Chapter 5

March 1, 2013

I ran into Mr. Jackson today. He looked pretty excited to see me but he could see in my eyes that I didn’t have the same feeling towards him. I can’t stand fake people. Don’t come smiling in my face when you know good and well that you don’t even care for me that much. Mr. Jackson knows that he doesn’t like me. I know he is mad about that argument that Alaina and I got into the other day. I didn’t even want to explain my side because I already knew that he was going to find some wrong in what I did. He never gives Alaina any punishment. She’s perfect in his eyes; she got him wrapped around her whole finger. Alaina isn’t perfect, Alaina is a demon, and she is just a very sick, twisted, ill minded girl.

My mom was right about the Alaina though, she is very smart. Not only is she smart in school she is smart in this situation. She knows the power that her dad holds, and she is just keeping him away for now. She knows that her Uncle knows all kinds of district attorneys, judges, and police marshals. If she wanted in serious trouble there would be nothing I could do. But she just has to escalate the situation a little bit more, as of right now, I can get in some trouble for my situation with Alaina, but not in a lot, and it just so happens that Alaina wants me in a lot of trouble.

Alaina has this stupid friend named Michelle, she is a short chubby looking girl. She isn’t all that bright; I’ve known her since my freshman year. We always seem to have classes together and it always seems that we sit next to each other. She hates me though; maybe even more than Alaina. The only reason she hates me is because of Alaina. Alaina is using her. She is using Michelle to get back at me. Alaina knows she can’t say anything to me personally because she will get in trouble; so she uses Michelle say what Alaina wants to say tom. Michelle is a very weak minded girl, Alaina is a very bright girl, and in this world; when you mix a dominant personality with a small personal, the dominant personality is going to walk all over the small one. So in this case; Alaina is walking all over Michelle; Michelle does whatever Alaina wants.  

Most people would think the situation between Alaina and I would be easy to handle. All I have to do is just keep away from her, if I see her coming my way I just have to turn the other way. It sounds easy, but it’s not, Alaina is evil and she will do whatever it takes to get me in trouble. She doesn’t care about anything, not her friends, not my friends not anybody. She is just going to keep doing what she wants to do.

I just don’t have time to be dealing with this right now; my mom is dying and I need to figure out what my next move is going to be. Alaina just needs to stay out of my way and keep my name out her mouth.

I think I have this situation in control though. It’s going to take a lot more than a couple of immature teenage girls to get me angry. Alaina doesn’t know me, she knows nothing about me. She doesn’t know my fears, my secrets or anything.

I wonder what her secrets are. Such as what happened to her parents? Why does her last name not match anybody else in her family last name? What I most wonder about is why Alaina doesn’t look like anybody in her family? She is dark skin and everybody else is light skin. I know she has secrets and other things that she is hiding. I just wonder what they are. But I need to stop before I end up revealing one of my secrets; stuff I hide to myself. There are just certain things about me that people will never know; and if people were to find these things out about me, I would have go away from this place; go far away; very far away.

 

March 17, 2013

Mrs. Jackson; the wife of Mr. Jackson; pulled me out of class to have a talk with me today. The only reason the school let her do that is because of who her husband is. I really didn’t feel like talking to her but she made it seem as if it were important so I just followed her lead until we reached an empty room in the main office. The only thing the room had was a desk and a few chairs; it looked like the type of room that you would only have meetings in. But to be honest I was kind of scared, I was wondering what this woman was about to say to me. She was giving me a look as if she was about to pull out a knife and jab it in my throat at any second now. I would of kind of liked it if we had a third person in the room with us because I knew in my heart whatever was about to happen wasn’t going to end well.

Mrs. Jackson and I have a whole different relationship then Mr. Jackson and I. Mr. Jackson likes me as a kid, deep down I can tell that he really does care for me and my future, but Mrs. Jackson tolerates me, I tell by the look in her eyes, she doesn’t like me one bit. Her and my mom seem to be good friends though, they often talk and have dinner with each other. Mrs. Jackson originally didn’t want me at Mr. Jackson program though, she wanted Mr. Jackson to deny my application to his camp in the mountains. But Mr. Jackson said no, he gave me a chance and for that he will have my respect. But you can tell   Mrs. Jackson is like a mom to Alaina, she is there to support everything Alaina does; and the last thing she is going to let happen is some random black teenage boy ruin her niece’s life.

