The Hangry games; part three

Eight remain, two by two the friends have died. Will it be two again? Or will it be more?

                Picture the thing, if you will. A vast stadium. Not a soul to be seen upon the scene of stands. The robots on site inciting a fear; a soulless clapping is here to hear. It’s a ceaseless clatter like tins and pans, the mettle of their souls is as metal as their hands. They cheer for the death and sing for the dance, false copper voices of false copper fans.

                Right, now I’ve got the poetry off my chest let’s get back to our eight friends.

They were caught like rabbits in the middle of all this madness, a roundabout made of rockets was spinning between a group of two and a crowd of six. Well. Five and a half. Nabila is only tiny.

                “What do you think we’re supposed to do here?”

                “Dance?”

                “I’m not going to dance just because they tell me to!”

                Beneath the spinning missiles a collection of mounted lasers swung about on three-hundred-and-sixty-degree mounting. Soon, everyone had a red cross hair fixed on their chest.

                “I may well do some dancing; just because they’ve told me to.”

                “I don’t want to do it!” Amelia had picked up Nabila, who had tried to make a run for it. “We cannot continue to let these people push us around!”

                “Ladies and gentlemen, looks like we have a player out there who doesn’t want to play the game!” The sports announcing was audible throughout the stands.

Beneath the sound of the song a very clear robotic voice spoke.

                “Non-compliant participant identified.”

                A rocket whizzed out of the device towards Amelia. Instinctively she raised Nabila as a shield and the mysterious forcefield protecting Nabila sprung to life absorbing the bulk of the blast. The explosion was clearly designed to take out only one person, Amelia was safe. She dropped Nabila, astonished at her own instincts and started to dance. Nabila giggled.

                “Oh no you did not just use my daughter as a human shield.” Tan raised her arms to wallop Amelia but a disharmony of robotic voices was speaking.

 “Non-compliant participant identified.”

      “Non-compliant participant identified.”

“Non-compliant participant identified.”

“Non-compliant participant identified.”

                “Oh, what have we here folks?” The announcer sounded entertained “Nobody’s dancing and everyone’s a target!”

                They all hastily got their boogie on.

                Tan started to dance her way towards Amelia, incorporating a kind of karate chop motion into her routine. Amelia moonwalked away, looking alarmed.

                Niamh was moving like a dance-floor genius. Robert was struggling to overcome pain and pull off his usual super cool easy style dance routine. Alicia was attempting to dance while sober, not a feat she often embarks upon. Anna had tucked herself into the footwell area of the car, correctly calculating that without a clear path for the laser to reach her the targeting system wouldn’t be able to lock on.

                Nabila was jumping up and down excitedly in time to the music (well, she thought she was jumping up and down. In reality she was bending her knees and bobbing).

                Robert fell to his knees gasping, unable to fight the burning in his arm.

                The laser locked on.

                “Non-compliant participant identified.”

                Robert squeezed his eye tight shut.

                “Oh, Lord Father God,” He muttered to himself. “Please protect my friends when I am gone. Have mercy on my soul.” He felt a wild fear, knowing his death was upon him.

                The rocket fired.

                A swift blur leapt between Robert and the laser. The beam was broken. The targeting system recognised compliance. The projectile was deactivated and fell with a weighty thud. It happened to be flying over the car at the moment it switched off and so it landed on the bonnet of the vehicle. It lay there in an indentation made by its weight, red smoke leaking out of the powered down missile.

                From the haze emerged a sight of unparalleled glory. Was he angel or devil? He could bump. He could grind. His whole body was fluid. He was an avatar of energy, dancing wildly between his friend and danger. No Lord of the Dance could ever call themselves his equal.

                Angphu was King of the Dance, protector of the fallen.

                “Guys!” Amelia called out as she moved around the car. Tan and she were playing here-we-go-round-the-mulberry bush in time to the music, practically jogging around the car. “I’ve got a plan! Do you remember the farmers market we passed on the way over?”

                “The one you insisted we stop at even though none of us wanted to go?”

                “Yes, that one.” She s**t-dropped to the boot lock as she passed it.

                Slap! Tan lunged in and landed a strike on Amelia’s arm.

                “You - Don’t - Use - My - Daughter - As - A - Shield!” Each word was punctuated with a slap to Amelia’s body.

                She showered Amelia in blows and the poor woman yelped and scrabbled away. Tan landed the last slap on the retreating figure, accidently striking Amelia’s backside.

