silently does it

please be gentle tired and late... but need to write we all know that feeling!!!

She caught the lift up to the 32 nd floor.

Her work was always such a bore

the man got in as

she got out he tipped his head

then smelt something not quite right

By God in Heaven does she drink stout?

the lift door gently closed

she got out as red as rudolphs nose

the fart was silent

it wouldnt smell well that was what she thought

well my lass only time will tell.

the man got out

at floor 22

the crowded party got in all jeering almost laughing at

him

that fart had stayed all 12 floors down

they thought it him who went to town

He saw her later

at the lunch time queue

yes she was ordering tuna and onion

and radishes too

what was it that made her silent farts

maybe the gas just had to laugh

She saw him stare

so smugly there

well ill not take this anymore

i cant help my bodily functions

she walked right past him rude as day

she would silently fart him away

she stood next to him as if to speak

the loudest fart

came out like Dantes Peak

she walked away

he stared at her

her skirt was stained

a shimmy of tan he saw

so neatly there

her silent farts

had gone to brown

he silently sat and ate his

toasted rye of brown with smoked salmon dill

so snacking on its deliciousness there

he thought

i hope she goes to chemist and buys

a fart free pill

of all the women on these 50 floors

shes the one that I just adore

As he watched her silently walk to the opening crowded lunchtime lift he knew he was glad he had his lunch to pick

Reviews

[emmajoy]

Don't doubt that some men will run up and down stairs now.. failing that, stand stock still and think of home! You crazy woman, is nothing sacred!!! By royal decree, fluff here and there but say nothing, just blame the nearest dog!

[‘Thoughts In Time..]

Lol- well better out than in - top or bottom- and I did read that farting is good for blood pressure- true story🌹

[Julie McCarthy (juliespenhere)]

Lol I also read if u smell your partners u live longer

[‘Thoughts In Time’🌹]

Lol- survival at its best- lol🌹

[Julie McCarthy (juliesp..]

Just for fun
Just for fun

[several thousand]

=] lol, this is funny.
My new favorite fart poem!

[Julie McCarthy (juliespenhere)]

Thanks so very much

[barleygirl]

Thank you so much for imparting a hilarious roar that will have me chuckling all week! *har-de-har!* I love toilet humor especially when done in a slightly-subtle & classy way as you've done here. This is so good, now I want to craft a fart poem too. Your imagination is off the charts & your playfulness is refreshing! (((HUGS))) fondly, Margie

[Julie McCarthy (juliespenhere)]

Lol thanks Margie looking forward to yours now 🙂

[Coyote Poetry]

A surprise ending to the poetry. I liked the situation and I liked the honest woman. Thank you Julie for sharing your amazing words and thoughts.
Coyote

[Julie McCarthy (juliespenhere)]

Thanks for your review

[Coyote Poetry]

You are welcome Julie.

[Glen's not so clean sla..]

Aye, a hilarious poem to be sure... Very Australian...... It may be wrong but that smoked salmon bit made me hungry. Well penned and good sense of humour... Though I won't be taking a elevator with you anytime soon lol. G

[Julie McCarthy (juliespenhere)]

Lol not about me just made up fiction ha ha thanks for review 😏

[Julie McCarthy (juliesp..]

This is a light hearted jeer at life itself something we can admit to maybe some can some are repulsed but I like to cover all avenues in life glad I’ve seen the back end of this (excuse my dreadful pun) 😇