silently does it

silently does it

A Story by Juliespenhere
"

please be gentle tired and late... but need to write we all know that feeling!!!

"
She caught the lift up to the 32 nd floor.
Her work was always such a bore
the man got in as
she got out he tipped his head
then smelt something not quite right
By God in Heaven does she drink stout?
the lift door gently closed
she got out as red as rudolphs nose
the fart was silent
it wouldnt smell well that was what she thought
well my lass only time will tell.
the man got out
at floor 22
the crowded party got in all jeering almost laughing at
him
that fart had stayed all 12 floors down
they thought it him who went to town
He saw her later
at the lunch time queue
yes she was ordering tuna and onion
and radishes too
what was it that made her silent farts
maybe the gas just had to laugh

She saw him stare
so smugly there
well ill not take this anymore
i cant help my bodily functions
she walked right past him rude as day
she would silently fart him away
she stood next to him as if to speak
the loudest fart
came out like Dantes Peak
she walked away
he stared at her
her skirt was stained
a shimmy of tan he saw
so neatly there
her silent farts
had gone to brown
he silently sat and ate his
toasted rye of brown with smoked salmon dill
so snacking on its deliciousness there
he thought
i hope she goes to chemist and buys
a fart free pill
of all the women on these 50 floors
shes the one that I just adore


As he watched her silently walk to the opening crowded lunchtime lift he knew he was glad he had his lunch to pick

© 2018 Juliespenhere



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Reviews

Don't doubt that some men will run up and down stairs now.. failing that, stand stock still and think of home! You crazy woman, is nothing sacred!!! By royal decree, fluff here and there but say nothing, just blame the nearest dog!

Posted 4 Months Ago


Lol- well better out than in - top or bottom- and I did read that farting is good for blood pressure- true story🌹

Posted 4 Months Ago


Juliespenhere

4 Months Ago

Lol I also read if u smell your partners u live longer
‘Thoughts In Time’🌹

4 Months Ago

Lol- survival at its best- lol🌹
Just for fun
Just for fun

Posted 4 Months Ago


=] lol, this is funny.
My new favorite fart poem!

Posted 8 Months Ago


Juliespenhere

8 Months Ago

Thanks so very much
Thank you so much for imparting a hilarious roar that will have me chuckling all week! *har-de-har!* I love toilet humor especially when done in a slightly-subtle & classy way as you've done here. This is so good, now I want to craft a fart poem too. Your imagination is off the charts & your playfulness is refreshing! (((HUGS))) fondly, Margie

Posted 8 Months Ago


Juliespenhere

8 Months Ago

Lol thanks Margie looking forward to yours now 🙂
A surprise ending to the poetry. I liked the situation and I liked the honest woman. Thank you Julie for sharing your amazing words and thoughts.
Coyote

Posted 8 Months Ago


Juliespenhere

8 Months Ago

Thanks for your review
Coyote Poetry

8 Months Ago

You are welcome Julie.
Aye, a hilarious poem to be sure... Very Australian...... It may be wrong but that smoked salmon bit made me hungry. Well penned and good sense of humour... Though I won't be taking a elevator with you anytime soon lol. G

Posted 8 Months Ago


Juliespenhere

8 Months Ago

Lol not about me just made up fiction ha ha thanks for review 😏
This is a light hearted jeer at life itself something we can admit to maybe some can some are repulsed but I like to cover all avenues in life glad I’ve seen the back end of this (excuse my dreadful pun) 😇

Posted 8 Months Ago



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8 Reviews
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Added on January 27, 2018
Last Updated on January 27, 2018

Author

Juliespenhere
Juliespenhere

Sydney , Australia



About
Amateur old poet well not that old but not a young 20 anymore I still work full time and live to write I write at least five poems ditties every weekend I write quickly it just flows and.. more..

Writing

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