A dream of my old house in Hillsdale mi!!!!

Well this is a dream i had on 3-17-12 all that is in it was my dream the whole dream hope you like it .;...

Dream I had on 3-17-12

Dream of my old house in Hillsdale Mi,

I had a dream,

A dream that I was at my old house in hillsdale Mi,

With my boyfriend and a bunch of other people,

I didn't know what to think,

We were having lots of fun,

I seen my old cat kasie,

My orange and white cat,

He was scared,

I was chasing him up the stairs trying to get him,

And then finally I caught him,

I held him tight,

I was petting him and he new who it was,

He was happy to see me again,

We were all exploring the house ,

Hanging out and having so much fun.

The End,

BY:Jennifer Little

Reviews

[~*Moody Thursday*~]

Oh, I thought this was a poem. Yeah, it sounds more like a dream or journal entry. Pretty cool.

[Kenneth S.]

Very cool.

[Amila Jay]

A very nice dream :))

[Ashley Rivers :)]

I bet it was great to see your old house, whether it was in a dream.
Great job! :)

[Mina]

A charming dream! Smaller animals tend to shy away from me, but I'm still an avid animal lover. :)

I'll just give you a brief run down of the little things I saw that you might want to look at and perhaps edit if you think it's necessary. Sorry if it's too brief, but I know that writers enjoy hashing out the details themselves, and I'm sure you're no exception! :)

In line two, I think you forgot to capitalize [H]illsdale? And I suppose if you wanted to get into the technical details, you could put a comma after the city name, between Hillsdale and MI. And since names are capitalized, you could capitalize [K]asie as well.

This one's a little grammatical slip - line six. In keeping with the dominant tense of this poem you wrote, you might want to tweak "seen" to "saw," so that the sentence is "I [saw] my old cat, Kasie."

There's one more little typo in line twelve. I think you meant to type "knew" instead of new, as in "I was petting him and he [k]new who it was."

Again, charming dream! My dreams are often a bit too strange to really put into words, but it must be very satisfying to be able to recount the peacefulness and contentedness you felt when waking from this particular dream - keep writing! :)

-Mina

[LadyNaida]

Interesting dream. I have dreams about this apartment I use to live in and am usually in the back porch and the porch starts to fall apart with me in it. I can't stand that!

[AK]

Awesome dream! I wish mine were so vivid and wonderful..

[Starrleena Magyck]

what a beautiful dream...

[Cascara (aka Sprint Goe..]

awwwwwwww....

what a happy write!

[CandyFirex3]

I think its a really sweet dream you turned into a poem quite nicely.