state of grace

my first love and my only love

We were too young to be
caught in a state of
grace during the summer.
Eleven weeks hiatus from
everything that went wrong
freshman year of high school.
I know it wasn’t planned,
but I don’t regret it happening.
Mayday Parade’s still my favorite
band; I remember each second
of you with me during
every other second of that stupid angsty playlist.
The drum beats could’ve been my
heartbeat; the words could’ve
been yours.
I stopped feeling lost
that night - I felt like you
found me, even though
that road would have
been treacherous if we were
anybody else.

So you flew me to places I hadn’t been
and that night is as close as
we ever got to having our own song.

Didn’t regret being fifteen
and young and stupid for a couple hours.
No, we shared a bottle of whiskey; felt like
amber fire in my throat because we
were witches they were gonna burn in the morning,
but it was anesthetic that kissed my stomach too.
We’re numbers in each other’s pockets, but not a
phone call away.
So you should take care of
yourself after I leave,
‘cause they might just
light us up
if they ever find out.

Reviews

[Vivian Fisk]

Oh, how I loved this poem. I knew exactly what you meant from the very first: an illicit physical love between two barely adult children during the warm freedom of summer, having gotten through the terrible awkwardness of freshman year; being lost but then found by someone wonderful for the first time, at long last; having contact info (we're numbers in each other's pockets) but not being able to communicate because of the nature of the people who might "light us up" if they ever found out. This is from the heart, I can see, and it made my heart ache in memory of those lost days which were much more painful than I like to remember.

[Saige]

I am SCREAMING because this is exactly what I was trying to say and you’re the first person to understand the more subtle memory/meaning (whatever you want to call it) behind this poem

[Vivian Fisk]

Well, I guess that tells you your poem is a success for the people who have an ear to hear. Not to mention very beautiful....

[Amanda Hakes]

You use some very fascinating imagery, but the anecdotes are fairly unspecific so the imagery doesn't land as solidly as it could. Consider that the more specific you are- the kind of specific that moves past drumbeats feeling like heartbeats and alcohol burning your throat- the more likely your audience is to relate.

[Justin]

that was really good :) sometimes all relationships dont work out rather it is friends or romantic, it is the sad part of life :( great job :)