Prologue

Heartbreak, rage, sadness, hate. (Also be warned, there's cussing in it) ((And also suicide warning))

Do you love me?” She asked, her voice cracking like her heart, tears rolling down her face.

“No. I don't. I never have, and I probably never will, i'm sorry.” He didn't sound sorry. His voice was icy, cold, vicious, soulless enough that even the devil would admire it.

“Why don't you love me? Am I not good enough!? You were just USING me this WHOLE time were not you! Have the months we spent together meant anything to you? You said you loved me...” She was crying now, clutching her chest. Heartbreak, rage, sadness, hate. Those were the only emotions coursing through her body and mind at that moment. She gasped in air between sobs, she couldn't stop.

The boy suddenly stopped and reached toward her. She stepped back fast, and cast one last look at him before she turned and ran. She didn't know where she was running or when she was going to reach it, so she just kept running and running.

Heartbreak, rage, sadness, hate. She finally stopped. She looked up from the ground, her arms by her side, her head cocked and eyes squinted in confusion. “Im...home?” Her voice was hoarse and scratchy from crying. She slowly walked up her long driveway, into her house, not looking at the metal plaque that read orphanage on her way in. She went up the stairs, and finally into her little room on the left side of the hall, the rest of the girls in the house were asleep. She closed her door, locking it for equal measures. Her phone sat on her bed, where she left it when she went out, like a parent would for a child out past curfew. The same as her parents would, if she had any. She sat on her bed and slowly grabbed her phone, staring at the blank, black screen for a minute. The phone began to ring. The girl jumped and squinted her eyes to see the name. C-O-L-E. “Cole..” The name came as a cold, hard schock. Her voice cracked again, and more tears began to stream down her face.

Heartbreak, rage, sadness, hate. She let the phone ring, not answering it, but not declining it either. When it stopped ringing she looked at her notifications. 17 missed calls from Cole, 5 texts from him, 3 from the guardian of her orphanage. She placed her phone, screen down, on her bed. She stood up and walked over to her sink. She looked in the mirror, barely recognizing herself.

She did a mental check. Name? Juniper Watson. Age? 16. Relationship status? She froze, her heart hurting. She turned on her faucet and splashed cold water on her face. She lifted up her face and looked in the mirror again. Her brown eyes were raw and red, brown hair that was straight when she left was now tangled and frizzy, her body dropped with exhaustion and her face was unable to run away from her frowning expression. She was usually pretty, but not tonight. She walked back over to her bed and picked up her phone. She unlocked it and looked at the messages from Cole.

I'm so sorry June, plz just talk to me. We can still be friends, right?

C’mon June Bug pick up da phone, u cant ignore my calls 4 forever

June plz, It’s important, pick up

Babe I'm sorry that we had to end that way, give me another chance and i'll try 2 love you more and be a better bf

June pick up the f*****g phone please! Are you off with another guy or something?? Jesus whatever, bye.

June stared at her phone for a minute, tears dripping onto it. Her phone started ringing and she screamed, chucking her phone at the wall.

Heartbreak, rage, sadness, hate. The phone hit the wall with a crash and fell to the floor, screen destroyed, the plastic around it looking just as bad. Glass surrounded it. She dropped to the floor mimicking the phone on all aspects, sobbing heavily, and curled into a ball. She tore off the cute blue dress she was wearing, leaving her in a tanktop and shorts.

She continued crying until she heard a soft knock on her door. “Juniper? Are you ok? Its Elizabeth, I heard a crash and was worried.” June sat up and composed herself as best as she could.

“Im fine Elizabeth, it was just my phone.”

“Your phone?! How the hell was that your phone??!!”

June thought about her answer for a minute and gave in with a sigh. “Because I threw it against the wall.”

Elizabeth was quiet for a moment. “...Is it broken?”

June looked over at her phone with disinterest. “Demolished.”

Elizabeth was quiet for another moment. “June, can you unlock the door, please?”

June stood up and walked over to her door, unlocking it, and stepped back as her friend/ fellow orphan walked in. Elizabeth’s eyes first traveled to June’s phone. “Damn, you weren't kidd-” She stopped as her gaze landed on her friend’s face. “Woah, June, what’s wrong?” A tear rolled down June’s face and she walked over and sat down on her bed.

