Pattaya

Sin City of Thailand

In the land of the Thai called Pattaya Beach

Where the prostitutes roam and the ladyboy creep

We soon find ourselves in this mystic ol' town

With plenty of fun to be given around

At the Hard Rock we begin! With excitement we squeal

"Where should we go for an authentic Thai meal?"

"This place looks nice, let's check this one out."

"That beef is raw!" As we let it fall out the mouth

That was not fun but to the Strip we shall go!

"Pay 3000 Baht to see the ol donkey show!"

"Count us all in!" As we threw down the cash

Next, I drank coke she opened with her a*s

Markers, pong balls, razors. Oh dare I say more?

Who'd ever thought that's what a p***y is for?

We thought we were safe when we were done with strip

But that didn't stop She-men from grabbing my dick

Impossible to walk those streets uncontested

One minute you're fine and the next you're molested

With still so much to do, we drank and closed our tab

We went to the street to wave down a cab

"Tiger! Elephant! I take you all there!"

"Yea that's the plan, just tell us the fare!"

"100 Baht and you can drink in the back!"

F**k yeah! In America, you can never get that

To the tigers we went and boy did he drive

We're all pretty lucky to still be alive

Pet the tigers we did, even tickled their nuts

Probably would've killed us if they weren't so drugged up

Elephants we rode, oh boy what an act

Reach down and pet them, they feel like ball sack

From there we drank more, then to the market we went

To part with the Baht we haven't yet spent

"500!" No, 300! Take it or I walk!

"For 350 I'll throw in some socks!"

Sold mother f****r, now lets wrap this s**t up

Don't want to be late for the Liberty Bus

1 bus, 2 bus, 3 and the 4

We all loaded up as Marines kissed goodbye to their w****s

Our heads slowly nodding as we head towards our ship

But all we could think was: "What one hell of a trip..."