Hallelujah-1

inspired by the Jeff Buckley track titled "Hallelujah" while trying to enter a poetry contest =]

Sunshine is Missing

Write to the Lord

He may shower upon us.

Author's Note

Open for criticism

Reviews

[JENY]

Wow…..simple, humble…beautiful…..truthful

[indu]

well, i couldn't get the 5-7-5 syllable.. didnt mean to disgrace the Haiku :/
and the idea was like, it is raining. and you pray to god. and what does he do? shower his mercy upon us.. and ..tada..we get the sunshine. :D
i think i would edit it a bit :)

Thanks JH, i really appreciate your reviewing :)

[José Humilde]

Is this itself a haiku? It's my understanding that a haiku's syllables goes 5 7 5. This goes 5 4 7.

The piece itself is nice. The only thing is I get a bit confused. Why exactly would I want the Lord to shower upon me, when sunshine is missing? I'd say, I'd want Him to back the sunshine!

Either way, thanks for sharing!

-JH