November 13; I remember you.

I rode my bicycle to your house that morning
The smell of Summer lingering in the air
A kindly reminder of hope and new beginnings
After the long and damp darkness of Winter.

I rode effortlessly down the main road
With my heart on my handlebars
And my love for you pumping through
Each cycle of the bike pedals.

In my pocket sat a gift.
I had saved you a piece of the sky
And had wrapped it tightly in some old tissue paper.
I had written your name on the top
With a black marker
And had surrounded your name with a heart.

I wanted to show you
How much you meant to me.
I wanted to take the whole sky for you.
I really did.
But I could only fit a small piece
In my pocket.

I remember arriving at your house
And seeing you hold my gift in your hands.
You seemed to hold it in your hands for what seemed like forever.
Just staring at it.

I remember beads of sweat forming on the back of my neck.
Not from nervousness. No way.
The thought of rejection hadn't even crossed my mind.
It was Summer. I was hot.
And anything was possible.

I remember looking into your eyes and seeing sadness.
Why sadness? I had thought.
I remember seeing your fist slowly clench
Seeing the clouds slowly dissipate
Seeing fragments of azure
Crumble between your fingers.

They say that it is far better
To have loved and lost
Than to have never loved at all.
Yet I wonder.
I wonder if that is remotely true
Or if it is just another one of those things that they say
To make you feel better.

I remember riding back home on my bicycle.
I was riding so fast. The fastest I had ever ridden.
The wind was billowing in my hair
Although I was thankful for it being there, because it dried the tears running down my cheeks.

I remember cursing the sky
For being so beautiful
For even existing at all
And for reminding me
Of you.

I think...I'm not bitter...
I'm just...broken.
What else do you think I should say?
Well...I guess...I wish you hadn't destroyed my sky...
As a piece of me broke too
That day.

November 13.