I'm better off without you

It's hard letting go but sometimes it's for the best. Enjoy!

Two years ago with you
I felt like how I could find someone who I want to marry
On that Sunday afternoon, in the fall time at the park
When you knelled down on your right knee
Asked me to take your hand in marriage
Showing me that shining heart shaped diamond
I did not have to think, I thought it was an automatic yes
All of my feelings were controlled by your actions
We ignored each others flaws
Even though I would think something is wrong
We use too make love all night in ever room of your house
All of my thoughts were always of you
When you used to kiss my lips
I used to taste your sweetness tingle all over my body
Our whole worlds felt fair
You completed me and made my loneliness disappear

Until one day it seemed like all our love disappeared
No matter what I tried to say that night
You took it the wrong way
We fought about everything and anything we could for two hours straight
I never thought I would take my wedding ring off
Crying my tears out while you throwing daisy flowers at me
I was sitting on the floor shaking, shivering by my brown sofa  
Red veins popped out in your hazel eyes
You walked over to me, not to pick me up
You whispered, “This is over”
While kissing my left rosy check
I scream, “SORRY”, nothing worked
Angrily you took my ring and left for the door
That night I knew it was a goodbye

For two months straight, I could not do anything
My heart became numb from all the depression
I felt like sleeping forever
Since I did not have enough guts to shoot myself in the chest
I tried to call, text, email, I even showed up at your door
However, you were never home, giving only me no responses
I felt like my phone was broken
The manger at the store said it was not
I gave up on you , us, myself
I would lay in my bed twist and turn all night long
Rolling around in my imaginary thoughts and tears   
Everything I did, everywhere I went reminded me of you
But the distance made it easy to let go
Not knowing what else to do
I deiced to get out of my dilemma

Two weeks after our two month break, I received a phone call from you
Saying that you are sorry, the other girl you were with hurt you
That you really love me, I still make your sunshine appear
My eyes filled up with tears of joy
I gave you another chance to meet me at a fancy dinner at 8pm
I dressed up head to toe, with my most sexiest black dress
With red three inch heels, and padded bra
Waiting I got to the dinner place on time, and took a seat to wait for you
Waiting, and waiting for twenty minutes later
You show up with daisy's, Daisy's!? I exclaimed?
You said you wanted to make everything better
Looking into your eyes, I cannot believe your lies anymore
Nothing felt the same
Even though you did look very sexy in that tight black pants
With a pressed white button up shirt
Dinner was still so awkward
Sitting at the table waiting for the check
You insisted to go back to your place
Just thinking of that made me sick
Your hazel eyes keep playing my mind with more lies
I put on my red lipstick
I walked up from the table
To kiss your lips, wiping my makeup on you
I felt even worst after kissing you
I whispered, “Now I’m walking away. This was wrong, goodbye again for the final time.”
I left the daisy and I did not even help you pay for the bill
You never came after me, but it’s fine
I turned around a few seconds later to see you wave goodbye
So did I

Since two days has passed, every second without you is superb
Without your presence here I really feel pleased
Every time I think about you my brain hurts
You caused me more pain
Than someone shoving toothpicks up their nose
You made my heart burn in pain
More than someone jumping in front of a train
Every moment without hearing from you
Are the moments I look forward too
I’m going to be fine with my life.

Author's Note

You guys should listen to "Just a feeling"- Maroon 5. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iQSFEKz4MKI

It's a wonderful song. Tell me what you think of my piece and song.

Reviews

[Warrior]

Great story telling. This did justice in the realm of getting the message across. Great message. There's lot of times where a story can have a great message to aim for, and have a lot of under lining things but then no one gets it, and if no one gets it, then the point has failed. But in my opinion this did well to get the message across. You made it clear, which is why I think it's good. Keep up the good work. What was also great was that I could imagine the story as I read it, and that is also a strong point of stories. The ability to have the reader imagine it because after all we're reading not watching it, but it was as if I was there as I read this, and that is great. Good job once again.

[Megan]

gah. I love this! I love how she is finally able to see through his lies, recognize the truth, and walk away with confidence, and how she has been all the happier since. I love how it shows that someone can come out of their sadness and find happiness :)

[Elemenopy]

You have a pretty good story here. I like the descriptions you give of how the narrator felt after the breakup. And I liked even more how she then realized what she was made of and moved on with her life. It is a solid plot, if nothing else. I did not see many mistakes, and I found it to be a quick and easy read. Keep writing.

[Jeff]

Great story! The imagery was superb.

[Karli]

Okay, honestly, my eyes were glued to my screen. It went deep inside the mind of a broken-hearted soul, and showed how she moved on. So good!!!

[steph]

This piece made me cry, its so bittersweet and wonderfully wriiten. adding this to favorites

[r]

Ohemgee!!!!!!! I loved this so dang much I think I literally died!!!! It is so freaking amazing and awesome. I love the way it flows, it tells such an amazing story of love and heartbreak and joy and sadness and all that good stuff. This was so well written and I don't know what else to say other that this is an amazing work!! I luffles it!!!

AND OHEMGEE!!! I WUVVLES THAT SONG TO DEATH!!!!!

[Moflo]

This was a fantastic story...eligable of epic proportions. Really you made a nice poem out of it, and I think that takes even more dedication, so this was very nicely done.

[+Naomi+]

LOVED IT! It was sad but then it grew to her realizing that she doesn't need him...Wonderful, Wonderful work.

[Calypso]

sad but wonderful