Generically Depressed

 

Along the left side of my soul

I am torn beyond recognition;

Ripped and twisted and slowly decomposing.

My tears flow in silent meaningless rushes of tide

like backyard rivers in a thunderstorm;

neither massive nor much noticed.

 

Memory is packed too full;

the good memories tangled with bad

and all coated with the red clay of home

that serves to confuse what is recent .

 

Pouting doesn’t suit me well anymore;

not a moody young willow but faded, jaded,

fatigue visible like vines that hang and wilt in the sun.

Roots destructively grown

into the mortar between stones;

Roots destructively formed within these bones.

 

Without the good grace to go insane

nor the fragility to be darkly, deeply depressed;

I am only tired

and rusted with destructive thoughts

that will never help nor hinder anyone.

 

Leaning forward against the wind

I take comfort in the warmth of summer’s rains,

And pray foul ashes and dirt will soon enough blend.

 

Reviews

[LR Young]

there's some lovely imagery here.. and the line fall is opaquely beautiful through the third stanza's "grown/stone/bone," and thereafter the flow sort of ceases into a mounting use of "I" which explains things. It's the difference between showing and telling really -- words like "insane" seem almost jarring here. And "darkly, deeply, depressed" does not provide the same grace as the previous three richly beautiful stanzas; It's too obvious. There's little to experience or imagine when it's laid out... what does being deeply, darkly depressed look and feel like? If the above stanzas are already standing in for this idea, then you are repeating yourself needlessly... I think with just a bit of reworking, this could become a dark and smooth, powerful piece.

[Emily B]

there is something of Edna St. Vincent Millay in these lines . . . but something that is uniquely the "southern" woman that you are, too . . . it is a new favorite

I hope this was only a passing fancy and not the color of your world these days.

[Dana Kathryn]

Likewise i feel your pain!But yes we learn from our most painful realitys...Life is hard but when we stand up to our Transgressions we gain Transformation!! We only get one life,there are no rehearsal's.Life is both darkness and light,We need to choose the light!! :)

[Ed Hart]

it is in such soil that wisdom takes root (when it does) and grows into such a beautiful flower...take heart, the time that remains is all for giving...

[Tiffany]

Mmmm, I was able to relate to this one. You have done a good job artistically magnifying a concept of sorts. Really nice. t.