Elizabeth followed in pursuit and sat down beside her. She pulled her knees up to her chin and faced her friend. “Cmon J, don't leave me in the dark, what happened?” June took a breath, slowly exhaled, and mumbled a single word, a name. “Cole.” Elizabeth gasped and she looked at June in astonishment. “Oh my god, what happened?” June looked down at her hands, she seemed intent on remaining quiet.

“Juniper Clarissa Watson, I swear to god if you don't answer me then i'm going to go downstairs and get the Guardian.” June flinched, the guardian would be pissed that she was out past curfew. She gave a sigh, closing her eyes.

“I loved him, you know that we had dated off and on for a while, and this time the breakup was worse, so much worse. He told me he never actually loved me and never will, that it was all just a lie.” She glanced back at her phone, tears gathering in her eyes. “He called and texted a lot and when I didn't reply he practically called me a w***e and said I was off with another guy. But I wouldn't do that since he was my first time and I love him. So I got a little angry an-”

Elizabeth waved her hands and halted her friend. “Woah, woah, woah, placement of words. Did you just say first time, as in sex first time, with someone else besides him? One. Wowza totally dick move on his part. And two. Did you f**k him?! Cause that is so not ok, J. He’s a high school boy, don't f**k em unless you marry em. But honey Im so sorry, I know what it’s like to give everything to someone only for them to use you and hurt you in the end.”

June looked at her friend again., she had a way of seeming so many years older even though she was only a few months older than June. She doesn't really understand. Heartbreak, rage, sadness, hate. June gave her a hard look, locking down her emotions, she knew nothing about her or Cole.

“Get. Out. Of. My. Room.”

“What?”

“Get the f**k out of my room, Elizabeth!”

“Woah, woah, just calm down, whats wro-”

“Don't tell me to f*****g calm down! Get the f**k out now before you turn out like my f*****g phone! You don't understand anything! I loved him!” June was screaming now. Heartbreak, rage, sadness, hate. Elizabeth slowly walked out of June’s room, giving her friend a sad look. June rushed to her door and locked it. She was crying again. Heartbreak, rage, sadness, hate. Heartbreak, rage, sadness, hate. Over and over and over again on repeat.

June clutched her head, it hurt, her hands traveled down to her heart, it hurt worse. She ran over to her bathroom and opened the cabinet. 3 bottles, one had 20 pills, the second had 3, and the third had 36. She poured out the contents of each of them on her bed. It hurts. “I don't want it to hurt anymore.” June whispered to them, herself, and the air around her. There was a bottle of water beside her. She grabbed up a handful of pills at random and popped them in her mouth, taking a few gulps of water following it. She did it a few more times until all of the pills were gone. The bottle of water was empty now, and she laid down on her bed. After a few minutes her eyes opening and closing slowly, like a child avoiding sleep. She was tired, she couldn't keep her eyes open and couldn't think straight. Her head buzzed.

Heartbreak, rage, sadness, tired.

Heartbreak, rage, tired.

Heartbreak, tired.

So tired. June tried to speak but ended up mumbling randomly.

She heard a knock on her door. She couldn't get up, her body was heavy, her breath was heavy, yet so quiet. She heard faint murmurs from the other side of the door but couldn't make out what they were saying. She heard a small click and her door opening. June’s eyes were closed, she tried to open them but only succeeded in opening them a sliver of the way, even that was a struggle. Through her eyelashes she saw three blurry figures, two looked female and the other a tall male. The Guardian. Mr. Thomas, her legal guardian, rushed over to her bed and picked up two of the three pill bottles. He turned towards the others, June closed her eyes again. She still couldn't understand them as they spoke. She felt someone pick her up and rush out of the room, but she couldn't open her eyes, couldn't speak, couldn’t move. She tasted flesh and felt herself throw up. Still couldn't open her eyes. After a second, everything went black.

Bright lights shone in her face when she could finally open her eyes. Am I dead? She looked around. Everything was still blurry. She saw a chair, and someone was in the chair, head lying beside her, hair sprawled out across the blankets. She looked around but couldn't get anything else from her surroundings, so she just closed her eyes and listened.