So as I continued to sit in the empty room with Mrs. Jackson she just kept looking at me. I don’t know what she was thinking but I’m more than sure they weren’t good thoughts. This was starting to become a little funny to me. Here we were in this quiet room and she is over giving me the most meaning look possible. She wasn’t even saying nothing. After a while I couldn’t help it any more I busted out with a laugh that I had been holding in for the last 2 minutes. She didn’t seem to like this though, her eyes started to focus on me, she took a deep breath and she decided to finally speak.

“Ladanian; what is going on between you and my niece?”

“When you say niece are you talking about your niece Alaina?” I replied to her very sarcasticly, she was wasting my precious school time, so I felt as if I was going to waste hers.

“Don’t you dare play games with me Ladanian, I’m tired of your games; and I’m telling you this right now; I won’t allow you to play your games with Alaina, my husband, or anybody else in my family. I’m tired of this conflict and I’m tired of you. You think I’m just going to let you do whatever you want and get away with it. This isn’t a game Ladanian, were talking about people’s lives here.”

“It’s not my fault your niece is an insecure, manipulative, black demon. I never did anything to her. Have you once ever seen my come up and complain to you about Alaina; she started this whole situation, she is the one that’s completely wrong in this situation. I never even knew Alaina before this situation even started, I just found out about her. So don’t you come at me like I’m the bad guy here.’’

“First of all you watch the way you talk about my niece, don’t you dare disrespect her like that. Second of all it doesn’t matter who started this situation, I have people watching you Ladanian, I know your following Alaina around, because that’s what everybody is telling me. Everytime Alaina signs up for a club or program; and then you out of nowhere sign up. She can’t do anything without you being right there where she is. Ladanain tell me this; why is that you are the only boy who has this problem, nobody has these kind of problems here at this high school. So why is it that you are the only boy at the school with harassment problems? Tell me that.”

 “I don’t care if the whole freaking school is watching me; if I say I’m not doing nothing to this stupid niece of yours, then I’m not doing nothing to her. Alaina really has some maturing to do; just because she sees me around a lot doesn’t mean I’m stalking her. I mean come on now be reasonable; were talking about a school that is the size of a parking lot. We have a maxim of about 1500 kids. I would be surprised if I didn’t run into Alaina. I mean think about it, were both sophomores with honors classes, meaning were going to have the same classes with the same teachers. So of course were going to see each other; has it ever occurred to you that Alaina and I have the same goals. So maybe that means we will have a few programs, clubs, and classes together, but that doesn’t mean I’m stalking the girl. And who said that I wasn’t allowed to be in programs and participate in school activities. I have just as much as a right as Alaina does, what did you think I was just another one of these ignorant black kids here on the streets. Im different you know, at least I’m trying to be. I bet the first time you saw me you had already made your prediction about me didn’t you. Just another ignorant black kid that will cause harm to this society. That’s all they see when the first meet me, they judge me before they even get to know me.”

“Ladanian I have known you ever since you were a little boy, I knew you way before you knew me. I know everything about you, and I know that this isn’t the first time that you were accused of harassing a female, you even have some sexual harassments cases that you have been accused of. So don’t try to play the innocent good boy card with me. I know who you are Ladanian, I know your mother, I even know your father.”

“What are you talking about? You don’t know my father? You don’t know nothing about me or my father.”

“Your name is Ladanian Eric Frenchman, you were born March 27, 1997, you have lived here your whole life. Your mother’s name is Ciara Lee Wilson, she divorced your father way back when you was younger. Speaking of your father, His name is Eric Gabriel Frenchman; he has been bounced around all over the country and was abandoned to live on the streets at the age of seventeen. I also know that you father is a big time drug addict, he got away with murder back in 2006, he lives on the streets now, you can find him by the bus station.”