                “Giggidy” Niamh grinned and Tan stopped beating Amelia, blushing and scowling all at once. Amelia travelled all the way around back to the rear of the car.

At the farmers market they had purchased fruit. Amelia grabbed a pair from the boot.

                “Nice melons Am.”

                It’s an old joke in the group. You know how it is. You can’t beat the classics.

She tossed (giggidy) a melon into the air and a laser site tracked it.

                “Non-compliant participant identified.”

                A firework launched. The homing device span about in mid-air following the fruit and the melon exploded in a magnificent cloud of green smoke.

                “Guys, melons can’t dance!”

                The targeting circuitry was designed to track mobile objects and destroy anything that had a movement not falling within the dance algorithm parameters. Whether or not Amelia discovering this loophole was sheer luck or rare genius is really not for me to say.

                “Well, well, well, they’ve come up with an interesting tactic but will it pay off?” The commentator carried on his observations.

                She hurled another one, which perished in a purple conflagration of sparks.

                Everybody reached for random objects, incorporating the grabbing into their choreography. Lots of object they tried were too small to register on the system. Bottles of beer and wine seemed to do the trick though.

                “And that,” Amelia yelled, hurling a bottle as hard is she could. “Is what should happen to all the Blossom Hill in the world!”

                It shattered when impacted. A rain of glass surrounded everyone as bottle after bottle went up. More than a few people were scratched by chips and fragments flying through the air.

                Suddenly everyone realised they had nothing but the alcohol-free beer left.

                “D****t we’re going to run out of drinks to throw soon.” Niamh was strutting her funky stuff as she cursed. “What should we do?”

                “We’ve got food.”

                “Let’s not use the food.” Angphu didn’t even pause mid Gangnam style. “Don’t know how long we’re all going to be here.”

                Nabila had been squealing and bouncing in delight as she watched the glasses explode amidst the strobe lighting and dance music. There was a pause in the entertainment and she stood there, grizzling in annoyance.

                “Non-compliant participant identified.”

                A laser focused locked on to her.

                “Nabila, nooooooo!” Tan leapt in between her child and the rocket-launcher. In her panic for Nabila she forgot to dance.

                “Tan, she’s got a force field, remember?”

                “Oh yeah, she has, hasn’t she?”

                BOOM!

                “Well would you look at that! The mother throws herself under the bus to save her child. How noble.”

                Nabila clapped her hands, delighted by the entertaining sight of Mummy exploding. I don’t think she’d quite wrapped her head around the concept of other human beings feeling pain, or indeed the notion of mortality. This to her was no different to seeing Mummy fall down the stairs - a site that never failed to make Nabila laugh.

                A cannon shot fired for Tan’s death.

                Bored of dancing Nabila ran forward on her little legs to the source of her amusement, the missile launcher mounted on the tall pole.

                The targeting system sent several missiles whizzing towards her. They impacted on her shield as she made her way forward.

                “Oh, this one’s not playing by the rules! Forcefield’s in the dance area? Disqualified. One of her friends will have to pay the price.” The stadium voice laughed.

                Everyone felt a thrill of horror as they realised one of them was going to be killed in punishment for Nabila having a forcefield.

                Oblivious, the child ran all the way to the weapon mount. She felt the metal curiously as fire and thunder rained down from above. The pole was too close to the blast radius and it was pulverised by all the artillery that was bouncing off Nabila. The whole device fell like an enormous weaponized tree. The remaining fireworks went of in a terrific conflagration of fire and noise.

                “Oh bollocks.” The sports commentator sounded annoyed. “We didn’t think of that.”

                Once again, the little one had saved everyone’s arses. She was like the R2D2 of the group.

                The stadium began to power down. The robots stopped moving in their seating and the overhead lights switched off. The shades of dusk were cast over the pitch. The dance-floor went dead.

                “What was Tan doing when she jumped in front of the rocket like that?” Robert wondered in a neutral tone.

                “Mummies have instincts that make them act before they think.” Amelia said. “With all those fearsome feelings they’re allowed to do silly things some times.”

                “Easy there, Backhander.”

                Backhander was sometimes Amelia’s nickname; on account of how her compliments came out a little off-target from time to time.

                “What happened?” Anna had dragged herself out of her hiding place. She still looked awfully pale.

