed reading, thank you.

Posted 7 Years Ago


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JRB
nicely put, enjoyed the read

Posted 7 Years Ago


I have read that the best way to get rid of anything unhealthy in life is not to fixate upon it in an effort to eradicate it, for then it looms even larger in your consciousness... the best way is to replace it with something healthy, so the desire for it is not so present....... easier said than done! Good luck with that!
I love the rhyme scheme...i agree it would make a cool song.

Posted 7 Years Ago


This is great. Love the way it flows and the rhythm that it has. Like the subject too. It reads like life can be like always changing and our mixed feelings about all the change.

Posted 7 Years Ago


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A
I love the upbeat feel I get from this! This piece would make a great song. Great piece!!! :)

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Well, this was a piece that I really enjoyed reading out loud. I like the wording, the flow and the message. Something you can't seem to run away from and yet that is the very thing you need to do...just trying to find a way...Great write!

Janice Ann

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Very nice.. it flows and speaks volumes in not too many words. Then the ending a slight turn.. :)

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Not a fan of the rhyming part of it, but I love the meaning behind the words. I'm debating, though, whether or not the ending was meant to be so... well the wrong choice, to me it is at least. Just something to think about. Nicely written.

Luna

Posted 7 Years Ago



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Added on January 1, 2010
Last Updated on April 28, 2012

Author

Jeff Bresee
Jeff Bresee

Dallas, TX



About
I love to write poetry and then turn it into songs. I am a singer/songwriter for Weathered Pages, a Fort Worth, Texas based band. Check us out at www.weatheredpages.com And I hope you enjoy .. more..

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