She heard beeping, and breathing, and people talking in the distance. On a hunch, she opened her eyes and looked to her right. A heart monitor. Her breath caught in her throat. She wasn't dead. She looked down at the person in the chair beside her and squinted, trying to make out who he was. Black jacket, brown hair, tan skin, male, short messy hair. Familiar. She racked her brain for the person of this description but her thoughts were all fuzzy and scrambled. She paused. Wait, mental check. Name? Juniper Clarissa Watson. Age? 16. Relationship status? She paused, and it hit her. Cole. Cole was the boy next to her. She lifted up her arms and pushed him off of the bed, her arms felt weak and sore but she didn't care. Heartbreak, rage, sadness, hate. Cole hit the floor but woke up in time to catch himself with his arms. He got up and looked at June, surprised. “June bug...are you really awake?”

June tried to speak but could get out more than a whisper. Her hands went to her mouth, there was a tube in it. She pulled out the long tube, constantly gagging. When she finally got it out she was breathing heavy. She tried to speak again but this time found her mouth was too dry. Why the hell does the world have so many challenges?! Cole rushed over to a table on the other side of the room. He grabbed a cup and poured some water into it. He rushed over and put it up to June’s lips. She drank it greedily until the cup was empty.

She cleared her throat to speak but Cole stopped her final attempt at speaking. “I can't believe you're finally awake...wait, I should call a nurse or something!” He pressed a call button above her bed. June looked at him in anger for interrupting her final stage of talking, but then it was overtaken by confusion of what he said. “What do you mean “Finally awake”?” She was taken aback by how weird she sounded. Her voice was scratchy and was a lower pitch and was weak as if she had not spoken for a while. She noted that Cole looked different too. His hair was longer and his face had a subtle beard coming in.

A nurse walked in, looking down at a chart. “Mr. Anderson, please tell me that is isn't another ‘eyelash fluttering false ala-” She abruptly stopped when she saw June sitting up in the bed. Cole smirked at her. “See, I told you, 18th birthdays are always lucky.” June looked stunned. 18th? What was he talking about? The nurse suddenly rushed out of the room and came running back in with a tall, handsome looking doctor. “Oh..My...God.” He gaped at her before rushing over to her side. “Why hello there, Juniper. I know you’re probably very confused right now, and maybe thirsty and hungry, nurse have Wendy get right on that. I suggest not standing up or trying to walk because your limbs are very weak and you may experience nausea or pain. So dear, to try to clear some confusion up, you have been in a coma for almost two years.” He looked at her sincerely, way to break hard news, just come out and hope for the best. “We were starting to think about moving you to permanent residency. It’s a miracle that you have regained consciousness when you have.” She felt sick.

June looked over at Cole, a tear running down her face, this was hard enough to take in, but him standing right there was worse. “What the f**k is he doing here though?” The doctor looked at Cole in confusion. Cole looked just as confused until he realized what she said and meant. “Oh...the night you came into the hospital is probably still really fresh to you huh, since you’ve been sleeping for two years? Look i'm sorry about that night, I shouldn't have said that or sent those texts. Everything I said was a lie, I was just so scared of losing you that I ended up hurting you before you hurt me. Fatal flaw I guess. But I DO love you and I just want another chance to show you that.” More tears ran down June’s face, but her expression was pissed off and stone cold.

Heartbreak, rage, sadness, hate. She began shaking, like she was in a freezing cold tundra. The doctor looked at her in panic and turned to Cole viciously. “Mr. Anderson, please leave, you’re upsetting Juniper and if you don't leave now then there could be serious health complications, this is too much for her when she has just woken up, especially with you since this is technically your fault.” Cole looked at him in surprise then walked out of the hospital room in defeat, he looked to be on the verge of tears. The doctor turned to the still shocked nurse. “Lacy, if you could please run a vital on Ms. Watson, we need to make sure that there isn't anything wrong with her, and we need to set up physical therapy immediately, and remember to get Wendy on food and drink duty.”

He turned toward June again as the nurse rushed to do as she was told. “Poor dear, you don't even have any family to look after you, since the orphanage is no longer your legal guardian. But don't worry, everything will be ok darling. We’ll still notify them in case they know of somewhere that can shelter you.” He gave her a reassuring smile and walked out of the room, leaving June alone in a world two years into the future. Wait, better now than never. Mental check. Name? Juniper Clarissa Watson. Age? 18. Relationship status? Single for two years due to a coma. She groaned, wiping tears from her face. “Great, just fantastic.” She felt tired. She closed her eyes, drifting asleep.

Author's Note

Lots of cussing in this one, tell me if I should cut it out or tone it down or whatever. And also I realized that I have a way of making the stories turn like really fast but i dont know how to change that really or if I even should.