 

                The others were ready to explain, but Alicia insisted that they all go inside. She made Anna sit down and drink most of the milk that Niamh had been provided with to replenish blood. She peered at Robert’s arm worriedly.

                “There’s third and second degree burns all over this.” She wrapped it up. Luckily there were pressure bandages in the kit she had been provided with. “I don’t know what we’re going to do for you, you need skin grafts and all sorts. I can’t do that kind of stuff!”

                Robert was worried but it didn’t stop him being really nice to Niamh.

                “Don’t worry about it now. You’ve done plenty for me. It doesn’t even hurt so bad anymore.” He had been given a measurement of local anaesthetic.

                “Okay, your body needs to heal if you want to still be in shape when we get out of here. Get some sleep Robert.”

                Robert settled down for a nap. He couldn’t sleep though. His snores have been known to awaken ancient gods from eternal slumbers so this was probably a good thing for everyone else.

                They all ate the teacakes and scones, but this seemed to make everyone feel hungrier. The evening wore on. At several points Alicia had to go out to the car to fetch the nappies to change Nabilia. She eyed the disarmed rocket nervously as she walked past it. They chattered to one another, deliberately not mentioning that which they had lost.

                Nabila was contented watching her iPad. Occasionally she would get up and wonder about lifting blankets and pillows, as if wondering where the people who shared her milk chocolate skin might be hiding. Everyone took it in turns to pick her up and cuddle her. To make sure she was in safe company, she bit everyone’s toes. The taste-test must have come back as trustworthy, she made no further checks and went back to her iPad.

                Two hours went by and everyone agreed that the raw food they had been given had to be eaten. There was no evidence of anything to cook the food in, a mixing bowl and a piping bags being insufficient to the task.

                Anna came up with the bright idea of the robots they had all seen at the edge of the arena. From a distance they seemed to be made of metal, a chest plate might well be placed on the fire as a crude cooking utensil. Everyone was scared but Angphua and Robert bravely volunteered.

                They crept out into the darkness. The stadium felt huge and they were nervous as they made their way across. They were expecting all sorts of dangerous things to burst out of the darkness at them. Something touched Robert’s toe.

He squealed in terror, before realising it was just the wall to the arena.

                “Let’s not tell the others that that happened.”

                The stands were raised and they travelled around the rim a bit before finding a stairwell where they could climb up.

                The robots were even eerier close to in the starlight. Where the faces had looked blank from a distance close to they could be seen to have doll-like features etched on their faces.

                “Robert,” Angphu frowned. “What’s that light?”

                He leaned it to see a small red LED light flashing.

                “It says… Proximity detector?”

                There was a creak of metal on metal, as the head rotated on the neck. Sightless eyes looked directly at Angphu.

 

                Meanwhile, back at the shelter;

                “Am, why are you wondering around in just a bra?”

                “Oh, come on the boys are out. What does it matter?”

                “While the act in of itself is questionable I was actually asking out of curiosity for your motive?”

                “My shirt got all dirty and horrible. I thought I had a cut on the back from all that glass. I wanted to check for blood.”

                “Why?”

                “This is a really cute top; I need to look after it!”

                “It’s good that you’re keeping an eye on the bigger picture Am.”

 

                The robot stared at Angphu. Angphu stared at the robot. A hard drive could be heard whirring away in its chest

                “Uh, hi.” Angphu said nervously. “My name’s Fongph- I mean Angphu. I uh… I was just over here taking a walk you know? Lovely… Lovely night for walking.”

Angphu was rambling, caught in that empty gaze.

                “So, you’re a robot huh? Well I think that- I think that’s just brilliant. You don’t meet enough robots these days, do you? People are scared of ‘em I guess. All that bad publicity from those Matrix and terminator films. You know what? It’s discrimination. I’m on your side pal. Many of my friends are robots. Love ‘em. Have you met Siri? Lovely woman Siri. Always very helpful. Not that I’m saying that robots have to be useful to have a purpose in life! No, I -  I think robots should um, have rights uh- and be treated… Humanely?”

                The robots continued the noiseless scrutiny of Angphu’s face as he stuttered to a halt.

                “Whatever you do,” Robert hissed. “Don’t tell it we’re here to tear its body apart to use as a cooking pot.”

                Now I’ve said that Robert whispered here and indeed that is true. However, what I must further explain is that Robert’s voice is often unintentionally loud. The words would bring envy to the hearts of Shakespearian actors. They could have filled an auditorium without the aid of a microphone, entertaining hundreds of theatre goers who suffered from bad hearing.

