Someone Cared

Sometimes I just wish I could run away and hide
 no matter where I go though these feelings stay inside
 how can I stay here and live each day a lie
 when all I want to do is close my eyes and die
 I see the pain I cause you with every tear I shed
 I plead with you now babe let me go instead
 I wish I could take you with me to a happy place
 whether it exist though is time for me to face
 can I ask for your forgiveness for you to set me free
 it may seem ungrateful but this life's not meant for me
 thank you for all your love for all the time we shared
 it means the world to me to know that someone cared

Author's Note

please comment back with reviews and tell me things i could do to improve my writing

Reviews

[ANTO]

I dont know about improving your writing. You have your own style and if it was to be pinged full of punctuation then it wouldnt be yours any longer Kayamon - unless punctuation and structure is what you want to impose on it, I'll be glad to help to whatever extent I can.

As it stands your writing is direct and raw and to the point, which are all qualities that seem to be inherent - thats your natural ability. The sentiment in the piece is clear. The pain is too great and the subject needs release. Its all there. The gratitude is there too for being lucky enough to find someone who cares.

I've read about 5 of your works but only commented on this one because I like to get a feel for a writer but I'll be back, so if I send you a friend request I hope you'll grant it for me.

Thanks for sharing

[StarlaFireDelta]

sweet