“How do you know all that; and what do you mean he got away with murder, my father didn’t kill anybody. How do you even know about the murder he got mixed up with? If there is anybody that is a stalker it’s you.”

“Ladanian maybe your mother will tell you all that; there is obviously a lot that you don’t know and you need to learn. Listen to me closely Ladanian, when I first found out that you would be attending this high school, I did everything in my power and my husbands power to make sure you couldn’t attend here. But by the grace of God the school admitted you in because there was nowhere else to send you. It wouldn’t have been right if I just let you go to one of these ghetto high schools where you wouldn’t learn anything. I just had to face the fact that eventually  you and Alaina would cross paths; and it so happens that you guys did cross paths. Some idiot managed to put you and her in the same English class. I’ll never forget the day Alaina came running into my office crying; saying that some boy named Ladanian Frenchman has been harassing her at school; I just wanted to shoot myself in the head. I allowed you two to come in contact with each other; and then I paid the consequences for it. But at the same time it was a good thing; I thought you two were going to fall in love with each other or something. That would’ve been horrible. It would have been a disaster if you guys ever became friends.”

“Mrs. Jackson you are really starting to confusing me, what are you talking about? You really need to explain to me how exactly you know me and what you know about my past that I don’t. Are we related or something, what is it that you are not telling me, I need to know. Maybe there is a way we can fix this between Alaina and I, why is it that you actually want us to be in conflict? Why do you want us to be fighting.”

“Don’t you worry about none of that Ladanian, you should ask your mother anything you want to know. Alaina doesn’t know about any of this either and I expect to keep it like that. I want your mouth shut. Now it’s time for you to get back to class, but there is just one more thing I need to tell you.”

“What?”

“Stay away from Alaina, stay far away from her. I’m warning you Ladanian, unless you want some serious drama to unfold in your life; I suggest you stay away from my niece. I don’t know how to get this into that childish brain of yours any easier; but if you keep this nonsense up Ladanian; I will have you arrested for harassment to a minor. Now get back to class.”

I nodded off Mrs. Jackson and scurried back to my class. As soon as I stepped foot in there the bell rang and school was over. I quickly grabbed my books and walked home. I took the short way today because I didn’t feel like walking through all that traffic. I had a lot on my mind; I was just trying to put all the missing pieces together.

How does Mrs. Jackson know all that about my family and I? How does she know my father? How does she know about that murder trial he was in? Why does she want me so far away from Alaina? What is the real reason Alaina doesn’t like me? Why hasn’t anybody told me anything about what is really going on? I hate being kept from secrets.

There is only two people that I can gain information from; my mom and my dad. Lord knows where my dad is and my mom; well I’m not trying to put her through all that today. She’s very sick. The last thing I need to do is put more stress on her. I just need to what’s going on.  I have been left out on a lot of information and I need answers.

What happened that I’m not being told about, why haven’t I been told about this, and one last question that means everything; how will this affect my future?

 

March 21, 2013

I have been creeping around the house a lot lately. I’ve been watching her every move.

I need to know what Mrs. Jackson was talking about the other day. How does she know me? What is it that my mom is keeping from me?

I’m totally frustrated right now because I want to know what is going on but then I don’t want to know what’s going on. It’s obvious that I can’t handle the truth; nor do I want to know to know about it. But you don’t get everything you want in this world. I need to know what my mom is keeping from me. If she doesn’t I’ll be forced to ask my dad; but his stories is so twisted I don’t if he’ll even telling me the truth.

As for right now I’m just going to leave it up to my mm to tell me. She has to tell me. I deserve the right to know the truth of what happened between us and the Jackson family. I’m going to ask her, and she will tell me.

But right now isn’t the right time, it looks as if she is looking for something. She looks really stressed right now so I’m just going to lay off for a bit. But as soon as she finds whatever she is looking for I’m going to ask her. She’s going to tell what’s going on. I need to know, I deserve to know, but at the same time I don’t want to know.