South Branch River Line

The Dozen Challenge

 

Framed in stone, the limp body

below Blue Hole was draped

in water grass. Railroad crews

sent word upstream. Foreign

 

workers were buried the same day,

notice sent to the chargé and maybe

family could be found back in Istria,

or Taishan. Reasons for death

 

never given: “The idiot couldn’t swim,

wades in to bathe on the smooth, flat

rock and currents claim the newest offering.”

Only his blasting gang feels the loss.

 

The tourist train’s metal is a vocal ache

at two o’clock; hands point cameras

at the eagle nest as they pass the grave

no one knows. Fledglings tear at a fish.

Reviews

[Tovli]

choppy! like a river; awesome use of metaphor. loved it. tovli

[papaed]

wow... a tragic drowning of an anonymous foreign person, near a tourist train. A lot of story in a few words. Great imagery. Great solution to the 12 words. Thanks for sharing.

papaed

[Sheila Kline]

You have done a masterful job with the 20 words as part of the challenge....you have a concise message, and it is told in interesting form.....

I like the way the story unfolded, and your ending is excellent!

Nice write!