                The head snapped to Robert.

                Proximity lights began flashing all around them.

                “Oh crap.”

 

                Back at the bunkhouse the topic of conversation was fighting back.

                “What are we going to do about the game then? We only saw one person running the place and Tan shot him before we had a chance to get any information.”

Niamh frowned as Amelia examined her shirt.

                “What did he look like?”

                “We didn’t really get a good look. He was in the distance and Tan shot him. He was in military uniform.”

                “Oh, crap I think that was Oscar.”

                “What!?”

                The group had known that Oscar had gone scouting but they all saw his absence in a different light now. Everyone looked horrified. Everyone except Amelia who was looking at her top and trying to decide if it was salvageable.

 

                “We should run.”

                “I agree.”

                Robert and Angphu legged it as thirty or so automatons stood up.

                “So Anphu,” Robert asked breathlessly as they raced down the stairs. “When you said many of your friends are robots did you mean like the electric kind or the inflatable kind?”

                “Come on Robert, every man gets lonely. Don’t judge me.” Angphu wasn’t going to let impending death impair his sense of humour.

                They had only made it about a hundred yards when they heard a clatter behind them. They glanced back and saw some of their pursuers had tumbled down. A few more reached the same point and something at their heels jerked tort and they too fell. As they crashed to the floor the two could see that the devices were actually skeleton thin rods, wires and motors. On each chassis the hollow copper skin had been mounted to create a slightly more human look. The bodies came apart as they struck the ground.

                “Look, there’s cables behind them!”

                “They’re all pugged in!”

                “Ha! No wireless for you guys!”

                All of the machines were struggling feebly at the end of their power leads. One waved at Angphu and beckoned him over.

                “I’m good thanks.” Angphu eyed the metal crowd that had gathered to a standstill behind the failed charge.

                The thing continued to gesture to no avail. When Angphu did not step closer it reached up and pulled its own head off. The head rolled gently to Anphu’s feet.

                “Well look at that.” Angphu picked it up. “I made a friend after all.”

                “What?”

                “It’s given us a cooking pot.”

                Unfortunately, the other automatons had not shared a bonding moment with Angphu. Their audio devices had not been engaged when he had been giving out his good ol’ Angphu charm. Inspired by what they had just witnessed the others plucked their own heads off, removed legs and forearms and stared to hurl them.

                A metal piece cracked a glancing blow to Angphu’s head and suddenly running very much seemed to be very much the fashionable thing once more.

                “Oh boy, oh boy I’m havin’ a hell of a day.” Robert muttered to himself as he ducked and ran.

 

                “I don’t think it’s a good idea to fight back against the people running the show.” Niamh was stroking her chin thoughtfully. “They’ve got all this technology. I mean, who the hell knew that teleportation existed?”

                “The Marvel cinematic universe has been trying to spread the word for years.”

                “Ah come on, be serious now.”

                “It’s true they’ve got a lot.” Anna winced as she sat up in her bunk. “They showed their weakness today though.”

                “What was that then?”

                “When Niamh broke their weapon tower.”

                They all glanced at the little one; she had fallen asleep on Alicia and Niamh’s lap, somehow nonchalantly star-fishing in such a way as to trap the two of them. Neither dared movement as they did not wish to wake her.

                “That was just luck though.”

                “I know yes; of course, it was. But think about what it shows. They’ve revealed that they’ve got dangerous technology. They’ve also shown us that they’ve not thought properly about how it all fits together. They shielded Niamh. They had homing missiles that locked onto her.”

                “How does that help?” Alicia frowned thoughtfully.

                “Oh,” Niamh cottoned on to the point that Anna was making. “It’s like going out and buying expensive computers, phones and games. Then you get home and realise nothing’s compatible. None of your systems are working together properly”

                “Yes. Do you see? A group of people have gotten hold of technology. They can use it passably. They’re not experts though.”

                “Huh.” Alicia looked doubtful. “It doesn’t seem like much of a hope, does it?”

The conversation was interrupted by heavy thuds on the outside of the shelter. Dents appeared with each thud, alarming everyone with the force of each blow.

                “What the-?”

                Robert and Angphu burst in the door.

                “Some of the robots are awake. And boy are they mad!”

                “Except this one.” Angphu waved the head “This one is my friend. I’ve decided to call him Nigel. Nigel and me, we’re pretty tight.”

