BEANZ MEANZ!!

Beanz Meanz ??

Heinz ..wanted to be in the Beatlez

….until he saw the Stonez..

they threw jellyz at the Beatlez…

threw their undiez!! at the Stonez!!!

When he first stepped on a stage

they threw baked beans at him 

he wouldn’t have minded quite so much

If they’d taken them out the tin.

He vowed that this would change

so he went and joined a group

that definitely made a change

they threw cream of mushroom soup.

Now he’s at home watching juke box jury

with a very sad look on his face

Billy had taken his Fury

Adam had stolen his Faith

What he needed now was a mentor

…to lift him from this low…

though be careful what you wish for!

Too late!!……… here comes Joe!!

 

Joe who loved his music

who just had to make a noise

Oh! …he really liked his music

Just not as much.. as he liked boys!!

Joe knew that Heinz couldn’t sing

and his guitar barely mustered a riff

He’d still take him under his wing

He loved.. that little blonde quiff!!

oh! but Joe had a dark side

paranoia filled his head

a Jekyll and a Hyde side

kept a gun beneath his bed!

Visited graveyards so they said,

Recording the voices of the dead.

Spoke to Buddy Holly.. of course

seems Peggy Sue.. just got divorced.

“Follow me and you’ll go far

we’ll make a record tonight

I can’t promise to make you a star

but I’ll make you a satellite.”

Joe said “Marty Wilde and Rory Storm?

even their names are manufactured

with you….. its not the same..

you’re named after a manufacturer!!”

　

　　Recorded a tune in a sit-com room

Above a haberdashery

Rising star or rising damp?

Paid rent to Eleanor Rigsby?

 

Its a truth known to all

the higher you climb the farther you fall

they circled the world with telestar

burned up through the atmosphere

 

now drugs he consumed to ease the pain

have taken refuge in his brain.

his brain then whispered to his fears

“peers are stealing your ideas”

was haunted by the spectre

of Harvey Phillip Spector!

============

until that February day

that fateful day

when Miss Rigsby

took her face from the jar

and climbed the stair.

And as she started talking

Joe just saw his black dog barking

Pulled his gun from under the bed

… shot his landlady dead!!…..

 

Joe realising this might be hard to explain

Knowing that people might think him insane

Loaded that shotgun up again

Blew out his treacherous brain!!

=======

now I don’t want to sound dismissive

And I know you might find this shocking

But if you rent a room to a depressive

don’t enter without knocking!!

=========

with no little sympathy

I’ll now end this tragicomedy

With a certain synchronicity

A simple kind of symmetry

because

when Heinz Burt died

he was

…. 57 yrs old!!

　

　

　

　

Author's Note

the truth... and anything but the truth

Reviews

[Constance Payne]

I have not heard of this Heinz person but this life is a sad way to live. To crave something so much that you have to kill the pain of the craving.....

[Dr. Wood ?]

Great stuff......I often wondered what happened to Heinz.....Now the truth is out

[fred]

thanks doc...this is mostly true joe meek did kill his landlady before turning the gun on himself and poor heinz was 57 what are the chances?

[Dr. Wood ?]

you could not make it up