I Truly Don't Belong Here

I truly don't belong here
Nobody can hold me dear
Started when I was only 4 years
Continued to this very time here
Everywhere, I pull up the rear
Hide from every single peer
All run from my personality sheer
Far too many find me to be queer
And seemingly invoking nothing but fear
I inevitably shed a tear
Forgetting the voices that I hear
As I turn to life, and begin to leer
Off the path of success I veer
Finally falling to the bottom tier
Nobody giving me their ears
And alas, as I look in the mirror
All I can see is darkness near.

I truly don't belong here.

Author's Note

I won't be tagging my poetry; I don't think it's good enough to have earned them, so those of you lucky enough to look at my profile will get a chance to cringe at my poor poetry! 🤣

Reviews

[A.L.]

If your poetry was dreadful, you would have been too ashamed to post. You know you're an excellent writer. Confidence is not wrong, just accept the truth. :)

This feeling is worldwide. The mere fact that every writer on this site has written poetry expressing the same concept, proves it. Since you're a fine writer, I dare you to write something new. Bless my feed with your brilliant mind and a different concept.

[Dismal]

The idea and story that goes along with the poem is beautiful and I can see many people including myself can relate to it but I would try to have more substance instead of just continuously rhyming off of one word...
Other than that it is very good!

[Prototato]

That’s actually one of the things I criticized myself the most for in this poem. Fun facts

[Carol Cashes]

Cringe? Not likely, this is very, very cool and quite achievement rhyming every line and keeping it in context. Some lines are choppy, but if it was spoken - say rapped or slam poetry, the speaker could speed up or slow down to make it work. Carry on, young poet, carry on....

[DarkArtz 0703]

this sounds like it would be a hella epic rap though neat piece

[Aeco]

I enjoyed the rhyming scheme within your poem but honestly it seems to be a bit... flat? It's saying a lot and the appearance of the poem is quite large but it doesn't seem to hold and a lot of substance. Perhaps for this poem and other writings you might want to show more. I'm sorry if this review seems a bit unhelpful but this is honestly the best I can say.

[Prototato]

I made that intentional and I'm glad you noticed!
It's showing something quite depressing and, in the end, the tragedy just becomes a simple fact. It's dull because emotion has been removed both in the poem and in real life.

If that makes sense. I suck at explaining things. :P

[Aeco]

I see. If that is what you were going for then you did a good job at conveying it. Quite the somber reality then. It reminds me of the quote, One death is a tragedy, a million is a statistic.

[Prototato]

Indeed.
Here, this may be a bit easier to understand than that jumble I posted above:
(S)He knows (s)he won't fit in, and (s)he has accepted it. That killed his/her emotions.

[Aeco]

Did you construct a poem around this? Or did you create this "summary" in restrospect?

[Prototato]

I did construct the poem around it.
I was actually in that kind of a dead mood when I wrote it; I tend to either reflect the mood I'm feeling or the mood you wouldn't expect in my writing.

Didn't need that long of an answer, but hey - I try.

[writ rajat]

NO NO NO ITS GREAT POETRY

[Hitchopotamus]

Promised a cringe, I confess myself disappointed..no cringes to be found but a couple of eye-brows raised at your impressive poem! One rhyme throughout a poem is difficult to harness successfully but you've achieved it.
Not that I'm one to talk but it's worth thinking about your punctuation and the rhythm of your middle lines but a fantastic poem keep 'em coming.

[Vasilees Sybissyl]

It's not poor poetry, it's actually pretty good. Anything that expresses emotions in a different yet beautiful manner is good poetry. Remember, practice makes perfect, so keep writing!! Well done!!