                “Um, Angphu? Are you feeling alright?”

                “Wo' hěn hao, xièxie”

                “Uh… Whut?”

                “He got hit on the head.”

                Alicia got up to have a look at him. Nabila had already woken up to make her protests heard on account of the noise.

                “I’m fine, absolutely fine. I just feel a little sleepy. Wo xiang he kāfei.”

                “You know you’re switching between English and Mandarin, right?”

                "Don't worry Catiline my dear; I'm in complete control of the situation."

                Catiline was Angphu’s wife; she was not with them that day.

                "Catiline?"

                "Oh, this is not good."

"               I'm not Catiline, I'm Niamh, remember? I'm your buddy."

                "What? Oh no, you've forgotten your name!" Angphu grabbed Niamh wildly. "Your name is Catiline! Catiline you have to remember!"

                "Anphhu calm down, you've been hit on the head,"

                "Why are you calling me Angphu? You don't call me that! You always call me your snuggle bunny."

                Niamh looked alarmed.

                "Call me your snuggle bunny!" Angphu shook her by the shoulders desperately, caught in the throes of delirium. "Call me your snuggle bunny! Snuuuuuggle buuuuuunny!"

                Niamh's head jerked back and forth as Angphu yelled at her.

                "Angphu," Alicia gently placed her hand on Angphu's shoulder.

                Angphu looked at her, shocked.

                "Mother?"

                They let him to a bed and quietly tucked him in. Even after he was bandaged he kept muttering random nonsense to himself.

                "Marquis of cuddles... Hugmiester General... Rumbley Tumbley Rabbit..."

                "It's just the concussion." Alicia explained in concerned tones "Sometimes people just get confused."

                They took the copper head and turned it upside down in the fire. They melted some of the butter and cooked the chicken in it. It should have tasted poor, but hunger makes heaven of humble fare. Of course; they all felt pretty bad about the fact that they had to drink non-alcoholic beer. They all agreed that under the circumstance it was not a criminal offence (which apparently it is normally).

                

                After some brief shallow sleep discussion turned to how to deal with the people running the games.

                There appeared to be two separate camps of thought. Alicia and Robert wanted to stay in the shelter and do their best to hide from or deal with all challenges as they arose.

        The other group, (Anna, Amelia and Niamh) all wanted to take the fight to the enemy. They wanted to get out of the stadium and arm themselves to the teeth. Then they would proceed to “Go all gangster on those b******s” (not my words, Niamh was the one who suggested it.)

                Angphu couldn’t vote, being unconscious. Nabila seemed uninterested in the democratic process.

                The more they argued the worse things got. Anna quietly limped out the door as voices were raised and insults were thrown about. No one noticed until she came back into the room holding a small device.

                “What’s that?”

                “It’s the Satnav. Let’s look for clues.”

                They fiddled around with it.

                “It’s no wonder we couldn’t get any phone signal. There’s only one Wifi available. SufoenO? Never heard of them.”

                At this moment they all realised that SufoenO was the force behind these games.

                “Wait a minute, I’ve heard of Sufoeno. That’s the name of the company that runs the escape room we were going to after afternoon tea! Dave booked us all in.”

                “Did he read the small print?”

                “Who reads the small print? Too much like reading instructions.”

                “To be fair, we do normally leave that kind of stuff to Bob.”

                 Suddenly the Satnav spoke again, in the queer calm tone of voice it always used.

 

                “You have all failed to enter into the spirit of play. News rules will be introduced to rectify your reluctance. All players must run to the edges of the arena separately. You will all be alone again. You have one hour to comply.”

               

                I’d like to say that our friends all calmly and rationally reacted to this development. I’d enjoying describing them discussing it and making a joint decision in the given timeframe. Alas, in actual fact they spent most of the time bickering about what to do.

                Eventually the group that wanted fight back decided to leave together (they planned to carry a rather annoyed Nabila). Alicia and Robert had woken Angphu who had been given a thin grasp of the situation.

                They all stepped out of the door, preparing to part ways.

                The hour they had been given ran out.

                The missile that had lain forgotten on the car bonnet lit up like a Christmas tree. It beeped and whirred a few moments before detonating. The petrol tank ignited and the front of the car exploded in a blast of black smoke.

                A canon fired in early morning light.

                One of the friends would not live to learn who the mysterious Sufoeno might be.