Here's the thing

Here's the thing

A Poem by Marissa

The words you say,
The words you don't ,
They hurt.

The love you show,
And the love you don't express,
Is always tough love.

The lies,
The truth,
They're hard to tell apart.

The questions,
Are you proud, am I enough?
Sometimes still make me wonder.

Your laugh,
Your smile,
Always seem fake towards me.

I know,
Yes, I know these are little things,
But, little things can cause the greatest of pains.


© 2012 Marissa



Author's Note

Marissa
Note very good, but give me some advice??

My Review

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Reviews

Sometimes we give our respect away to people who don't deserve it and then we try to get it back from them.

I don't think I can adequately critique the work of one so young. I mistily remember being in high school as a time when I did not feel worthy; I never felt I measured up though others saw me as some sort of measuring stick for themselves.

I guess what I would say to the person in this poem is try to be calm. Things change so much and usually for the better as the years tick away.

Posted 4 Years Ago


You have penned down your inner thoughts ,which makes the poem its strength.


Posted 4 Years Ago


Marissa

4 Years Ago

thank you!
yeah..it seems to me you are being a little rigid here..it needs loosening a little I really only write in meter and rhyme but you are a free poet.....just write how you feel and try not to be restricted by verses and order

Posted 4 Years Ago


Marissa

4 Years Ago

Thanks! Glad you understand my free writing (:
I think my advice would be to be flexible. No where, any where does it say that your poem has to be fixed to a certain formula, change it as much as you like to the point where you like it, if others don't get it, oh well, others will :)

Posted 4 Years Ago


Marissa

4 Years Ago

Thank you! Great point! I love your reviews would love t get more feedback from you on my other work.. read more
writing a poem is the best way of pouring out your emotions. And that's what you've done her. The best thing you can do is talk it out. (Might be stinky advice, but I'm only 13! lol) And the poem wasn't all that bad. It was short, and honest :)

Posted 4 Years Ago


Marissa

4 Years Ago

Thank you! Your advice is exactly right thanks (:
Don`t listen to advice - make a poem from inside yourself and it will work, like this does !

Posted 4 Years Ago


Marissa

4 Years Ago

Thank you! You're right I shouldn't take advice and my poetry my poetry. thanks!
I like the way you've written it. Maybe the expression "can cause BIG hurt" isn't appropriate. Big isn't exactly the word we use for hurt. But overall it's a good poem.

Posted 5 Years Ago


Blue Ivory

5 Years Ago

Hmmm, how about "can cause a lot of pain." oh, even better:"could cause the greatest of pains"
.. read more
Marissa

5 Years Ago

yeah I do....I'll change it when I get home tonight...thanks for the advice and great help (:
Blue Ivory

5 Years Ago

You're welcome! ^_^
as a man, i think that a man is the same like a honey bee and a lady is like a flower. the bee would be smelling a flower while her eyes are looking for the next flower..i know that flowers know what bees are like so you feel it when the bee is into the next flower even if they are with them at this momene. you have expressed this in a very nicely way..

Posted 5 Years Ago


Marissa

5 Years Ago

Thank you! Strange way to express that, but yeah I think I get what your saying.
khalid

5 Years Ago

i dont think it is really strange..you are welcome
It's very honest, and sounds like a spoken word piece to me. I think it's great. Just say it outright, don't dance around the truth. Nice job. I have no advice :P sorry hun

Posted 5 Years Ago


Marissa

5 Years Ago

Oh, that's great I'm glad there's no advice that means it's really actually a good poem...yay!!!! th.. read more
The poem told the truth. Words can open or close doors. We must be kind and honest with the people we love. Thank you for sharing the excellent poem.
Coyote

Posted 5 Years Ago


Marissa

5 Years Ago

thank you glad you liked it.

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Added on December 10, 2012
Last Updated on December 13, 2012

Author

Marissa
Marissa

NC



About
Hi! Im Marissa I like writing poems and im not very good but it's how I get my feelings out. I'm a sophomore. Nothing better than friends and family. (but to me family isn't always blood) and well I l.. more..

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