"I'll Stand at the Edge of the Earth and Sky"

"Beyond the horizon"

Grab on the beams of hope, don't kiss goodbye,

When those pungent screams I hear, whips may wound 

I'll stand at the edge of the Earth and Sky.

This fate may be queried by lots of why's

A tempest scourge me with mordant boulders

Grab on the beams of hope, don't kiss goodbye.

Climbed summits,battled hail, those endless cries,

Engulfed by the quagmire see no escape

I'll stand at the edge of the Earth and Sky.

Crystal fragments of quartz catches your eye,

Scintillating rainbow spellbinds

Grab on the beams of hope, don't kiss goodbye.

Rammed beasts of Hades; wail your cries.

The scent of victory is here

Grab on the beams of hope, don't kiss goodbye,

I'll stand at the edge of the Earth and Sky.

Reviews

[Kathy Van Kurin]

"I'll Stand at the Edge of the Earth and sky"
L.C. Jarrette,
Each poetic metaphor and image is simply a unspoken
message of nature's voice to our inner reality.
You touched on several beauties!
I liked the following lines:
"A tempest scourge me with mordant boulders."
"Engulfed by the quagmire see no escape."
Then these two lines following, were just beautiful!
"Crystal fragments of quartz catches your eye."
and
"Scintillating rainbows spellbind."
Hopes song really sings here at the end:
Rammed beasts of Hades; wail your cries."
"The scent of victory is here."
"Grab on the beams of hope, don't kiss goodbye."
"Ill stand at the edge of the earth and sky."
Really well written and inspiring!
bless you much!
Kathy

[Jerome Malenfant]

Maybe I'm dense but I don't understand what the poem is trying to say.

But anyway, "Grab on the beam" sounds odd. Maybe "Grab onto the beams" or "Grab ahold of the beams" or "Grab the beams".

[L.C. Jarrette]

oh...i hope someday when you read it again you will finally understand what it says...
:)

[Rathore]

Amazing piece. The beams of hope touching the horizon are worth standing on. The spirit of struggle and scent of victory can be seen in the nicely chosen diction and images. I liked it.

[L.C. Jarrette]

hello sir,glad to see you here.thank you very much for reading!

[L.C. Jarrette]

sir please add me as one of your friends...hehe :)

[Najam Us Saher]

This poem is filled with beautiful phrases and I loved the message....

[A little flame]

Such exciting imagery and such a lovely rythm!

[L.C. Jarrette]

thank you again for your kind words...

[A little flame]

Your welcome!

[Elizabeth]

Wow, this is amazing. The repetition the spot on and the imagery is just perfect. Amazing poem

[L.C. Jarrette]

thank you darkmist...

[Mr.Writer]

The repetition is awesome! I loved it!
It enhances this amazing poem and engages the readers even more!
Fantastic poetry...
Keep it up

[L.C. Jarrette]

thank you..i try

[Raven Moonchild]

This poem is absolutely fantastic and I can see this being the start of a book and a song. :)

[L.C. Jarrette]

thank you.i had help from a very kind mentor.the guy with a black cat on his shoulder.
:)

[Raven Moonchild]

I know that metalhead. :) He's pretty awesome.

[L.C. Jarrette]

haha!yeah he is.

[Raven Moonchild]

But he hates caramel. :(

[L.C. Jarrette]

...........................
:) hehe

[Raven Moonchild]

You're on the caramel hating train too,aren't you? :(

[L.C. Jarrette]

no, i love caramel. do you like caramel?

[Raven Moonchild]

Duuuuuuuuuude,I LOVE caramel!!!!! Especially salted caramel. :P :D

[L.C. Jarrette]

haha! same here. and I'm not a dude.i'm a girl
:)

[Raven Moonchild]

My bad,madame, I call guys and girls "dude".

[L.C. Jarrette]

it's okay..

[Raven Moonchild]

But hey........caramel,right? :)

[William Liston]

I enjoyed this. The vocabulary is strong, the imagery is mind-gripping, the rhymes flow well, the syntax and grammar are spot-on, and, to top it all off, the font choices match the strength and intensity of the poem perfectly.
Along with the technical aspects, I also like how this piece could be interpreted in different ways by different readers. The theme of grasping for hope is clear, but the situation the characters are in is something left for the reader to decide. I interpreted it as two lovers enduring hard times.
I have one question: Did you derive this poem's structure from the Villanelle? It resembles it in many ways, but reads like a more loose, modern adaptation of the traditional form.

- William Liston

[L.C. Jarrette]

yes sir..you are correct - villanelle. i was thinking of trying to change my structure and then later realized how difficult it was to compose it. but it was worth it.

[Chase Dylan]

The scent of victory is here... Wail your cries, rammed beasts of Hades... A tempest scourge of riled mirth... Very powerful word-choice, coupled with strong emotion peppered throughout... Moving imagery... Triumphantly penned

[L.C. Jarrette]

hi thanks silente for reading.are those your corrections?cause if it's okay with you I'm willing to change the phrases.
:)

[Chase Dylan]

Oh, nonono... Not at all... Not any corrections... Was just an impromptu appreciation of your stellar work, friend... Do not change what you do not need to change...! Just trying to show my appreciation with rhyme... Was inspired by you...!

[L.C. Jarrette]

too late! i already changed it. :D

[L.C. Jarrette]

no, it sounds way cooler.haha! thank you so much!!

[Chase Dylan]

Oh... Well all right... I still liked it the other way... But I am glad that I was able to help... If inadvertently...